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 Nov 2019 Alina
donnie
poison(ed)
 Nov 2019 Alina
donnie
every night i softly cry
eat an apple, hope to die
you've left me here, so red and flushed
im waiting for you, but i feel rushed
the bleeding heart slips from my grasp
i run to catch it in a dash
but only you can break its fall
and as it hits, I slowly crawl
to you.
adieu.
goodbye,
sweet lie.
 Nov 2019 Alina
lena k
"no."
 Nov 2019 Alina
lena k
you stole my light
when i told you to stop
and you ignored my red light
and kept going
like my body was undiscovered land
and you were a colonizer.
perhaps my asking you to stop
turned you on
made you hungry.
you looked at me with your hungry eyes
like i was fresh meat
for you to take and have for yourself
ignoring my stop signs
cries
screams
because i am nothing more
than an object to you
made for your manipulation and pleasures.
consent is key
 Nov 2019 Alina
Aleister Crowley
I bring ye wine from above,
From the vats of the storied sun;
For every one of yer love,
And life for every one.
Ye shall dance on hill and level;
Ye shall sing in hollow and height
In the festal mystical revel,
The rapurous Bacchanal rite!
The rocks and trees are yours,
And the waters under the hill,
By the might of that which endures,
The holy heaven of will!
I kindle a flame like a torrent
To rush from star to star;
Your hair as a comet’s horrent,
Ye shall see things as they are!
I lift the mask of matter;
I open the heart of man;
For I am of force to shatter
The cast that hideth -Pan!
Your loves shall lap up slaughter,
And dabbled with roses of blood
Each desperate darling daughter
Shall swim in the fervid flood.
I bring ye laughter and tears,
The kisses that foam and bleed,
The joys of a million years,
The flowers that bear no seed.
My life is bitter and sterile,
Its flame is a wandering star.
Ye shall pass in pleasure and peril
Across the mystic bar
That is set for wrath and weeping
Against the children of earth;
But ye in singing and sleeping
Shall pass in measure and mirth!
I lift my wand and wave you
Through hill to hill of delight :
My rosy rivers lave you
In innermost lustral light..
I lead you, lord of the maze,
In the darkness free of the sun;
In spite of the spite that is day’s
We are wed, we are wild, we are one.
 Nov 2019 Alina
Thoughtful
thoughts are stars that collide together and shoot hot fumes
thoughts are the unseen side of the moon
thoughts are the miscellaneous objects held in the hands of gravity
thoughts are discovered constellations
 Nov 2019 Alina
Deepsha
Accident
 Nov 2019 Alina
Deepsha
Screeeeeeeechhh!
Thud!
Silence!
Hearts stopped
Faces turned
Jaws dropped
Prayers began

He left his assembled bricks and wood and furniture
and ran
ran towards the sunset
with nothing
but his silhouette following him
even years later
it felt like yesterday
possessed
he ran as fast as he could

Prayers began
blurry shapes hoarded around the car
his eyes refused to close
against the horror
of what lay beside
his high crushed
into water
his delusion failed him
his brain froze

He ran as fast as he could
to the beach
wanting to walk into the water
wanting to stop breathing
seeking unfathomable peace
that final peace

His brain froze
get out of the car
people shouted
was a life lost
he didn’t dare to find out
he just wanted
a few seconds back
just a few
seconds
back
please

That final peace
eluded him
waves silenced
by his cornucopia of emotions
his eyes now refused to open
the saltiness of the beach
was overcome
by tears
that flowed in secrecy
inflaming everything within reach
embracing his cheeks
toying with his lips

Please
callanambulance
sheisbleeding
somebody
tieyourshirta­roundherbleedinghead
isittoolate
is it too late

Toying with his lips
tears turning into questions
could I ever forgive myself
his sobbing heart
didn't acknowledge the question
it just faded
he lived
with himself
he died within

Is it too late
his wife asked
holding his hands
breathing heavily
her eyes averred
every moment that they shared
their feuds
their make ups
their teasing
their loving
her eyes were done speaking
and now they rested

He died within
wailing like a baby
he slept there
with parched eyes
reminiscing her parting words
etched in his heart
etched so deep
that it bled internally
bled and ached
to release a shriek through muteness
muteness, deafening
deafening his emotions
making them oblivious to his existence
his fists clenching
the vacuum of solitude
the moon and waves began their tango
and the water rose
higher and higher
embracing him within
maimed to be saved
releasing a gushing hymn
for she was now deemed
forever with him.
It was either whole or just the last, I'm still confused. But didn't feel like throwing away what I started with however bad or elaborate the start felt. (silly attachments)
 Nov 2019 Alina
Ellie
No one wants to play with us anymore
We sit idly on swinging swings, unforeseen to anyone or anything
We used to play here with all the other kids
But eventually we got stuck in between
Now we just have to play with abandonment and some trees
Life never stops
 Nov 2019 Alina
Ellie
What have I?
 Nov 2019 Alina
Ellie
It feels childish at times
Me, trying to coherently express
What I have felt
In lines, in stanzas, in rhymes
It feels all too futile sometimes
To think that I have to say something
That others have already said
Whyyyy do I do this to myself
 Nov 2019 Alina
Ellie
Fickle Faith
 Nov 2019 Alina
Ellie
She had put her faith into you
You held her trust in your hands
And every so often
You'd squeeze and tug
To see how far you could get
Before breaking her completely
Trying to switch things up.
 Nov 2019 Alina
Ellie
I still think of you sometimes
And
Occasionally
Tears are brought to my eyes
Because of what you did
I can never see you
As anything
Not even a friend
It feels weird sometimes
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