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In that moment,I was the only one who saw how alone you were.
Without verbal agreement we both understood that
I shouldn't leave you alone,but it was also understood
that you needed a moment alone to grieve in silence.
Right before me stood the man I had feared
& idolized since I was a child.
Right before my eyes you became undone.
With that understanding in mind I left you alone,
but not before giving you an awkward yet necessary hug .
In the years to come, I would have never imagined
that it would be our last one.
Cree Scythe
I wish i could quit you cold turkey.
you are a form of escapism
and i am seeking sobriety
please please sweet addictions let go of me..
-Cihannah F.-
Somewhere is a coward still in the closet ,
or laying next to you in the bed.
The  biggest cowards are disguised in uniform
Powerful cowards on pedal stools,hidden in congress.
Most cowards often promise to be lovers
but will run when you sing their name
cowards holding hands
rubbing their" happiness" in your face
cowards who were supposed to be parents
cowards who promised to be friends
careless cowards who wanted commitment
but never saw it through till the end
cowards buying flowers
cowards falling in love
there are cowards 6 feet under
yet some cowards make it above
I see a coward in the mirror
There is a coward in all of us
He left her with two of his favorite sweaters
one t shirt ,a pair of jeans and new Adidas
Yet he had no intention on returning.
In the first week of waiting
she would fold the clothes in a corner
smiling foolishly to herself
thinking of how he would have
something to wear when he returns.
In the second week of waiting
her smile started to fade
Shed sit in the corner of her bed
with one of his favorite sweaters on and wait.
She found a little reason to smile again,
for the clothes still carried his scent.
she would crawl in her the corner of her bed
and draw the hoodie strings and
suffocate herself in soaked sweater sleeves
till she drifted off to sleep.
In the third week of waiting
she washed his clothes
for the scent was overwhelmingly repugnant.
now they belonged to no one
She laid the clothes out on the floor
placed a cigarette in her lips and lit a match
threw the flame to the floor
and watched the burning man
He trapped my spirit in a lead decanter.
Whether to indulge ,alone or
while entertaining company that is never my own,
every time he calls I come pouring out
in a sea of salt water and toxic feelings
We'll probably both die from this.
But what tastes better and
what is more sweet than
spirits on the rocks?
I will not be bitter this time.
As I only better with age,I will
'be sweeter than your 'sweet talk';
The most delicious tasting poison
known to man
I would hate to find fragments of you spread too thin across their cliche coffee stained poetry books .
They'll tell you how smooth you go down and place you on the top shelf
When in reality you are a cheap shot of ***** that burns,but gets the job done
and that's what makes you all the more alluring
-Cihannah F.
In the past twenty four I realized
you'll fall pitifully hard before you fly
Thought I felt the pain taking away every bit of my inner being
looked in the mirror & caught a glimpse of my wings
I wont take counsel from fallen angels
who've made a home in the ground
they'd hate to see my fly higher than where they've been
and when the joy ride is over, they wont want me around
I wont take counsel from fallen angels
who no longer know who they are now
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