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ejb Feb 2020
one day someone will love me the way I love them

I loved you so deeply and tried to show you with everything I am. I trusted you and let you know every inch of my soul and every secret in my heart.

But you do not love me back.

And I am sad.

Really, I'm heartbroken and I miss you.

I don't want to lose you.

But I can't continue to love you or I'll lose you.

How do you get over a love as deep as this? I have never felt this way before. This all-encompassing love. I want nothing more than to kiss you and run my fingers through your hair.

But you do not love me back. And no amount of hair dye or sad songs will change that. I can cry to 100 romantic movies and wish for love but it will not change a thing.

One day I will run out of tears to cry. But I don't know if I can ever look into your eyes again. Because I can't see you and not love you. You are everything to me.

My heart is broken and I don't know what to do.

I haven't felt a love this strong before and god I just want you.
this all just poured out of me and now i'm crying
ejb Feb 2020
i can feel my heart breaking and there is nothing i want more than you
ejb Aug 2019
cigarettes taste like you
and I've never craved nicotine
but tonight, I miss you
ejb Jul 2019
every headache is cancer
every heartburn is a heart attack
every bug bite is poisonous

every thought is a boulder
every thought is a gong
every thought is a hundred

every breath is my last
every sleep isn't enough
every ache is never ending

every touch feels like more
all my pain is never ending
I can't take it anymore
OCD is exhausting
ejb Mar 2019
I envy the birds that glide fearlessly above the trees

I change my clothes three times a day because I feel uncomfortable staying in the same place

I love tall trees and honey bees

I bought a bunch of fruit that all went bad
and I feel like a disappointment to my dad

I've wasted so much time being sad and angry
but maybe I only have myself to forgive
for thinking I could be happy for once
a continuation of the first piece. this series contains a collection of somewhat poetic thoughts I had but was never able to turn into an entire poem
ejb Mar 2019
I wish I'd never wasted poems on you.
you don't deserve it
ejb Mar 2019
i fantasize about running away while i sanitize my hands in an attempt to feel clean, not just of germs but of this cage i'm in
i sigh as i rub my hands together and decide to stay
i'm suffocating and want to runaway
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