Narcolepsy* hard and heavy watch me fall asleep
Lulled to bed in a cunning thread of the tangled web we weave
I dream in pristine colors, windows of my mind anew
No fingerprints or ***** looks or evidence of you
I find comfort in forever wherever it may be
I may have left my home but it will always stay with me
The smell of all the smoke with the sound of all the rain
On constant playback every second deep within my brain
I found that time is all that matters and everything else faded
I spent years and years learning how to forget everything I hated
I've only gotten older and have nothing left to show
Except a ringing alarm clock and blood on my pillow
Narcolepsy** hard and heavy watch me as I sleep
Another pill, another high, another date to keep
If I shall die before I wake, I hope that I'm with you
Then it won't matter where I go, cause you will see me through
Will somebody please
Slow down the train
It's going through hills
And rough terrain
I tried to be the engineer
But that didn't work
This much is clear
I can't run, I can't roam
I can't DO LIFE ON MY OWN.
I'm on a ride that I can't bear
Filled with loneliness... despair
Not knowing how, which way to turn
I will go the way I've learned.
I won't harbor hatred in my heart
I know my love and I must part
But I don't think of him as bad
We've broken up, and that is sad
But I want my family
here on this site
Know that lately
I haven't been right...
My mind is distraught
I can hardly follow
My train of thought
Please forgive me
I'm slipping my gears
I'm haunted by fears
Have counted years
I'm sure sorry this affects you
It seems like I'm untrue
I want all poets here on HP
To very kindly PRAY FOR ME.
SEND GOOD THOUGHTS
In your own way.
I will also be in prayer
For I have now met The Engineer
Because of a broken heart
My brain has been affected
Some people here know that
I am mentally handicapped.
I am dealing with a brain dysfunction
And stress causes me to disassociate
I was severely damaged as a child
I don't use this as an excuse
But as an explanation
I never know from one day to the next what my mood or even my
Personality will be.
I have friends who I have not
Talked to in a while here
I DO LOVE YOU ALL !!!!!!
Poetry saved my life when
i thought things were not
going right. I started writing
when a beautiful man came
into my life. Found a pen in
the bottom of the puddle i
made with my tears. I sat
there for hours. Drank my
wine and walked into the
water made by own eyes.
Should i drown or should i
die i said. Felt a pen under
my feet and thought about
the guy i met. Wrote poetry
on the surface if the water.
I felt oxygen enter my lungs
and the water becoming
shallow I felt my poetry lifting
me up. I wrote my way out
of the deep puddle i cried.
I wrote my way out for him.
Starting with his name and the
details on his skin. Starting
with how i tripped into his
heart while running away from
my own hell. All it took me to
save my life was a pen and a
guy. That's when i decided to
take the goodbyes i said to life
back again. I want to exist. To
marry him. To fight for my rights.
I want to write until i die. And
if the ink in my pen ever dries
i'll use my blood instead and
the tears i cried. I want to turn
my pain into pride. I want to paint
my scars up in the sky* ~
In your eyes I watched fireflies dancing
I listen a song within my heart,
shredded, broken, whispers......
listening the music of falling leaves
to night, it rains with thunder, being alone is quite different
from being lonely
love forever means an empty room
In your eyes I find lost manuscripts
of my poems........
(C) asoke kumar mitra, april 6, 2015 :22.03 India, Kolkata.
can read your eyes, I find my poems there......
Please don't wrap your words around her
direct them straight to her heart
point them in her direction
bounce them off each shining star
She'll beg you not to mention
words of longing or of lust
enticing her to look your way
words wrapped in cotton wool and trust
Never write words for a woman
as she'll take them to her soul
breathing them in like air
not noticing she's about to fall
Her heart is so very fragile
feelings, just ready to explode
fraying quickly around the edges
when she reads your first 'Hello'
Daniel Bedingfield inspired
Fold me like a paper
plane. Teach me how
to face the wild winds
and heavy rain. Write
me love letters on both
of my pretty wings. Stamp
my metal body with the
initials of your name* ~