Too many people I've met
Use me as a mediatory point
As some stepping stone to heaven
They climb the rungs of my spine
Like steps to the pearly gates

I am not here to absolve you
I am not some merciful god
You can’t wring forgiveness from me
Like blood from a stone

I am not here to cleanse you
I won’t sweep dirt from your skin
Like some almighty wave -  
If you want my ocean
You will have to drown for it.

Let the rain kiss you.
Let the rain beat upon your head with silver liquid drops.
Let the rain sing you a lullaby.

The rain makes still pools on the sidewalk.
The rain makes running pools in the gutter.
The rain plays a little sleep-song on our roof at night—

And I love the rain.

You are a real woman
who only in tales found,
deserving the happiness,
and you are still alone.
So, this makes me feel proud.

It stands for that - except me,
no one has eyes keen enough,
either feelings profound
to perceive your inner light,
to love unique beauty.

I instantly fell in you
in the first moment we met.
Sometimes I am confused,
how many sillies there are
around haven't seen you yet.

My mind was darkly resisting in despair,
Do not deem that I had been simply ingrate.
It was because your loss was always very near
And you were too generous even when you left.

You left for me here some memories of you,
A fabulous impromptu to feel you all the time.
Bestowed the crucial drive of being myself
And left inside - deepest - a bit meaning of life...

You are the lovely girl of a joyful family,
The love surrounded you let you be merciful,
But I had been on the battle side of this life
Fighting hard before all became remorseful

I sacrificed with my own hands the last solution,
You know, when you are hurt, I do not bare
Yet I am distracted by your delusion
And the peace of mind I can't find anywhere

Little feet trampling across the floor
Little hands swinging thru the air
Little voices raising as the adventure unfolds
Little eyes bright with beginnings

I was certain of the world with little feet, little hands, a little voice, and little eyes.

The world I believed in with just a little hope.

I never leave
I never go outside anymore
I barely hangout with friends
I barely go to class

Will this dark cloud leave me
Will I ever feel normal again
What have I done to deserve this
What do my friends think of me

No matter how much I try
No matter what I do
I can't get out of this darkness
I can't wake up from this nightmare

The darker I grow
The darker my thoughts become
Am I worth anything to anyone
Am I worth anything at all

(On a line from Mandelstam - 'I have learned the science of parting')

There was so much we never did together,
places to go and visit hand in hand,
so much we could have learned about each other,
so many things to say before goodbye.

Nobody ever knew how much I suffered;
but by applying all the skills I'd learned
I always coped. My strategies were successful;
the ache of separation always eased.

So many times the same has happened to me,
but every time the pain returns anew.
Just as intense, although it's so familiar,
regret comes like a band around my heart.

Falling in love, each time's a new experience;
the same thing goes for learning how to part.