Look at how wonderful life can be
everyone seems to tell me
i cant blame them, its my own teaching
i wonder if they know its lies im preaching.

I dont feel happy, stuck in this flat
but of course i dont tell them that.
I tell them to fight with every last breath
I wonder if they know how much i want to embrace death.

I'm so trapped in whats supposed to be a normal life
with a nice flat, destined to become someones wife
with a few kids and a picket fence
I wonder if he knows that for me it would all just be pretence.

I just want to run away
Chase the sunset on a harley everyday.
Stop all the charade of a happy mandy
I wonder if i'll ever feel free.

I haven't been here a lot, I chose to escape this world for a while,
so I could control the feelings of hate behind my smile.
I was hurt in this world so into my daydreams I ran away,
in the shadow of the trees I hid from the harsh light of the day.

Whilst I was gone did you miss me?
Or was I just another forgotten memory?
Did my face haunt your worst nightmares?
Or did you think 'Shes gone but who cares?'

I hate this world I have ventured back too
I gave up all the fantasies and dreams to be with you.
But why should you care you ask? It's not your life thats dying,
At night in bed it's not you that is crying

I paint a plastic smile on my face whenever you're near,
and I pour sweet idolizing words in your ear.
I let you treat me like a slave because then at least I'm noticed by you,
but yet still you'll only be happy on the day my lips turn blue.

Mr Peeler, Mr Peeler, why do you creep into my room at night,
and feed nightmares into my brain to give me such a fright?
Didnt your mommy ever tell you its naughty
to scare a little girl like me?

Mr Peeler, Mr Peeler, why do you hide in the shadows of my room
and why is there a stench of doom?
Why, once you've pulled my eyelids from my face,
do you run away as if you are in disgrace?

Mr Peeler why, with my eyelids did you make pretty butterflies
once you had ripped them from my eyes?
Why mr peeler did you have to be so cruel
and never let me sleep at all?

---------------------------------------------------------------­-------------------------------------------

I thought I was past it, the horror and the lies,
the hurt,the pain, all the things that made me cry.
I thought I could take the humilation of bullying jibes
and still want to be alive

But last night you tore open the wounds, made me bleed
and gave me more scars that I dont need.
The pain you inflicted caused more damage then you'll ever know,
maybe to escape soon into the ground i'll go.

Your insults didnt just create new wounds you know,
but also opened up the old scars I never show.
but I geuss you just dont really care,
because you never like to play fair.

Now I'm fighting hard to stay sane,
and trying to ignore my pain.
Somewhere along the way I lost my will to survive,
now I really dont want to be alive.

I hear the laughter and the rounds of applause.
Why did no one tell me there was no get out clause?
Everyones cheering because I've saved the day.
I smile graciously but I really want to say:

I'm not a hero even though I rescued you.
Helping people is just something I tend to do.
Although I'm superhuman, I am allowed to make a mistake.
I'm just so normal that sometimes I feel like a fake.

Dont look to me when you need to be strong,
or when your life starts to go wrong.
Remember this, its something I want you to know.
I'm just a girl, you're the real hero.

'O' piteous hate,
'O' hateful pity.
Watch as chaos ruins the city.

Watch as I,
with gun held high,
Shoot my lover between the eyes,
and smile as he dies.

It’s a Saturday night and yet again,
you walk in and act the same.
Coz you’ve been drinking as I can tell,
I'm surprised you’re not locked in a police cell.

Good old Jack other people say,
he’s the life of the party every single day.
He can drink us all to the floor,
I wish they could see you when you walk through the door.

Every day you get mad because we’ve got no whiskey,
then you start to take it out on me.
You never really seem to care,
that you’re a drunk and you’re asleep on the stairs.

I try so hard to help you to bed,
and my reward is for you to punch me in the head.
So tonight once you’ve lay down to rest,
I’ll just go **** myself, its for the best.

And the next day when you’re more sober,
And go to the bathroom to fight your hangover.
You’ll see my body on the bathroom floor,
I’ve got about 10 minutes to live and then I'm no more.

You’ll hold me so close as I lie down to die,
'Please don't leave me' you’ll say as you start to cry.
I promise i'll change, I wont ever hurt you again,
my reply? 'its too late now, you caused me pain.'

So now as I draw my last breath,
and start to wonder if there’s life after death.
I look for one last time at your face.
and with my last words I’ll say you’re a disgrace.

I see you in the corner crying all alone,
begging and pleading with me to come home.
Telling me you've missed me and that things have changed,
And that you'll never touch alcohol again.

Although you swear you've changed I know you're telling lies,
you should learn to hide the evidnce better next time.
Because I can see empty whiskey botles on the floor,
and ***** on your shirt as well as a ***** stain by the door.

The ties to our relationship you've just managed to sever,
because you've not changed you've lost me forever.
So now as I walk away from you and everything that went wrong,
all I can do is sing this part of a good song:

'And you can cry all you want to I don't care how much you'll invest yourself in me
We're not working out'

Two wounded healers finally able to see,

he removed his blindfold same time as me.

Shot down, scarred and battle weary

still able to march on fearlessly.


