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 Apr 2016 Dev
angel homes
I hear what I want,
I say what I want,
sometimes I do to much,
most often I do to much,
but when I do something that might,
help it comes and haunts me.......
 Apr 2016 Dev
Eliza
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 Apr 2016 Dev
Eliza
-
I forgot
How the pen felt
Underneath my fingers.
 Apr 2016 Dev
Eliza
Lights
 Apr 2016 Dev
Eliza
I see the lights and wonder,
"Would I have seen them any different
If you did not exist?"
I used to see them even from afar,
Admire and compare them to stars,
I may have written a poem or two
Of how
When I see the lights,
I think of you.
But now
After everything we've been through
I see them as a constant reminder
That lights can go off any second
And leave you in the dark.
Just like how the day gives way to the night
And waits until it needs to give light
The only difference is
I waited but you never came back.
 Apr 2016 Dev
Eliza
The stillness amuses me
The stopping of time
A moment of your own-
on your own.

Trapped within the white walls
Of a place for the sick
A place for the sick?
I already died.

I killed myself inside-
A long time ago.
The pretty red liquid flows
Invisible to the eye
I killed myself inside.

Tempted but scared
To pick the last petal
Of the bleeding rose.

So I looked for other flowers
To preoccupy my mind
"Think happy thoughts"
Is what they say
As I greedily and desperately gasped for air
And wished for the numbing sensation to subside.

All I want is an escape
To never think at all
Think of happy thoughts, you say?
The happy thoughts were my downfall.
 Apr 2016 Dev
hadley
fingertips to wrist
i resist the urge reach out
he's an arm's length away
but completely unreachable
everything about you is so ******* inaccessible
i wish that i could find the words
my insides are tar and lavender
sweet enough, but so tenaciously anchored
that i couldn't bear a "hello"
for fear of losing the ground altogether
 Apr 2016 Dev
hadley
sweet inversion
 Apr 2016 Dev
hadley
long days end soft
i quietly fold your smirks and raunchy laughter
into a neat pile
slid under the doorframe
legs crossed in a warm room
is it denial or just a sense of security?
i listen to the cars pass
and for once
i try not to think about whether you also
sit quietly in your blanket of personality
i cannot prevent the lingering hope
that you are my sweet inversion
oppositely compatible
puzzle pieces, torn apart

yet i sit here, perhaps my own inversion
enough to complete all of the equations necessary
with nothing but my own racing mind
and beating heart
so i decide not to think of you
and enjoy a moment of pause
in the soft glow of what isn't immediately apparent
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