I might **** up again.

I want to know if you still remember me;

...

I might ***** up again.

I want to know if you still care;

...

I might cease,

I want to know if I still matter;

...

But in the first place,

I meant nothing, haven't I?

I told you I wanted to die...
You immediately said no...
Didn't ask why... Just a no...
Why so direct, no hesitation?
You surely don't actually like me... Like I like you...
Maybe I've been living in an illusion...
I'm getting anxious...
I'm crumbling, I don't think you've noticed,
I'm distancing myself again, pushing away...
I'm getting bad again, I don't know what is worse...
You ignoring me, or me pushing you away (everyone away)...
I'm a wreck, a lost cause, maybe you should give up on me...
I would if I where you... I'm not worth it... Trust me... Please?

She’s a girl
A girl with hopes and dreams
A girl who has put forth everything
Everything she has
Her hopes and dreams
Are all she wants
Until a man
Dressed in black white approached her
He asks what she wants the most
She told him all her hopes and dreams
Looking her in the eye
He tells her hopes and dreams are for fools
Fools who think their dreams and hope will become reality
With those words she loses
Loses all her hopes and dreams
To what this ugly man said
This ugly man that was only a ghost
A ghost in her own mind

There's a thin line between obsession and love
Often hard to discern
Obsession sits in the bathroom while you ****
Love shoves a magazine under the door

Just blank.
Blank
blank
bLanK
BlaNk
That's how my mind was
Ever since you left.

Fell down
To the ground
Halo’s gone
Skin scarred
Not a human
Now dressed as man
Wings burnt
Heaven sent?
Castaway?
Did he obey
Or betray?
Punishment
Or testament?

i’ve been thinking a lot
about your hand in mine
the way that our fingers
and palms intertwine

but i think about death
about loss, about worth
i admit that i fear
to return to the earth

where our bodies dissolve
into roots of a tree
and will grow into trunk
then limb, then leaf

but i've heard from a bird
that death will reverse
and your heart will beat hard
like it did at your birth

so hold on for dear life
with your hand in mine
if death makes us let go
it is only for time



© Mike Mortensen