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 Dec 2016
Eleanor Rigby
What has life made of me?
Where has life taken me?

This body has never been mine, nor will this mind ever be.

There is a terrific sadness in every time
I look in the mirror and pretend to smile.

Dear Adam,
I have missed the spring and I am coming to you soon
The eyes that flicker, the stories behind the eyelids
The heart that ***** in the air
Like a flightless bird that dreams to fly.
Make sure you open up those heavy arms of yours
Make of my thin body your prisoner
Forever
See me for the second time,
Look at me as if it was the first time.

Adam, the ground has never been mine to walk upon
This Earth is selfish, she wants us all
But I am weary, just like you.
Everywhere I look, I find wrinkles
Old objects full of dust
Young people full of lust
Golden hearts full of rust.

Adam, I have been reeking of desolation
Since the day I died
Right there on grass that has never been greener
Under a sun that has never shone brighter
Since I died
Of longing
I have been reeking of desperation
If it wasn't for the books you left me,
If it wasn't for this letter today
If it wasn't for the hope of finding you again
I would have long turned into a portrait
Copied off of a portrait of a portrait
Of a portrait someone painted off the back of their mind
Intelligible and faint.

Adam, the lines on my palms are fading
Drip by drip
The water in me is adding up
And drowning what life has left of me
Poor little soul, good for nothing but the sadness

Adam, I wish I was sad like you
But I am not sad
I am bored,
Like a writer that never learned to write
A painter without paints
A mermaid on land
I am bored like the zoo.

I am coming to you soon.
But I know you're not there.

Goodbye summer and everything that's as clear
I will miss you my dear.


-- Watercolour
 Dec 2016
Tom Balch
Co-Lab with Maggie Magnolia.



On a cold Christmas morn long years ago
lay a soft fresh dusting of pure white snow,
covering the trenches and no man’s land
turning signs of a war to a place so grand,
somehow this beauty affected all men
the cold winter silence broken and then,
a single voice singing O Silent Night
sung so beautifully putting things right.

Everyone joined in from every side
then Stille Nacht stopped all men in their stride,
and with every line the voices just grew
all men sang Schlaf in himmlicher ruh,
they laid down their arms and walked unafraid
meeting the enemy on this Christmas day,
showing their photos of loved ones back home
friendships were formed and a hate for war grown.

Each man and young boy were afraid on that day
but good actors they were, all their fears hid away,
grasping that moment of peace in their hands
they thought of their loved ones and dared to make plans,
alas all was lost as new shots reigned clear
in place of their hopes was a fresh feeling of fear,
nothing has changed as we march forward to war
this Christmas we ask: What was it all for?

On this cold Christmas morn stood in the snow
are millions of crosses row after row,
each bearing a number, unit and name
reminding us all that war´s not just a game,
and yet they played football in no man’s land
forgetting for a moment wars evil plan,
the spirit of Christmas had won over the day
the soldiers became friends to the generals dismay
.
 Dec 2016
Eric W
I stare at the wall
with thoughts thick as molasses sliding
down my arms,
mind is blank, the refrigerator hums,
semi-solitude.
Tickle the ivories, hoping to spark
the motivation to learn a song,
but instead find ashes where
fire has not been in god knows how long.
My brain has heard the screams of
my liver and knows it is time to
rebalance the chemicals,
but it will take some time.
I'm surrounded by books with knowledge,
yet all I have the will to do is
add to mine my sub-standard
notes.
Write the things that feel like
sentences, but when spoke,
are accidental rhythm and
stride, I don't know.
My eyelids have attached to them
dangling rocks under gravity's
command while my eyes cannot
dare to fall under a restful pitch,
so I stare.
Catatonic, canonical,
half here, whole gone,
I stare.
 Dec 2016
Jim Timonere
I don't want to be here anymore.
  Not just here, anywhere.
I rode through moments
  That hung on me like a chain of
Black pearls which got so heavy I
  Can't lift my head anymore to see what's
Coming.  If I could, I'd only regret it.
The pressure to be what was expected
   Built too high while no one had the pressure
To be what they promised.
  The expectations killed me


