Insomnia strikes some nights

Tangible darkness standing tall
Proud like a protective friend watching over me as I lie in bed awake

Let me take trip to someplace sunny or warm
Any adjective that doesn't describe my room

Paint you on ceiling in vivid colors

Scribble your name over the walls in blood

In naked essence you are this-pervasive

Bend so you resemble something easier on my battered heart to feel

Knows you
Doesn't know who you are

Other nights I am not an insomniac
The darkness tucks in my sleeping form like a parent lovingly telling their child a bedtime story

My muse visits dreams and won't let me forget for even one second

Bewildered like arrows flying backwards from the target

And white birds sing melody similar to ours and it intensifies my agony

Surreal as falling snow in sizzling July

Tongues no longer twisted like tree roots

Moist darkness kisses goodnight like you once did
Not nearly as sweet

I yearn for it to be you instead

I will get nowhere faster than you
Just look at the yellow lights I'm blowing through
Yes, for a moment it seems you have the edge
But you drive with your heart instead of your head
I saw that no u-turn coming for miles
You cut me off, and I was all smiles
In reality we both have nowhere to get to
But I'm gonna get there faster than you

I saw truth plain as day
Knew I did not mean much
Didn't possess the sense to leave
Desperate to experience your touch
Now you are running away from me
Too cowardly to say goodbye
I am left looking like a **** fool
Just another passerby
Your silence says it all
Want nothing more to do with me
After effort I put forth
Cast me aside like worthless debris
Now true colors are revealed
I caught a glimpse of them before
Gave another chance because
Believed you were capable of more
I worked hard to be somebody you wanted
To improve my imperfections
Did little things to make you smile
Hoping to avoid rejection
Only for actions to be in vain
I am still all alone
Changes made were a stupid waste
If only I would have known
You were just biding time
Til better opportunity came along
May not have been Mr. Right
The way you treated me wrong
I was fine keeping us the way we were
Simply wanted to clarify where we stood
I asked if this was a relationship
Maybe I misunderstood
And even when you lied to me
Disloyalty breaking trust
Still forgave all your mistakes
Until emotions were stomped into dust
I was ready to settle for bare minimum
As long as I could hold you close
Warm sensation was enough
Even if I wasn't what you desired the most
But despite being tolerant and understanding
Still decided to shut me out
After sharply slapped in the face
Finally realize I'm better without
Should never have waited around for you
Because I enjoyed your caress
Deserve so much better than that
I've learned I'd rather be lonely than settle for less