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Char Jan 18
have you ever loved someone so deep
you forgive them
for breaking you
and still —
wish them the best?
Have you?
  Nov 2018 Char
You're in love with her.
She's the kind of soft that makes the sun fall to its knees every evening just to get a closer glimpse.
She's everything that makes a boy believe in god.
How else could he be alive at the same time as her if he didn't?
The odds are too great for there to be any other reason that he gets to make her smile.
That kind of smile that's designed to melt boys like him that i've turned cold.
You thought I was her once.
Speaking of thoughts, do I ever cross your mind sometimes like you cross mine? Even if unintentional?
At night I accidentally love you like no time has passed.
I know it's just my unconscious mind, but while I sleep there's a version of you that loves me still.
You're a dream that I wish wasn't.
So it's the worst kind of accident you could say.
Maybe not accidental if gods real like you believe he is.
My dreams might possibly just be his way of saying "*******".
Char Nov 2018
Thank you
my dear,
for the love you gave me,
for caring about me
for trying your best
and teaching me to appreciate the little things in life

I'm sorry
I was so stuck in a forest
with a broken compass,
that the shadows of the forest
clawed out from the darkness
into the abyss of my soul

Now that the wind has left behind the dust; our memories,
have I realized
how careless my words have made you felt
and the branches; my heart
snaps and howls into the wind,
with these thoughts of regret.

I still miss you and wished
"if only..."
It's true that you don't realize things until you loose that person/out of a dark situation. I left "if only" as an open ended statement since there could be so many things that could be said with "if only.." (e.g. if only I was more self aware, if only I didn't say those words etc etc.) I know sorry wouldn't help but from the bottom of my heart, I'm sorry for hurting you the way I never wanted to.
Char Oct 2018
You described
I was
a steamy heater in a cruel blizzard,
that blankets the falling snow with
a warm fuzzy hug

You described
I was
scorching fire
that last marathons
as this feeling you hold
felt like nothing you've felt before
first para- the kindness he felt from me in his heart
2nd para- his feelings/passion/how i motivate him
Char Oct 2018
watched in her cage with blazing eyes,
a casket was hidden
with hurt and blame
within the hearts of two

She braced
the words and actions of callousness,
the usual,

he flamed a stem of anger
in her patient heart
and carved collected wounds
in her bleeding heart,
cloaking her sunlight
within a kaleidoscope

With every fight,
their heart spoke like titanic ships,
screaming chords from broken strings
in sunken seas

with every fight,
she poured her heart and soul to him (once more),
bearing her heart
with unscripted honesty,
reflected in apologies and thought.

with his words spoken,
"I love you. We will fix this,"
tears stream down,
but she wonders if the truth is faded
with empty promises,
no action
But for now, I will keep believing in him.
P.S. Critiques on how to improve this would be greatly appreciated! i think i stumbled at the end and it's probably quite confusing
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