I don't want to be here anymore.  
  The reason I am is cowardice
Because I know this place and I can only
  Guess what's next.
This sprang out of a passing mood I hope you never feel.
 Dec 2016
phil roberts
I am accompanied by ghosts
Haunted by broken hearts
And useless regrets
Loss of the living is almost worse
Than the loss of life
But it happens
And now
Without the optimism of hope or love
Life tires of me and I of it
Ah, but alas
I cannot die
Because heaven will not take me
And daddy says I cannot go back home
To Hell

                   By Phil Roberts
 Dec 2016
Sk Abdul Aziz
When forming an opinion about a person, it is important that you take your time...people are seldom what they seem..no one reveals their true self in the beginning...it is only with the passage of time that you get to see a person's real colour.
 Dec 2016
Hank Helman
He learned English.
By rereading
The instructions
The ingredients,
The head office addresses,
The countries of origin,
The nutritional estimates,
And the sizes and weights
Off the back
Of the heat and ready to eat cookie dough packages,
In aisle 5.


He studied the words
And salivated over the contents
Progressed quickly
And memorized the recipes of other
Easy to bake products.
Pictures of cakes and butter tarts in his dreams
A joyful discovery,
The sweet promise
Of the full shelves
In a giant grocery store,
Two blocks from the single room
He made into his home.

He was hungry. Always.
For all things,
And motivated by nightmares of wolves,
Packs of predators in his dreams
And his empty stomach,
Ruled him with a continuous hum,
A sort of tinnitus of his entire body
And so
To spend an hour in the dessert section,
Of a building full to the sadistic edge of its light fixtures
With food,
Made him drift again
And wish for better things.

Eventually he graduated to cookbooks
Second hand bookstores,  
Memorized ‘from scratch’ the recipes of hundreds of dishes,
Crispy potato skins, eggplant caviar, chicken- avocado and tomato soup,
He became a code breaker,
An industrial spy with intent
His focus narrowed by near starvation
Within a year he could recall
And write down
4500 different ways to prepare food.  
Each day he would memorize one or two new recipes,
An exercise
Where he learned measurement and actions.
He taught himself to stir, to ladle, to sear,
And he learned to convert grams and ounces and cups,
He knew temperature equally in Celsius and Fahrenheit,
He learned to sliver, to filet, to carve, and
To put butter under the skin of a guinea hen,
And roast it into a golden delicate anticipation.
Allant knew how to prepare.

On January 1st when all of New York stayed in bed
For a few extra hours
He approached a food truck in Brooklyn,
Whose owner was tired and hung-over.
Using the universal sign language of calm strangers,
Along with his easy charm
He convinced the weary man to let him cook.


Within 15 minutes he had made grilled peaches and split sausages
Over which he poured a light sauce made from
Orange, mango and mustard.
The food truck owner tasted a spoonful
And devoured the magnificent creation in two bites,
The look on his face as if he had seen God.


Allant went from truck to stall to indoor grill
Until line ups went around the block.
He was grateful of course,
Grateful for the hunger,
The night sweats brought on by memories
Of evil beyond belief,

He worshiped his good fortune,
Spoke loudly about freedom as a gift,
Loyalty as a lifelong obligation and
Guilty that the world had given him a chance.
He became
Unshakable in his belief
That others must be helped.
So he made the immigrant promise,

And never for one second
For the rest of his life,
Did he ever refuse a tired man a seat
A hungry man a meal,
A broken man an ear,
A lonely man his comfort,
Or an angry man his smile.
This ,he said, is the dream.
Today Trump continues to lie and take credit for things he did not do. The first casualty of War is truth. We are at war. It is now permissible to sexually assault a woman-- it just boys being boys-- how adorable. My apologies to women everywhere, of all backgrounds. We should have done better, we should elect better men. We failed.
 Dec 2016
Silence Screamz
I was born of dust and bones,
to a battered mother across the pond.
With a warm *****
and gentle hand,
she would cradle me gently.

On a many days,
her eyes would melt tears
into my cotton wool blanket.
I felt her agony
seep through the simple
fabric of our bond.

