I drown in the depths of your ocean
I hang from the noose of your words
I suffocate as you take the air I breathe
I am pale from your winter so absurd

I burn by the scorching heat of your dessert
I am lost in your maze of lies
I am scarred by the blade of your selfishness
And I am blinded by the beauty of your light

Faith. Hope. Love.
I don't have answers. I don't really know much.
But I know that those things ignite something in your heart, casting away the darkness of fear and regret.

When the cobwebs in the basement are cleared, you find all your old dreams hidden in corners you forgot about.

And when you pound your fist in the dirt, and say enough is enough... I'm not here to survive, I'm here to LIVE... to laugh and play and realize my deepest passions... to find the ocean of joy and invite everyone I know to swim in it with me. To love myself daringly; to dance with the darkness of my fears and invite their lessons in.

Something doesn't have to change. Everything has to change.
I'm not interested in being right anymore.
I'm interested in being ALIVE.

When you commit these things to yourself, and fight for love, for hope, for the adventure of really living all the way... something happens.

Something flips inside you, and heaven begins pounding at your door.

Life has always waited patiently on you to stop waiting patiently.

Adventure isn't around the corner. It's hiding underneath your heart.

Right here. Right now.

I wish I could write something beautiful,
But the only words I can manage
Are ‘drowning’ and ‘suffocating’,
And we all know there’s no beauty in death.

My body is a fresh canvas just waiting to be filled,
But I have filled it in the wrong way --
Ruining it with cuts, scratches, and burns;
Nothing beautiful or something to be shown off.

In my drawer is a piece of paper,
But I have never written on it.
I am waiting for the day my courage is high,
And I finally need it to write my suicide note.

The life I live isn’t a bad one,
But my past still haunts me.
No amount of faith will diminish the feelings --
The sadness, guilt, anger.

I’ve lived on a roller coaster ride,
But everything comes to an end.
This one will crash and burn
And never be heard of again.

This poem isn’t meant to be beautiful,
But it is supposed to make you think.
Tonight might be the night
I remove the blank paper from the drawer.