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alupa Oct 2020
Am I scared
outside
here
everywhere
Am I safe
inside
there
nowhere
Am I asking
today
now
anytime
Am I knowing
tomorrow
then
never
?
alupa Oct 2020
I coloured your soul.
Drew stripes
in blue and purple.
I painted your heart.
Covered it in silver splatters
I made you my finest art.
But I failed.
Just one small streak in the wrong direction
ruined my imagination.
So I scrunched up the paper
And pushed you away.
Why is nothing ever enough for me?
alupa Oct 2020
What am I going to do with all this future?
Without you in it...

What am I going to do with all these plans?

With all these places we wanted to visit
all these movies we wanted to watch
all these moments we wanted to share
all this future we wanted to live...
When there's no "we" anymore
alupa Sep 2020
Autumn is just so full of you.
The pale sun, the fading colours, the cold wind.
It's all the same and yet so different.
Autumn is where we met.
But you're not here anymore.
And I'm not the same anymore.

The trace you left in my mind is mirrored in the reality.
In the way I see things.
The way the trees sway as if they didn't want to stand any longer.
The way that faith crumbles to dust like the leaves on the ground.
The way the people walk by in a hurry.
It reminds me of you.

I see you in the way everything seems to be ending,
see us there.

Autumn was our favourite season.
But I think it ain't that anymore.
I guess it's a little messy.
alupa Sep 2020
Today I'll write one last letter.

One last letter to finally forget.
Because everything's over,
our future is set.

One last letter to softly let go
Because I am done,
feeling so low.

One last letter to gently forgive
Because that's the thing,
I need to live.

P.S I hope, that soon I'll feel better
but deep down I wish, this weren't my last letter.
alupa Sep 2020
You treated me like I were the moon
among a thousand stars
Like I were special

And in the end
you were right
I'm different than the others
I'm indeed a moon among stars

But you didn't understand what that means
I seem to shine brighter
but I don't

I just reflect their light
Just betray, just cheat
And if you looked into my eyes
you'd see that there's nothing shedding light
inside of me

Not a single star,
not even a candle

So don't look at me like I were the moon,
the most beautiful thing you've ever seen

Look at me like I were the moon,
the most pathetic thing, you've ever seen
alupa Aug 2020
Yesterday we talked and I realized
we aren't the soulmates that I wanted us to be
We grow neither at the same pace
nor in the same direction
Maybe we've been soulmates one day
But I guess we've outgrown each other
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