I love and hate to see her when she cries:
It breaks my heart like a pane of stained glass.
But having washed the windows of her eyes,
I better see her soul's amazing grace.  
And seeing me through wet-washed window panes,
She better sees my faithful love for her.
So all her tears (that fall like summer rains)
Reveal us heart and soul.  Elle est ma fleur.
Thanks be to God for tender-hearted tears
That speak a deeper truth than truthful words.
Though truthful words are health to hearing ears,
Tears speak the truth that yokes us two lovebirds.
Thanks be to God for truth that's so conveyed.  
She's fearfully and wonderfully made.

My favorite gifts were all from Christ the Lord:
The midnight Scrabble game where U and I
Were side by side and face to face and high
On Christmas Spirit, cherishing the Word;
That great game of Oahu that I won;
That great game of Oahu that I lost;
The time I spent pretending to be Frost
Seeking a rime and landing on a pun;
The yummy apple pie perfectly baked,
Second to  ̶M̶a̶r̶t̶h̶a̶ ̶S̶t̶e̶w̶a̶r̶t̶'̶s̶  none, and made with TLC;
The morning coffee brought to me at 3
P.M. by her who kissed me as I waked.
My favorite gifts have everything to do
With, Bethany Elvira Vitters, you!

It's Friday night, and we're snug in a bed
     With bedding that's very thready.
The weekend is ours, but I think of work
     On Monday, and I miss you already.

From out of the depths
of a sea of tea and soup
comes a gaseous gurgling
glugging of bubbles
gluggulous enough
to sink a ship of ****,
as though Leviathan lived
in my sweetheart's belly,
passing monster gas.

Alvina

There once was a gal named Alvina
Who lived in a shoe in Regina.
     She wanted some tea
     That was straight from the tree,
So she shoveled a tunnel to China.


Pelvis

There once was a singer named Elvis
Who sang all his songs from his pelvis.
     He'd speckendick dance
     Like he had ants in his pants
Till fangirls and fruits wet themselvis.  


Alvina

There once was a gal named Alvina,
A registered nurse for a gyne-
     cological practice
     Who purchased a cactus
That jumped on a naked ******.  


Moana

There once was a gal from Iona
Who gave to a fella a bona.
     They met waist to waist
     In a manner unchaste,
And he made her a moana and groana.


Alvina

There once was a gal named Alvina,
A trucker from North Carolina
     Who'd smoke a whole packa
     Cigarettes and then hacka
Whole lungful of spastic angina.


Kitty

There once was a cat named Aurora
Who played with the fauna and flora
     That made up the playground
     Where daily she'd play 'round
And was part of the casa next doora.  


Alvina

There once was a gal named Alvina,
A sous-chef from South Carolina.
     She cut up some meat
     For a diner to eat
That was raw, and she gave him trichina.  


Limtard

There once was a castor canadensis
who had a lover who was a dude
     who brewed
     camellia sinensis
and who wrote a limerick that was ******* and rude and crude.

Her castor sack
makes ****** juice.
Her ****** back-
side, chocolate mousse.

A warm embrace
with an eager ******
gave me a case
of ****** fever.

At Volta Lake
we've left the stench
of human love
on breeze and bench
(me and my sweet
sour saucy *****)

where faces up
the mountain man
who's natively
American,
and not, in fact,
an Indian.