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I've always been afraid to be ******
Never wanted to be a raging hormonal beast
Loving her parts but not her whole
Perverse thoughts staining my soul

But wanting her skin AND mind is fine
An appreciation that ages like wine
Thinking of your body while feeling your light
Wanting to make love then hold you tight

To please is to love
Learned that from above
Your comfort is a priority
*** is wanted but part of the minority

No scheme or plan
Coming before you a bare man
Offering the radiant tangible feelings in my hand
Fighting to stay when other ran

Drowning in the depth of her essence
Overcome by your totality
Unable to exist with you in reality
Hence why he's the latest fatality

But I'm here on demand
Trust me, I'm your biggest fan
Don't worry, it'll be alright
I'll be here when you greet the morning light
A very personal poem that explains my anxiety around women who are beautiful. Inside and out.
I sat on the edge of my bed seeking wisdom
but I had lost any semblance of faith
this was my only truth
I was of a lost generation
one devoid of hope and light
behind me flowed a lazy river

I placed my hand onto a book of faith
praying it would grant me wisdom
reaching over I turned on the light
and listened to the running river
thinking about the failings of my generation
and if any of us new the truth

what will become of my generation
are we blind to the light…
too apathetic for the truth…
too hip to recognize wisdom
once again my attention was drawn to the river
one of the few things in which I had faith

I closed my eyes trying to remember the truth
or if I had ever known wisdom
were there any in my generation
able to truly hold onto faith
shimmering sunlight danced across the ripples of the river
and I shut off the light

soothed by the peaceful sounds of the river
a calmness wrapped my body in warm light
a knowing came over me for the next generation
cosmic radiation was bringing humanity a new wisdom
dawn was breaking and with it a new truth
within ourselves was the only key to faith

this feeling passed with the fading light
but within me stayed this truth
maybe I was the voice of my generation
the purveyor of a brand new wisdom
the one to impart hope and faith
on the masses of humanity flowing like a river

the wisdom of humanity is tainted by faith
the truth changes with each new generation
we are all sparking light dancing across the cosmic river
 Jan 2016 Coleseph Nelzsun
Irene
I have learned that there is beauty in the silent and quiet.
That you don't have speak eloquent words to be heard, seen, or understood.
Your presence alone is enough.
 Jan 2016 Coleseph Nelzsun
Irene
the worst type of loneliness
is when you're surrounded by a sea of people
yet you feel invisible
and alone
that no one cares about you
and you sit there in pity
feeling so empty inside
 Jan 2016 Coleseph Nelzsun
Irene
i feel like i've always known people
on the surface
and hid my true self from others for years
i crave deep relationships
but hopefully
i can let go of my fear
and just be myself
and i guess sometimes
you need those surface level friendships
to make you appreciate your deeper relationships more
 Jan 2016 Coleseph Nelzsun
Irene
We tell people to be themselves
Yet we judge them when they're being themselves
I have been programmed
Been tighten with the wires
Cant move and think beyond the limit
I am smiling as no sadness got place

I work, care and love
Dont have choice beside that
I make myself happy
Dont know how to express hurt

Can you please make me feel
That I can cry& share my problems
Can you give me time to feel the love
Want to do the thing you are doing for long

And poor me , he switched me off
Reprogrammed me
And make me robot again
:(  :(
 Jan 2016 Coleseph Nelzsun
NV
I SLAMMED THE DOOR SO HARD, THAT IT COULD HAVE FALLEN OFF IT'S HINGES,
THE SAME WAY I COLLAPSE TO MY KNEES SOMETIMES.
I SLAMMED IT WITH THE KIND OF FORCE THAT IT  TAKES ME TO LOVE, AND GOD KNOWS I LOVE WITH THE POWER OF EARTHQUAKES AND TORNADOS COMBINED.
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