The door closes,
And the lock clicks.
Fabric russels,
Jeans unzip.

I can feel the gentle scratching
Of your stubble
On my neck,
There’s your teeth...
Your soft breath.

Your lips are full,
I kiss your pout.
One hand finds my breast,
The other cradles my head.
I slide my hands up the curve of your hips,
You pull my hair back
To tilt up my chin.

Down my neck,
To my chest,
“Take off your shirt.”
Blowing cold air onto my *******
To tease me,
To remind me
You’re in control.

Kissing my stomach,
Your hand runs up the inside of my thigh.
My fingers grip your hair
As your face pushes between my legs.

Your mouth is a symphony.

I’m shaking,
I can barely stand,
I’m holding your shoulders so I don’t collapse.
****** after ******.

You come up for air,
And push me onto the bed.
You spread my legs apart
And press your forehead to mine,
I suddenly roll you over onto your back
Slide down to my knees,
And just gently breathe.

I know you love it
When you feel my tongue
Make one solid movement up your ****.
I slip a hand down to touch myself
While *******,
My tongue
Rolling you around in my mouth.
You hold my hair back for me,
And I look you in the eyes,
Moaning at my own touch,
And I know you haven’t had enough.

I want you.

I need you.

I climb on top of you,
And sink down onto you
Breathless moaning,
Gasping,
Hips crashing.

You wanted to be friends,
Which made me nervous.
That didn’t stop you.

You wanted to write a poem,
Which made me think I’d look foolish.
That didn’t stand in your way.

I didn’t want you to see the poverty
I lived my life in,
But that didn’t bother you at all.

My family is crazy,
They’ll drive almost anyone away.
They’re not the cute kind of crazy,
They’re the medicated (or should be) kind of crazy,
My sister yelled at you,
That didn’t deter you.

In the middle of sobbing
Shaking
Sobs,
Anxiety attacks,
And insomnia,
You stayed on the phone,
Or with your arms around me.
Every melt down,
Every pain,
You never left.
That never stopped you.

You’ve always fought for me.
It’s my turn now
To fight for you.

If ever you wanted to hold me

If ever you wanted to tell the truth

If ever you wanted to love me

If ever you wanted to put your hand behind my head as we crashed hips in bed

If ever you wanted a future

Please

Have you ever
Wanted to
Disappear?

Be a walking pair
Of invisible
Eyes and ears.

Give in to your bloodlust
For information
And appalling
Curiosity.

Find out
What he
Really thinks of me.
What he says about me
Behind my back.

Have you ever
Wanted to
Disappear?

Be a nothing.

Exist
Merely
As a part
Of an ever changing
Glorious universe.
Feel the vibrations
And the warmth,
The cold
And the wind.

Not have to live
With the responsibility
Of making anyone happy.
Not me.
I wouldnt have to be happy.

Have you ever wanted to disappear?

The Fool signifies new beginnings,
Because only a fool would want
To start over.

I feel like a fool.

I told your mother
My plans for our wedding,
I named our child,
And dreamed up fantasies
To whisper in your ear.

I imagined
A magical land,
A large bed in a small apartment,
Fat cats to purr beside us,
And warm blankets
Tying our bodies together
As we twisted and turned in our sleep.
And windows,
I would have to have windows.

They say life is a highway
We’re in two cars
Speeding toward each other
With our necks sticking out of the windows,
Trying to find a way
To gently collide
Without dying.
But we’re going too fast,
So fast
The breath has been ripped from my lungs.
Get ready to crash.

My older sister said,
“Everyone has a list.
Every person has things about them that are bad,
You’ve just got to find someone who's list you can deal with.”

You’re passion.
You are filled with passion in every thing you do.
You have passion in your loneliness,
And in that you have desires.

Beginning again is horrible,
It’s erasing the bad with the good.
It’s seeing where the beautiful memories and the horrible mistakes weave into each other,
And burning both.
Only a fool would begin again.

But I’m a fool.

A fool
For you.