She was so lucky.
Friends.
Several of them.
All of them kind and real and amazing.
School.
So kind and real and amazing.
Nobody scans her as she walks the halls.
Nobody judges her every choice.

Nobody notices when she chooses to eat information instead of food.
Nobody realizes she notices the little glances just barely within her sight
     Or the muffled snickers
     Or the sly comments.

Nobody knows how absolutely aware she is.
Nobody hears her trembling breaths in the bathroom
silenced by the palm of her hand.
Nobody could ever know how hard it is to ignore all of it;
                                              how hard it is to not hate yourself;
                                              how hard it is to hide everything
carefully packaged under the confines of her undershirt.

Nobody can tell that inside those bulging rolls is simply a girl with social anxiety and insecurities beyond mental health.
Nobody sees her bury her feelings in her sparse salads and amaranthine assignments.
Nobody sees her.

you can make even the greyest wall
gain colour

i am an iceberg

there is more to me than meets the eye

but even when surrounded
by those made of the same values

i can feel myself
slowly melting

away

until i am exactly
as i seem

- p. winter

my keyboard is broken
like me
so some leer will be missing
hoefllly yo can ndersand
i'm broken
and like my keyboard
i'm missing things which
i can be cant be wihot
if yo can ndersand this
then maybe yor broken o
becase yo ndersand my brokeness which
is more then i ca say abot alot of eole

The air is getting thick
I can't breathe anymore
The dark clouds follow me
When will this nightmare end
This vicious cycle of pain
Please stop the pain
The stress is eating me alive
I'm fragile and weak
No job is worth this fear
I need money not pain
I'm not me anymore
Confused on what to do
I have everything to lose
All I want is to breathe again