In a coma induced by your dark heart. Blind to the evils and red lights. I feel alive in my dreams where your touch awakens me when in reality your touch pushes me deeper into the abyss. A microphone wraps me in it’s love. I express myself and feel at home with you and then feel cold and empty after I’ve poured my heart out to you. Hold my heart in your morphine covered hands. You’re the killer wasp of my honeycomb soul, aggressively protect me from outsiders so that I can never see any other light. Imagining a place where love is freedom and being alone is locks and chains yet reality is holding me back from this. Deep in my head, happiness is a passing train. Depression is always there, sadness hidden in plain sight, anger breaks me into pieces and leaves me black and blue. I lie in the dark in agonizing pain throwing bottled SOS messages into a river of blood. Me, myself and I have a lot in common. Only us to understand each other as others try to decipher our thoughts.
END

10 feet below the water’s surface and losing breath. A hundred pink gladiolus flowers float in the water above me. I see the sun’s rays burst through the edges of the petals to me. Grasping the sun’s rays to pull myself to the surface, I use the light as a ladder. I reach the surface and grap the pink gladiolus flowers. They turn into atropa belladonna in my cut up hands, the sun hurts me and Atropos threatens to cut my string. I retreat and go 11 feet under the water’s surface. I stay there and I lose breath, my lungs feel as if they’re going to collapse and just as I was going to close my eyes for good a single pink gladiolus gently sinks through the water past me. I watch it sink, it goes down past me and keeps sinking. I keep my eyes on it until it finally disappears into the darkness. I look up and I see hundreds of pink gladiolus flowers sinking in the water. The beautiful sight gives me hope. I grab flowers and pull myself up to the surface. I fly up out of the water and Atropos looks me in my eyes. I have one chance to change the goddess’s mind. I wrap my arms around her and she gently puts away her scissors. She knows that I’m worthy of a new fate so she sends me to a forest filled with gladiolus flowers and weeping willows. I know that I will someday see her again so I will make the most of the time that she gave me for now until we finally reunite.
END

Read this and absorb my soul. I’m rotted with wisdom as I travel through a grayscale world in which every living thing wears a frown. Morbid and alone, love is nightshade and agony is pleasure. Distopion, tyranny and oppression. This place is corrupted. I need a pen so that I can further depress myself. I scratch out the bad ideas as if the ones you read now are good. Scratch me, scratch my pen. Walk across my thoughts, lose yourself. Run across my thoughts and your soul will pour from your mouth and my demons will feast upon it.
END

I, as a serpent, constrict a saw blade to save myself from the danger it threatens me with. Dying from blood loss as I constrict the blade I am filled with new wisdom on a subject I was completely ignorant, until now when it’s too late for the wisdom to be any use to me. The sky is myne to be free. Like a moth I chase after the light in the dark and crave to be in its presence. When day comes and light is in abundance I lose interest and hide away until it lacks once again. I ignore the stars beaming down on me as I chase artificial light. The tears of the stars fall down and become filtered by the clouds then rain down on me. They throw me down and take me to the wildflowers. The beauty hypnotizes me and I get lost there. There is where I will die of ignorance.
END

Secrets in the taste of my voice, they fill us with wonder. We run on a rainbow bridge that glistens in the darkness. In a trance, I follow the smell of our love. Grasping hands while grasping hearts. I grasp your soul and you grasp my voice. I question your beauty and you remind me that angels have flaws and Satan was the most beautiful angel. Crushing souls and tearing hearts. Scarred and never to think the same with new wisdom. Lost on a grayscale bridge, secrets lie in the sound of my tattered soul.
END

Bless the cross. Bless the sinners that worship. Forgiveness is necessary, excuses are accepted. Innocence in all. I crumble with it’s stare, with the weight of my beliefs. Religion equals no evil but you are still tied down. Tied down to the cross, it’s always there on the back of your head. The devil is accepting, the god is forgiving.

Now… hail Mary, hail Mary, hail Mary, hail Satan… hail Mary.
END

I bandage my flaws but they never heal. Covered, still there. I paint the bandages pink, only temporary. I want to retreat into a shell where I can be safe and unseen. Vanity is a burden. It is a disease, an addiction and it is a distraction. Why must I be this way? Why do I care so much? Is it that I crave acceptance? I want to be loved, to be in love, can that happen for me? I await a dove to land on an alligator’s nose, thinking it’s a mossy log floating in the water, just as the alligator dies from heart failure. I await perfection. The odds, though, weigh completely out of my favor. I feel like perfection is just coincidences lined up just right until they are right where they should be. I’m not important enough for that. My goal here is to stop giving a ****. Help?
END