The hate gets stronger and stronger
Until she can no longer take it
And then she breaks it; that thing called silence.
She breaks everything in her heart until she's no longer smiling.
No longer caring so she doesn't wanna fake that smile anymore
Although she's smiling

    Having no one to understand what she feels or how long her wrists has to bleed before she thinks she's okay...
She's full of it, full of hate..
Recognizing that her real eyes realized the real lies that came from the one she loved.
The one who she was willing to go above for.
Not knowing how to hate but desperately wanting to
Saying she's full of it but no one believes her
She wonders if they'll believe her when she decides to leave them..
Several attempts but never physically successful.. She believes that no one loves her
Because she's full of it, full of hate..

She has no mutual soul to cater to her, because she's full of it, full of  hate..

In her reflection she has grown out of her beautiful self.
She wants help, she needs help, but she keeps it to herself
It's killing her inside
She locks up her soul, remains speechless and heads outside this cruel world, longing for a place to fit in somehow..
She'll forever be that girl that was always different..
She's  the opposite of everything her parents wanted her to be
I guess she's unique
She's also full of it,
full of hate..


~N

you said you were leaving

i was overwhelmed by this happiness

you were finally out of my life

i could finally be free

so you packed your things, you went to your car and loaded it

then,

you turned to me

pulled out a handgun

and shot me in the chest

my skin tore and presented a large gaping hole

and from it poured bright red disappointment

my ribs cracked and out rolled my heart onto the concrete of my patio

you laughed a hearty laugh with wicked undertones

you shoved your gun into your pocket

watched me choke, watched me scream at the top of my lungs, struggle for air, struggle for anything

then towered me, bent down swiftly and picked up the bleeding thing

you smirked at me, "only taking what's mine"

i never saw you again