Chasewater showed an answer we didn't expect,

and showed us a purpose we won't forget.

The purpose we didn't see, the one we couldn't believe,

awakened from the moment all hope began to leave.


We thought the night held a different surprise,

didn't realise it would open our eyes.

Call it an awakening, two heros come alive,

not given what we want but what we needed to survive

We have realised who we are to each other

and have learnt now that we are more than sister and brother



We are the angel on each others shoulder whispering keep going on

we are the crutch holding up one another keeping our friend strong

We are the sword and the shield, the key to the door

both of us defeated? Nevermore

Her arms are covered in ink,
doodles of barbaric things sprouting forth, like venus fly traps ready to pounce.
and words are branded on her arms like red scars.
Ink stains that scream hateful things

Not a single shred of skin is left untarnished
the ink is a cover up of her identity.
hiding her flesh with poisonous writing
the thoughts inside finally on show.

she covers her arms with long sleeve tops
to hide the hateful ink from the world
trying to keep some dignity of her own
yet still drawing childish hateful things on her arms

her face is blank, her eyes are emotionless
as she scrawls poetry and images on her arms till she draws blood.
she is just an emotionless zombie, an empty shell.
no longer existing in this world or belonging in it.

and thats how she'll always stay, forever here in body alone but never in mind or spirit. and always the unanswered question 'why do you do this to yourself?' floats around like an unrestful spirit.

I took my time,
To make things right.
But you just didn’t care.

You stole my heart,
Ripped it apart.
And I don’t think that’s fair.

Let the seven horned demon slap the *****,
that sinful temptress that leaves men dying on the floor.
Let the gates of hell be cast open wide,
and blood pour from every sinners side.

Come stand here at the divide between evil and good,
and be the human sacrifice that you know you should.
It's punishment for your poisonous lies,
the devils gonna enjoy scratching out your eyes.

The flaming sword will burn your soul;
your heart is as black as coal.
Burn in hell ****, be the devils slave.
I hope you end your life in a shallow grave

You have just signed your death warrant in blood,
if I was able to **** you then I would.
I'd plunge my hand in your chest, rip out your heart
and cut out your tongue, you stupid ****.

I am nothing to you,
coz thats what you've made me.
I'm drowning in your hate,
why wont you save me?

Please all I want is your love,
I wont ask for more.
Please don't leave me here broken,
dying on the bathroom floor.

You wont look into my eyes,
not when you're talking to me.
Why wont you look into my face?
Are you scared of what you'll see?

I am just a monster to you,
in your eyes I am dead.
So I think I'm doing you a favor,
when I shoot myself in the head.

I am not a soldier
That will fight in your wars
I have enough scars,
I don’t need anymore.

So you can call me a f**king coward
And condemn me to hell
But remember that soon
The tale of your demise I’ll tell.

A soldier needs to fight their own wars
Whether that means losing their soul
I have to battle my own problems
And fight my war against cigarettes and alcohol ….
Oh and YOU.

why did you die?
why did you make me cry?
why is your blood splattered on the wall?
why wont you hear me when I call?

My last breath was taken from me
yet it was you who was the one who died
you were a part of my destiny
your heart and mine were entwined.

you were my life
you and me were one
I'm broken and defeated
now that your gone.

i will never understand your suicide
as i stand in the bathroom where you died
and when i said I'm okay i know i lied
and this I'll prove as i take this cyanide

freedom comes with the highest price/i paid for my sanity with my blood

i once was a nice child
so innocent and kind
i was polite and friendly
the nicest girl you'd ever find

I'd clean up my room
and put all my toys away
I'd smile and be ecstatic
when grandma came to play

when mother came home
I'd give her a kiss
make her a cup of tea
and tell her she was missed

everything was brilliant
life was so great
until mother brought home a boyfriend
someone I'd grow to hate

u see he was friendly towards me
gave me gifts as well
but when no one was around
he made my life hell

now for the sake of my dignity
i will not say what he did to me
lets just say he caused me pain
and eventually almost drove me insane

so now to ease the terrible pain
i pick up my knife and slit open a vein
i bandage my wounds and lick up the blood
i know i shouldn't cut myself but the pain makes me feel good

and i know blood is a high price to pay
just to take my pain away
but at least when i watch my life drain away from me
i can heal myself for today and keep hold of my sanity

until the next day comes
and I'm left all alone
crying on the floor
in the place i call home

Because i lost the battle
i was trying to win
my demons beat me
so i gave in

and tomorrow mom when you get out of bed
thinking I'm asleep, sweet dreams filling my head.
you'll see blood on the sink and blood on the door
and me lying dead on the bathroom floor

And there will no suicide note to explain the reason why
I really felt like I had to die
although written on the wall and the mirror too
will be ' I'm a human not a zombie and i don't love you'

Load a gun
**** it back
go get drunk
Then dress in black

Write a note to say goodbye
Then shoot myself between the eyes.

I hate you
You hate me
We're a ****** up family

With a great big smack
and a kick from me to you
Wont you admit you hate me too?

Cigarettes and alcohol
and pictures of you
Lighters and money and coursework too.
I'm trying to forget but what can i do? When cigarettes and alcohol reminds me of you?