I'm educated
But not enough

Father Greeley believed Jesus was not humble.
He was tough.

Talkin' Chi Town
Call my bluff

American philosophy
Mostly fluff

But American music
The Right Stuff!

lawns are a thing
i watched the history
been to a museum in southport

pretty place that for a town
with council gardening you know
all neat and patterns with orange
usually

here it is left longer for the wild things
to live and hide

then mowed much later
in the summer with grit
and determination

i have a real old green one
hand pushed yet I keep it safe
and use the electric mower
carefully

was the bike delivered safely?

any day now it will be my time,
my time to shine,
to live,
to be happy,
to laugh,
to be happy to be alive.

any day now it will be my time.
a day where I can finally wake up content,
with my anxiety at bay.

any day now.

any day now.

it will stop any day now,

right?

I undervalue myself
While overvaluing
Everything around me

I put on your deodorant when I was
getting ready for work because I wanted
to smell like you.
I knew it would be the last time your
scent followed me.
Like the last time I would lay with you,
or kiss you
or touch you.
Missing you is the hardest thing I’ve ever done,
and I have to do it again.
I know I’ll be okay in 6 months but
right now, I’m not.

This is for you:

-the girl who is so ashamed because of her acne,
-the girl who cries in front of her mirror because she doesn’t
look like Picasso’s muse,
-the girl who forgot how to smile because of her problems,
-the girl who cries her eyes out every night because of him,
-the girl who is so terrified to attach because of her past relationship,
-the girl who is different from the others,
-the girl who wants to save every soul she meets, except hers,
-the girl whose heart, blood and soul runs wild,

-you are so much more than the sprinkles from your skin.
-you're not Picasso’s muse, but you definitely are God’s muse.
-don’t waste your life being so stressed, just enjoy the journey.
-you need to be strong.Cry your heart out, but stop,your tears are too worthy , make them rare, for the real ones.
-try to love yourself first, then someone else.
-your future is not defined by your past.
-you need to save yourself first.
-run with them, darling, and never look back.

This is for you, girls.
You, no matter what, are good enough.
You are lovable.
You are strong.
You are independent.
You are different.
You are rare.
You are you, and that is your power, learn how to use it.

Like an old friend inviting you to come inside.
Familiar. Comforting.
It will grasp you in its arms and hold you close;
And when you're ready to leave, it wont let you go.
You will beg and plead to be happy,
and it will put up a fight.
It will make you think that the only way to escape it is to take your own life.
If you are lucky, you can break free;
and it will sit and watch you from afar.
Calling your name.
Welcoming you back into it's arms.
It will intrude your thoughts.
Make you think you are worthless.
That you're better off dead.
Just keep telling yourself that it's all in your head.
Keep moving. You will get far.
Depression is not who you are.