There's a beauty in letting go. A freedom in giving up. A peace in surrender. After fighting for so long in the dark, blinded by expectations and pelted by reality, fighting, fighting until you no longer remember what you're fighting for. Escape the gilded cage of sanity! Just let go. Break the machine. Succumb to the anarchy of the soul. And take a breath for the first time since you were a child, when reality meant nothing to you and you were everything and nothing at all.
Return to your dream-state, that peace between sleep and waking, where everything is whole and one, and you are warm all the way through. Where the patter of rain and voices blows like a breeze through your soul. Where you don't think, only feel. Remember what it was like to feel love. Take a breath of blissful oblivion before the searing bludgeon of reality rips you from the fog and everything shatters. Turn back time, to where nothing mattered, and beauty was never far away. Return to a time where you had no worries, and you were not aware of your own naivete. Inhale exhale inhale exhale inhale exhale listen carefully as you inhale exhale and try to remember why you're here, what your purpose is. You knew, once upon a time. Find it.
Time is harsh, it waits for nobody. No matter how loud, how desperately you scream "Stop!", it seems to move ever faster, ripping you away from temporary pleasure. We have no power over it. We have no power, and yet we still fight. Why? Ask yourself, ask yourself why you are still fighting. What reason do you have to live? Who do you fight for? Why do you stay? Do you even have a reason?
Look beyond to a world of color, past the fog and gray of reality. We have no power over reality. We have no power over anything. So I ask again, why do we fight? Release yourself. Reality cannot change, and we cannot either. As much as we fight against it, we are bound by reality and its rules. Bound to who we are. Unchangeable and unbreakable are we.
There is a monster inside all of us and it takes great bravery to embrace it. Most of us are too afraid, and keep fighting, fighting, fighting to deny it. What right do we have to claim to be good? Embrace the darkness. There's a beauty in letting go.
You people don't know what it's like to live. You're drifting, floating through your miserable existence on screens, idolizing people just as sad as you are. In a world devoid of color, you blend right in to the grayscale tragedy of what we call "normal". It's ridiculous! Too afraid to take risks, to prim and proper for adventure, too worldly to understand true beauty, too selfish for love. You flee from the ugly truth of existence and choose to hide in falsities of your own design. You don't think. You think you know everything but you know nothing. I mourn you.
This world is so beautiful, but to experience it, you have to get beyond the wretched order of civility. Don't stop running until you reach the place where color is everywhere, where the sun and the sea and the mountains and the forest are brighter than any screen and stronger than any worldly riches. Where you're finally warm. Don't stop running until you can look up and see heaven in the sky, until the sunset and the clouds and the stars and the breeze breathe new life into you like you've never felt before,.
Surrender to who you are meant to be. Light can only come from darkness. This world is not meant to be plain, not designed for boredom and black and white. We were made for color and chaos and freedom and risk and adventure. We came from nothing and to nothing we will return. Only our souls are endless, and they yearn constantly for the freedom of what is beyond life.
We idolize life, idolize existence. In our endless pursuit of pleasure we fail to see what's actually important. We've grown blind to beauty. We are NPC's, wandering through life doing whatever we're told, never thinking for ourselves.
The saddest thing is: It's never going to change. We're never going to change. The condition of the world, of humanity, worsens steadily and will continue to worsen until God comes to save us all. We cannot change, do not have the capacity to change, myself included. We are doomed to disintegration of the soul, doomed to slowly spiral into a cruel insanity called normalcy. We cannot change, we cannot fight. But we can let go.
So find the music. Find the poems. Seep into them, into the music and the lyrics and the words and the feelings until you become them. Listen carefully to every note and word and melody. See every moment, watch closely. Exit your body until you are floating above it all, noticing everything, feeling everything, loving everything.
Let go
Let go
Let go
Exhale inhale exhale inhale exhale inhale exhale inhale until you feel yourself becoming yourself, becoming the world, becoming a phantom and a planet and a child and a monster and an angel and an animal and yourself and everybody else and most of all become feeling, become love and desire and pain and rage and beauty and joy and peace.
There's a freedom in letting go