Let's pretend I love you
And you do the same
We're now dating, So for starters
I'm thinking you need a pet name

Let me think...
Angel, Miracle, Sunshine or Delight
Well I'v used them before and sadly
I ended up with my pillow at night

Let's pretend we are happy and
I promise not to break your heart
And you believe me, then in turn,
You promise to do your own part

Let's pretend I've never done this before
I must do it right, So I drop on both knee
Let's pretend I Reached into my pocket
Still on my knees, then reach out to thee

Let's pretend you're wondering if these things are true
Hey! Look, these tears serenade deep affection for you
The pretence is over and that time, past due
When love does more, as words become few
©Crossyde

Dear girlfriend am sorry for being a man
Am sorry I wasn't there to change God's plan
So when He made this piece of hardware,
called it "man"
And installed it's supporting drivers of emotions,
to rely on a constant database update from your
repository of respect and value,
It was obvious
That only then can your heart
ping my love server.

Dear girlfriend am sorry for being your man
Am sorry for not being able to meet your demands
You see,
It is true that you, like every other lady,
Wants a hero to bank on
One to keep you safe, with a shoulder to cry on
But then,
It's a shame I couldn't afford
the attention you needed and so deserved
So in trying, I only scattered your heart abroad

Dear girlfriend am sorry
For not bringing out the Queen in you
Cause after so many failed attempts,
The peasant mind of me thinks,
Maybe I wasn't meant to be a king afterall
Maybe I should never have walked to you,
Standing up tall
Maybe the only thing I was ever meant to say,
Was sorry, dear girlfriend
For not bringing out the Queen in you.

Dear girlfriend am sorry for being the man
Who made you feel
I was just like any other man
Dear girlfriend am sorry, I tried my best
To be of little difference, from the rest
Dear girlfriend am sorry
you failed to understand
I could only do so much with
A heart and my hand
Am just a man
And ordinary man
And a weak one at that
Am sorry dear girlfriend
Cause if ever I had an offer to make
It would be a heart, with a prayer that
Even with it's weakness,
You ignore and take.

I see everything through the eyes of my brokenness
The torment kills every shred of confidence in me,
to raise my head and face this reality.
I sincerely hope that what I had always dreaded
had not caught up with me.
How do I look pass this failure,
and behold the light pointing out the path to redemption?
What would it take to make a fresh start?
Oh no....
Do I even need to make  a fresh start?
Oh no...
I need to refreshed my start

Take no hostages,
plunder not a thing
Leave no wreckages
But take me, the king
Hold me to ransom
by the spellbound ring
Am only handsome
When you, my joy, bring

I almost sold you out for a fake smile
For moments thoughts, I mean reasoning mourned my neglect of her like a lover mourning the lose of her prince charming on their first honeymoon night.
It wasn't the first, but the second glance that ensnared my conscience into thinking it could compare to the radiance that greets me into sunrise every morning.
I wonder...
Did you feel a strangeness in your eyes, or a sudden contraction of betrayal on your face?
Because I did.
I felt the coldness of emptiness caressing my conscience like white on rice, guilt was all over me
But wait...
It was just a smile, I thought to myself, how harmful could that be?

I almost sold you out for a cheap kiss
Yes.... My second glance made it look and feel too fine and sweet to miss.
The clasping of our lips panged  heavy on my confidence
Voice of reason in me grew from still small to a roaring rebuke...
Stop please stop, you're too much for this.
Stop please stop, you must not insist
But like a river determined to flow into the sea I kept on in that path and in real time, paving way of exit for my conscience whenever that voice of reason spoke.
It is just a kiss, who would fall for this?
Who would get carried away by a simple act such as that?
It was strange, the taste of something new, the taste of a sensation that didn't come from you.
I felt the coldness of emptiness caressing my conscience like white on rice, guilt was all over me
But wait...
It was just a kiss, I thought, who would ever fall for this?

I almost sold you out for a one night stand
So ashamed,
Like, "what was I thinking?"
How could I not smell a fowl play when the temporal promised a more lasting fulfilment than the eternal?
It seemed as if life had me set up and all of the odds placed against me...
But wait...
It wasn't life that made me look back
It wasn't fate that dragged my body into this unhealthy Union where I now stand with my conscience, desperately in need of a re-circumsision...
It wasn't destiny that led me to give away my dignity for some momentary pleasure at the expense of purity
I guess it has been me all the way
Setting up the trap and turning back to take the bait
What now?
Waking up from the illusion with half my senses in the right place and acknowledging the one thing that makes the difference between what I almost thought to be life what void your presence had filled...
Bottom line is..
You actually saved me even when I almost sold you out.