There is something calm about watching the stars
Each light quivers, as if to whisper directly to the heart
"It's okay" it says "I am here for you"
And at that moment everything seems right
With each inhale the world feels more interconnected than ever
Followed by an exhale that releases infinite gratitude for the moment
For at some point we all are a miniature entity
Heavy on the ground, enveloped by the stars

Drunk tonight
Intoxicated tomorrow
Is it because my days are filled with sorrow?

Trapped in a whirlwind
I cannot even explain
It is like no one even knows my name

I want to feel wanted
But not that fake ****
In that amazing way that makes you feel lit

Not that one-night-stand wanted
Actually wanted, actually loved
I'm done until I am not done

It's a circular game
Life.
a ****** up cycle of positive and negative feelings
Canceling eachother out

What is this
How is this
i want to feel wanted again

i am drunk tonight
i'll be drunk tomorrow
i'm content but I am not
do i even deserve to feel sorrow?

in an attempt to fit a square
into a circle
she shed her skin
rearranged her face
into something you'd look at
she chose her words carefully
saying things you want to hear
she colored her hair white
but her soul remained
as black as the night

Mixed emotions
Unclear notions
I'm in roller coaster mode
Do I hold on?
Or do I simply just let go?
Honestly, I don't know
I'm not 100% sure of who I am
I'm growing, still learning
And constantly yearning
For a deeper understanding
Of this womanhood business
It's a very complicated existence
For instance

Society describes what a woman should be
So faintly
All of the descriptions I hear are nothing at all like me
And since I don't quite understand what I should be
When I make mistakes on my womanhood journey
Society ridicules me
But why? I don't know what I'm doing
And since I don't, shouldn't someone show me?

How should I conduct myself?
Why hasn't anyone prepared me for this womanhood test?
Society shouldn't just expect
That I should already know how to be
Independent, submissive, loyal, loving and trustworthy
Especially if no one took the time out to show me
I only had society to mold me
And clearly
Society doesn't know what a real woman should be
I couldn't learn how from TV
Those people, those images are nothing but deceit

So what's a girl to believe?
Oh, society you don't know either?
Fine, well when you find out
Maybe you should teach me

I never used to believe it.
Pennys that bring good luck.
Black cats that make you weep.
Something about mirrors.

But now.

Now I understand it.
Because dreams, and wishes, and all the other *******.
It's real.
And crazy thing is..
I've experienced it.

Maybe it was a completely backwards way.
And maybe whoevers in charge of all that crap got confused.
But I found you.
And you weren't exactly who I had in mind.
But you seem to be better than what I thought I deserved.

So now I make 11.11 wishes.
And I pick up those ***** coins and count to 3 and make a wish.
And I don't try smash mirrors anymore.
You've shown me love is real.
That movie. Heartfelt. Real love.