The coward would stalk
her with his angry words,
Knowing she could not
leave him, because she
feared more bitter moments
of bruises

During the silent times,
her violent screams would turn
to whispers and lost time,
But she would always find a way
to cradle me in her arms.

As minutes turned to hours in the day,
I laid helpless in my crib.
A somber calm shadowed over me,
the feeling of my warmth was gone.
I wept but a single tear down
my rounded red cheek.

I could not cry anymore,
for I feared those angry words
and violent hands.
I laid in her whispers and lost time.
The cradle of her warm *****
and gentle hand were
no longer here.
From an infant point of view. Cradled by a mother, we seem to never forget when it all started
 Dec 2016
mrmonst3r
The lies we tell
our lovers
our friends
Hurt more than any
Malice could.
I'll always love you.
I'll always be your friend.

Don't ever say those words.
They cut deeper than you know.
Spare me.
 Dec 2016
phil roberts
I've used up the speed I used to need
Running hard at walls
All I got was blood and snot
And a large boot in the *****
But it's not over
Nothing's done
Oh no
The fight goes on

I've had knock backs from throwbacks
And been ridiculed by imbeciles
Half wits have had their say too
But eventually I'll get through
The fight goes on
On and on
Until I change their minds

                                         By Phil Roberts
 Dec 2016
phil roberts
When I was a young man
A heedless headlong consumer of life, was I
Above and beyond the norm or necessity
I wore paths deep and wide
To the pleasure centres of my brain
And I rode my soul like an easy *****
Oh happy daze of hedonism
How sweet life tasted then

If there was drink to drink
We drank it
If there were songs to sing
We sang them
If there were fights to fight
We fought them
We had fast feet and faster wits
If there was hell to raise
We raised it
Excess and adventure in equal parts
How fast, how high we flew back then

And then the magic playground
Became a bleak and dangerous place
Peopled by predators and prey
In an ever changing food chain
And I was only one step away
From the totally oblivious
One brain cell ahead of
The permanent reality challenged
Then friends began casually dying
Barely noticed in the rush to join them
Now the race is on
And I have grown old and slow

                                              By Phil Roberts
 Dec 2016
Phoenix
Thank you
So much
You *******

Who do you think you are?
How dare you
Remind me of my insanity?

Do you hear the whispers
Of a thousand different demons?
Do you feel the collar choking your neck?
Does your head spin?
Does your body feel weak?

How dare you
Lecture me for my anxiety
When I know
That I need to change

I'm working at my pace
Not yours
Because it's not your problem

Yes
I get your concern
Especially considering I don't leave my room
But who do you think you are?

Reminding me
That I'm ******* insane
That I'm not normal
Just pushes me closer to the edge

I. *******. Know.

I know I need to change
I know I need to get out
I know I need to talk to people

I already know
So lecturing me
Doesn't help anyone

I have built a shell
To protect myself from the world
And yelling at me
To get out of this shell
Just makes me cower further inside

Are you the one
Who had a panic attack
From ordering lunch?
Are you the one
Who is constantly paranoid
That no one loves you?
That you don't matter?
That everything around you is a lie?

I didn't think so

So who are you
To tell me it's all in my head?
To tell me it's my choice?
You might as well tell me to get over it
To **** it up and move on

Would you say that to me
If my leg was broken
And it caused me pain?

No
You would tell me
To sit down and relax
Even if it's just for a few minutes

My mind
Is broken
Into a thousand different pieces
And I'm trying
So. ****. Hard.
To put it back together
But your words
Shatter what little progress I have made

So you, sir
Can **** right off
And leave me alone
Because this is my war
Not yours

You have no right
To say a **** thing
Especially considering
You've never been cursed
With a mental illness

Now don't get me wrong
I'm not looking for pity
I just hate when you push me

But most of all
I hate this
With a passion
I don't want to be insane
But it's the hand I was dealt
And I'm working with what I got

I don't know
Why my anxiety has gotten so bad
It's a mystery to even me
But until you walk a mile
In my shoes
You have no right to say anything

No
*******
Right
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