mis-measured the bed for the sheets and pillows
possibly on purpose
it's a king and proper fitting things would give her too much area to
wander away from me in sleep and I
so desire her near next right against me
a Freudian sheet?
Did I do it on purpose?
Three days now and we'll be together for the first time ever. I anticipate fret with should I trim my mustache and hair
change my toothpaste
floss cleaner
make the bed with one hospital corner?
which side should I leave uncovered
the left or right since
the queen sheets and bedspread cover only so much?
Should I clean the toilet again?
Try to write her a poem to give her when
she steps in our
efficiency apartment mansion
I picked the right woman
one who is into hearts and feelings instead
of fancy cars and nights out
cause I got planned
some long moonlight walks  maybe a
fire outside in a barrel we can sit 'round
drink a few
and watch the embers curl
as I sneak views of her sneaking peeks
and know yeps
she is my love
and later we
will go inside into the bed half covered and love then
snuggle all night and soon
the refrigerator will get here and
we'll have  somewhere to chill a spoon
and our beer
I can't wait for her
I feel wealthy and wise
I know she is mine!

I am in love with Autumn
(a scandalous affair, really),
Because, you see, Autumn
Is married to old man Winter.

Autumn, ever elegant, dons
Her best calico raiment
And dances and whirls
Across the mountains,
Shimmering orange, yellow, red.
The entire world bountiful underfoot.

Even the heavens are in love with her,
Giving her cobalt skies.
Kissing her lips with sunshine,
And caressing her cheeks with rain.

Her mouth a radiant sliver of the moon,
Teeth glinting like the stars above.
Life is her joy and so she dances
Before her jealous husband
Can secret her away.

The wind catches her hair,
Wishing it's turn to dance with her.
But, just for a season,
It's my turn.

taffylike I sat melting
in my blue jeans
as she took my hand
and we gulped
the last sips of our Black Jack
and chugged the dregs of our tall Buds
I was already there

We ended up on the beach
running barefooted
nothing but endlesses seemed to wave on the dark seas
as our breath ran out fell
together
like two seagulls
on a crust of bread

a part of me is still there
now
and the stars flicker and waves crash
again
when I am alone
not ever dimmed
by time
or her leaving

As I move along the line
Your absence will constantly remind
Me that you chose to stay
In that same destructive state
Rather than blossom into
A better person

You failed to realize
That in raising a child
You also have to grow
Up and outward to show
Them how to live
A life worth living

So absorbed in the me, me, me
Covered your eyes so you'd not see
That you let the monster in
Allowed it to eat your children
Until they became as poisoned
As your soul

From far away, a voice recalled
Me to the days gray, gone, and old
Dear mother tucked me in to bed
And warned me of the night ahead

Of the many monsters lying in wait
For an innocent child to bite the bait
From head to toe, they'd eat you whole
Skin and hair and bones and all

But daylight it was when uncle Strouss
Brought Teddy into his colorful house
His dad's brother helped him unbutton
While in the frame, Jesus looked on

And don't forget, it was a bright day
With Dianne there along the walkway
Wearing her shorts; the weather was hot
But those who saw her called her "****"

It was a good time, Lyda thought
To try out the new dress she bought
But men around her looked at her funny
Eyes all over her temple, her body

Mike went out for a drink with Sybill
He didn't know that drink had a little pill
The next day he woke up stark naked in bed
Beside the monster he thought was his friend

Among necktied men, Jenny sat busy
Focused on work for a 6-digit salary
But some monsters are pros too, chum
And he felt her up and left her mum

And as I tuck you in to bed, my child
I will tell you all this world is scary and wild
It is never safe for you and Teddy,
And Dianne and Lyda and Mike and Jenny

lately, all
of my
veils have
evaporated,

laying bare
once-hidden
vistas and
emotions,

leaving me
open and
vulnerable to
either being

loved by you,
or simply
vanishing into the
ether.

They found the shattered remains of my head and brain,
scattered around my bed in crystals and in grains,
shining red and white like broken candy canes,
Marked it down as evidence, A to Zed and back again.

Bring me back to breathing, today or tomorrow,
twenty hours of dreaming, nightmares of only sorrow.
Inevitable fall from grace, blood splattered on my face,
but a smile still shining when I turn down second place.

Rip out my changing eyes, I choose to go blind.
So many restless sighs, in this white noise mind.
Rip out my babbling tongue, the messages you will not find,
too many songs unsung, in this white noise mind.

You make the signs and I'll take direction,
keep feeding lines, it only increases infection.
I find my teeth to grind, biting down on affection,
that you tangle and bind, leave it in an unmarked section.

Take my burning ears, they listen far too kind.
So many haunting fears, in this white noise mind.
Take my shaking hands, they're locked and intertwined.
Nothing to understand, in this white noise mind.

I only see bright red stop lights,
they line my way, they trace my nights,
they always stay, don't leave my sight.

So take my silent heart, rib cage is too confined.
Rip all organs apart, leave behind a white noise mind.