One day I will find someone that respects my kindness

And my time

And the little bit of ******* patience I save

Only for rainy days

I don’t think people realize how much love takes.
Its more than time, and a little patience and loyalty.
Love is a lifestyle.
Its how you talk,
how you walk down a street,
its how you live your life.
I have a talent for coming across broken hearts.
And I know I have the power to change all of that.
I can be there for you in the middle of the night when you can’t breathe
and you feel like everything around you is crashing.
I can cook you meals and rub your back.
I can love you to sleep and have you wake up to me stroking your hair, ready to give even more.
Show even more.
Guide you just a little bit more.
I'll be your friend,
your partner in crime,
your packmate,
your mother.
Anything you need.
But I can’t promise you forever.
They don’t realize that.
I can’t promise one day I won’t change my mind.
I can’t promise every day I'll look at you
like you’re the best thing thats ever happened to me.
I’ve broken more than one heart.
And I hate it.
What’s love if it isn’t forever?
Why give all of me in vain?
It will hurt you.
It will hurt me.
It will ruin friendships.
It will ruin memories
Good memories.
Great memories.
I’m doing you a favor, by saying no.
I will not love you.
I will not be there when you wake up.
I will not be there when you fall asleep.
Because I feel it deep down.
I know Im not your blessing, and you’re not mine.
So lets skip it.
The arguing.
The tears.
Lets mend our paper cuts and avoid the stitches
and the scars.
Because what is love
if it is not forever?

Sometimes

My heart shudders

And ripples in fear

And I imagine

Touching my stomach

For fear of what my future child

One day may have to endure

One day may have to see

One day may have to think

One day may have to feel …

I was too eager to be loved
Too eager to fill this space
Carved and conformed into the perfect place
To fit into another's hand
I was too eager
For heart eyes and butterflies
Those things I knew..
I knew they only existed in fairytales
I was way too eager
To take your words
and have them be reality
Not another chapter book
But a love song
Chopped and *******
My mood a reflection of only greater
things the future would bring
Not a ballad but an orchestra
Of strings and flutes
Bass chello and harps
Vibrating
Pounding out reverberated heart beats
In perfect synchronization
I was too eager
To give you things you didn't deserve
Because fate told me the here and now
Were all there was and now was the time
Now
Now I see
where I went wrong
I was too eager.

Guardian angel
I watch over you as you sleep
Now its my turn
In slumber
Trace the skies
Make your path
Always back to me
Waiting
Expectant
For your return to heaven
For your return to earth

I don't deserve
What you so willingly give
It's not mine to have
Too perfect for these hands
Scarred
Unsteady
I can't hold it anymore
What if you took it back
And one day
Give it away
To an artist
Who can mold
And clutch
And build
And I'll find a heart
Like mine
Flawed
Easier to hold
Similar to mine
But you keep mine
Take this part
Its yours
And when that artist
Smoothes her hands
over crumbled clay
Add my piece
And make it art
Make it beautiful