Deep within my heart
lives love, there it is
cultivated and fed.
But my love is restless,
it is rooted in unstable
ground.
My foundation is neglected
by loves lacking embrace,
its touch hurts, brings
pain and scars.
My heart once had a dream
of being held and supported,
by a bond between two souls searching for love.
I was rudely awakened by
pain and heart break.
©️ 2021 By Amanda Shelton
I have been abused by a narcissistic boyfriend. I am still dealing with the damage. I have decided to no longer date nor have romantic relationships. I am not very good at being romantic. Also, I am damaged from passed abuse. I have had only three boyfriend's, they all were long term and ended because of the guys issues. I didn't expect to be dumped because they didn't tell me anything was wrong. The last boyfriend gaslighted me and made me feel crazy. He also made me feel ugly and insecure because he was jealous and complained about my makeup and everything I did. He accused me of cheating while he was doing drugs and breaking into my internet and devices. I don't trust anyone anymore to be honest with me. I've learned no one is honest. People are too busy trying to please themselves and trying to control everything. I am always on the side watching everyone behave like selfish robots seeking popularity. It's sad. I want to be with someone who is available and doesn't care about how much junk they can get. Just hangout and be with me. Tell me I am perfect just the way I am. Make me feel good about myself. Support my life by making me feel comfortable and confident in everything I do.