I love him
I tell myself
I know that
We will be together forever
I don’t believe that
We could be separated
My thoughts tell me that
He’s the love of my life
Sometimes my heart lies and says
I could live an eternity
Without him
Like my friends say
“We’re perfect for each other”
And you can’t tell me
He’s not the one.

Now read from bottom to top.

Yesterday
I thought about you.

    I remembered how excited you were
to see me; I remembered
    how happy you were
to see me those years before.
   Life's a little different now
but, that doesn't stop you -
    from reaching out,
letting me know that
    you're still there
and I feel your touch, I swear I do
    even when I know you're not there.
Right now, I'm afraid I'm all alone.
    It feels so different here.
Sometimes it hurts, sometimes too much
    without you being here.

Today
I miss you.

today, i woke up and the sun was shining
the birds are singing
people are laughing
but i can't enjoy it.

there is this feeling that is creeping from my toes as the light floods my room.
i feel worthless.
i feel exhausted.
there is no more fight left in me

i wake up like this most days now
but it's okay
even on these days where everything is unbearable and my skin is on fire
i know it can't last forever

today, i want to die
but i won't
because there's a chance that tomorrow i'll want to live.

she reads books and she plays music
the cute, innocent
clumsy girl
with freckles on her cheeks

you like to read and listen to music
the cool, handsome
sweet-talking man
who likes freckles on her cheeks

[ or at least you said you did ]

she rolls her eyes at your compliments
the cautious, bright
guarded girl
with curiosity in her eyes

you lay them on thick
the certain, sharp
imprudent man
with hidden agendas on your lips

she lingers a little longer
in hopes of crossing your path throughout the day

she laughs at your jokes
and you know they're not funny

she sings for you in the car because
you like her voice

[ or at least you said you did ]

she's become good at excuses
the hopeful, naive
kind-hearted girl
with sureness in her words

you soak them up
the stark, ill-intentioned
vacant boy
with uncertainty in your voice

she gave all she had to care for you,
the smooth, clever
self-serving boy

you convinced her that you loved her

[ or at least you said you did ]