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You were enchanted by the mystery,
You thought it was love and pursued me.
Been excited to discover every part of me.
Touched me like a book, what an interesting story it could be.

I am just ordinary,
people might see me as an old book that could not be understood easily.
I am just nobody,
but you brought me up to life where my existence has been saved from a tragedy.

You have stolen my heart that made my feelings to ramble.
'T was confusing...
and for a moment, I never thought that this will cause me to slumber.
'T was frightening...
A nightmare when we became lovers.

We both made this story, a fairytale.
In the end, it's ourselves that we fail.
Fantasizing each word, trying to mend the aching wounds.
It's not the sword that cuts, but the lies that's ripping us 'till we hear the rhythm of the heart that pounds.

I have never lived my life through your expectations.
Still, we tried to chase everybody at their romantic phase,
while being deceived by our own illusions
As I turned the page, showing fears that I couldn't face.

I laughed when you told me that, alone, I can write it beautifully.
like the songs with a perfect melody.
You think that tearing me apart could turn into a perfect art,
Leaving me afraid and lonely.

I was left there, hanging.
In every page, horrible scenarios are ranging
I was left there hoping,
Just in case there still be a happy ending.
Stalwart Dull Apr 20
They're attractive to see
long, thin, sharp as nails
they grow slow like snails
its life is one long jubilee

Butterfly is not a meal
but when they flew in your stomach, it felt surreal
is something that you cannot steal
a hunger that is hard to fulfill

As when thorns and butterflies collide,
You wouldn't even know how to survive
Thorns will **** you for a while
The worst feeling that you cannot hide

Thorns will pierce you and the pain is mild
Butterflies will die, even if they go wild.
Stalwart Dull Apr 19
Something inside me is pounding.
Do I still have a heart to feel about the situations that looks surreal?
I witnessed a horrible scenario, it was revealed.
But all I knew was there's something pounding inside me.

I can't explain if I was hurt nor I was nervous,
But I noticed something within me
It's breaking me, but I was confused
Tears won't come out, even emotions were unreadable

My hands were shaking, I was rattling deep inside me
But nothing comes out, I want to calm myself down
So all I did was to keep in silence, will you say it's gonna be alright while holding my hand?
I don't know how all of these will end.
Are there thoughts or feelings that you just hardly understand?
Stalwart Dull Apr 16
You were full of thoughts deep inside you that was kept for a long time,
And I was constantly amazed the way  your feelings was confessed
Something that's inside your heart makes the people got impressed
But I wasn't so sure, and I think that a one false move would constitute a crime

I hate you, the way I hate other people
And that bothers me, for I should be the person who doesn't care at all
I do. In a short span of time I did stop caring
But most of the time I never think about mine

You will never be the first person who did something for me, either good or bad
But you're the only person who told me something that I forgot but can still feel it,  and its makin' me mad

This should be sweet, a message that could make your heart beat
But I don't know how to compose something
It's full of confusion, I only write because of grief
Still, I wanna write for you, for someone special that I should treat
Stalwart Dull Apr 16
I need someone who will hold my hand
When he felt that life is getting tough.
Someone who will understand by just staring in my cold eyes
To lift my mood without using sweet lies.
Because I only wanted to feel that I am more than just enough.

There are lots of things that I wanted and needed,
And I don't think that I deserve it.
Something's missing, I wasn't perfect.
But there was you who made me feel that I wasn't lacking of something.
December 08, 2023
Stalwart Dull Apr 2023
How lucky I feel to live for real,
melancholia that is hard to reveal
imagine.scribble. gives me chill
Live in austerity, an innocuous thrill

How lovely I feel to have this pen in my hand
you wanna look inside of me, and watch me write?
See it in a different point of view
Cause you only got one side of me, and nothin's new

Shocking to feel a positive charge
Unusual sensation in my heart
you wanna look inside of me, and watch me write?
Don't be surprised with a big invisible spark.
Stalwart Dull Apr 2023
I don't know where to find myself,
Not lying on the bed, nor reading a book on the shelf.
This is all what I can think of searching
Maybe I lost it, and be permanently missing.
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