8 months
That's how long its been since you last spoke to me
I don't miss your name flashing on my screen anymore
Or the sound of your voice next to my ear

But the memories we made
The happiness I felt
That's what snatches fulfillment out of my hands

8 months*
That's how long I've associated your name
With the feeling of worthlessness

im drifting in and out
floating around
this body does not belong to me

the clench of my hands
physical touch
its all so distant
this body does not contain me

my vision blurs
voices fade
this body is not helping me

the clothes i put on
hats i wear
the glasses that rest on my nose
this body does not represent me

staring in mirrors
clawing at skin
this body will be the death of me

it's pounding, thumping
screams rumbling, but unheard
darkness eats the light she is seeking
unable to talk, move, think
why is this back again?
slit, slit, slit, slit, slit
she doesn't want to
but how could she escape?
"help me" are words that are tied
everything was senseless
no one lends, no one hears
depressed she is again

*help me