We sat in the back because all of this was new to us
There was a lot of people but the room was somehow still hushed
People kept entering from different sides of the room
We all stay quiet and hushed but you can still hear the cars outside going zoom
We don't know the real reason as to why we decided to come here
But honestly I think we are always searching for distractions to cover up our fears
We've done a lot bad but not a whole lot of good
But we keep living life hoping that one day we'll be understood
We've smoked this and drank that but it's getting kind of old
And we've grown into a habit of doing the opposite of what we're told
We've been wanting to end all this pain and depression for awhile
But at the end of each day we still somehow find a reason to still smile
The people around us think we are pretty confident and tough
But little do they know that we are on the verge of giving up
But we continue to keep living this lie because the one thing we're not is selfish
So we keep living our life for the sake of the people around us even though deep down we feel helpless
But we don't wanna hurt the people around us , we'd just rather hurt ourselves
So we'll just keep pretending that we're happy, even though deep down we're just empty shelves

With different views comes different perceptions
Where you might see "sin" , I see something beautiful
Where I see something is right, but you may see it as wrong
We're just creating unnecessary drama instead of focusing on getting along
Why can't we accept each other for who we are
Then maybe they'll be less lonely people out at the bar
If someone is feeling lonely , it's most likely because there scared to live the life they wanna live,
Because people like to judge and take away happiness instead of give
I'm beginning to think the world I live in loves living in chaos
We have created an atmosphere where people have to fight everyday to be someone there not
I'm waiting for the day when everyone realizes who they truly are
And soon that day will come when we join our loved ones in the stars
Im tired of feeling lonely , I'm tired of living alone
Yea this house may be full but it still don't feel like home
Home is usually the one place you can truly be yourself
But that's not the case for me , I'm still searching for my true identity
And I'm sick and tired of the people around me trying to predict my destiny
I'm sitting here thinking why can't you just focus on you
Because you have your own life just like I have mine too

I'm so quick to get up and walk away
I often don't like what others have to say
I try to sit and talk things thru
But you don't really know me, just like I don't really know you
Life can be fun and life can be hard
But at the end of each day I continue to fall apart
Crying myself to sleep,
Wake up, then often eat
Keep this cycle going
Cause this internal battle keeps on rolling
I'm running out of time
But I don't care , cause my crush will never be mine
At this point I don't give a ****
There's no doubt I'm running out of luck
Please take me now I'm ready
No need to do it slow and steady
I want this pain to end
And then hopefully I won't have to deal with it again

It was fun for a while, but the fun just started to seem like everyone was covering up the empty feelings
But in the meantime I was thinking this was going to be the beginning of my healing
Somewhere deep down in my black heart of a soul
Are years of built up anger and untold secrets that have yet to unfold
I've started bad habits to keep all these feelings under control,
But keeping all this in, is just getting really old
I've tried counseling I've tried talking it out, but I still end up back to the same bad habits
They try to preach that cheesy **** saying my good days are so close i can almost grab it
Dang
Im just sitting here thinking things will never change
And that I'll continue to stay the same
Angry , unwanted , and often forgotten
Just someone on the side lines, who is not seen playing with others often
People like to pretend like they care ,
But then are often never there
Where was everyone in that tragic hour
I guess it was just easier to send some flowers
It's times like these when you start to build hate for people
When they pull **** like this, there intentions for being your friend just seem evil
Yea to you this statement might seem overly dramatic
But seriously where the **** was everyone when my family was in a confused panic
M. mother ******* I. A.
That's where the **** y'all were
Just going about your day , while we're crying for HER
But it's cool I knew know one would be there
Cause I've noticed that people are really bad at pretending to care
So Yes I am Angry and yes I feel unwanted and forgotten, and yes I will stay sitting on the sidelines because I refuse to play with souls that are ******* rotten

I look around

I listen to all the sounds

I hear small talk laughing and crying

Everyone around me seems to be dying

Their loved ones are near

Whispering in their ears

Its gonna be alright, everything is going to be ok

But they don't know the emotional and physical pain they deal wit day to day

People send their "get wells" and flimsy flowers

But the clock keeps ticking, it could be any hour

The room is gloomy and silent

Although the flowers are vibrant

Family and friends come from all around

But they just stand there and don't even make a sound

I try to stay strong

But I have been dealing with this for too long

I'm tired of feeling all this hurt

It feels like my world has crashed and burned

The time has come

There life is done

In heaven Rest in Peace

Now all that's left are memories

And they treasures that we keep

It was sad to see them go

But there's something I'll always know

The kindness that they shared

And how they always cared

They were a blessing to be near

With them I had no fears

Although it was a tragedy

I wont let the pain get to me

Every time I think of them tears fill my eyes

The only time I see them is in my dreams at night

Even though there dead and gone

I know my life will still go on

We were lost souls living in a town the  world  around us didn't knew exist
Longing that one day we would be found and accepted by this world around us
But we learned that there is no such thing as a world who didn't judge you for who you truly are and what you believed in
As for me I feel like I am not living
Yes I might be breathing and yes I might be physically here
But am I really living life if I'm constantly living in fear?
I can't like who I wanna like or be who I truly want to be, without everyone judging and then abandoning me
Abandoned
That's the last thing I want
That's why I go about my life pretending to be something I'm not
But that's the only thing I know how to do
I'd do just about anything to here the next "I love you too"
But what is love
They say love has no limits
But I can't love her because only men can love women?
Ok pause
This is what makes me not want to live at all
I have to hide what I truly feel as if it's not ******* real
Because people will leave me
Abandoned
That's the last thing I want
So I'll keep doing what I'm doing and shrug this life off

Two completely different souls
Two completely different beings
But here we are laying next to each other still living
Unloved, unwanted and alone
Wishing we could call some solid place home
But people always ignore us while their "living" there life day to day
Not even wondering if we're even doing ok
You keep looking at me and I keep looking at you
But we both know there can never be any sort of "love" between us two
As your eyes are locked on mine
It's literally like were frozen in time
As time froze our minds froze
No more depression, anxiety, or unhappy nature in that moment
And we don't want this moment to end
We're forever wishing that we could just play pretend
But every happy moment for us always eventually seems to end
So we just keep "living" in this ****** up cycle that just keeps on happening over and over again
And as I close my eyes
I wish this whole "life" thing would just end

I just wanted to say I'm sorry
I should have participated at your party
But I was upstairs instead
Laughing it up with friends hoping this would all get out of my head
At first it didn't seem real
But your presence was now gone at every meal
All this time I've tried to stay strong
Going about my life and pretending all along
But truth is this has always been killing me inside
But my feelings is something I try to often hide
I just wanted to say I'm sorry for all the things I've done
And that I truly forgive you too, so therefore the devil has not won
Even though I'll always regret not doing this when you were here
I know your looking down with a smile from ear to ear
I should have never taken one moment for granted
But that's something I can't change
So now I hope to go forward
And never make that same mistake
I love and miss you
And hope you miss me too
One day we will reunite again
So please wish me luck until then