I know what it's like to wake up every morning
Wishing you hadn't.
I've pressed the blade to my skin,
Stockpiled on pills,
Written so many notes
Explaining how much it hurts
And how I'm not strong enough
And how I'm so ******* sorry for giving up.
You talk about it so casually,
Like losing you wouldn't tear me apart,
Or drive me to that point myself.
I know what it's like.
I've been there,
And sometimes,
Sometimes I still feel that sadness,
The kind that fills your soul and consumes you.
There is a difference between us, though.
I fight the sadness,
I fight for my life.
You let it snake it's arms around you,
Choke you until there's nothing left,
And then have the nerve
To talk to me like I don't understand,
Like I haven't been there.
Well, I do understand.
I understand that you are the love of my life
And that with each passing day
I am losing another piece of you to the sadness.
I want to save you,
To put your broken pieces back together,
But I can't.
I'm just hurting myself in the process.
You're a time bomb.
I can't be around when you explode.