Everyday I wear a smile,
Paint on a happy face,
And slip on a coat of confidence
That only I know doesn't really exist.
I pretend to remember the good times,
Ignore the bad times if need be,
And wash my hands of all the pain
That constantly eats away at my reserves.
Only I can see the tears that were cried,
The blood that was spilled,
And the lesions that had formed
From the cuts on my battered soul,
But I can't afford to let others
See the aching inside of me
Because if there's one thing I can't take,
It's the pity of those who've suffered greater.
Then I meet those who haven't known a single trial.
Who go through life oblivious to the hurt
That haunts me everyday.
I long to be naive and innocent,
But its one thing that I cannot
And never will be able to obtain.
So I wear my facade,
Determined not to let it show,
And when the wounds I hide,
Manage to ooze past the walls that I have built,
I **** it back in and pretend it never happened
And everyone goes back to their regular routine.
Every day of my life is a lie,
Because I refuse to let anyone see how much I hurt.
They wouldn't understand,
Nor would they truly care about it.
So I just wear a smile,
Paint on a happy face,
And slip on a coat of confidence
That I know will never really be mine.
Thank you.