My heart hates you so much my beloved.
Yet the whole of my soul still needs you terribly.
We are so ******* far apart, ******* it.
Your love is taking such a toll on me.

I’d kiss you to death if I only had the chance to do so,
I’d made love to you until you wouldn’t want to anymore
I’d hug you until you couldn’t breathe even if you chose to do so
I’d make you miss me so much that you couldn’t stand it.

I chase our memories until exhaustion every day,
Needless to say it seems impossible to take you out of my mind.
Your touch has been lodged so deep inside of me.
It seems so uncanny that I can’t separate you from myself.

Whenever I try to move on and build my life again.
You just seem to magically appear in front of me all of a sudden,
Destroying at once any sort of hope of me finding love again.
Leaving me alone to wonder in the corridors of my own mind.

I’d die for you a hundred deaths and I’d fight and win for you a thousand battles.
I’d make a deal with the devil only to deceive him at the end
I would sell my soul to him to just get a moment of eternity with you even in hell (it would seem like heaven)
Even though you wouldn’t go out with me for coffee, tea or for a meal.

I know that I’m only gaining your pity from all of this indeed.
Maybe I’m not worthy of your love or even your attention.
What pains me so much is that you won’t even hate me for God’s sake.
So that much I’m indifferent to you after all that we’ve been through? After all of this??

It is my destiny to go through a love like this.
Doomed and ****** forever to never to be with the one I truly want
I just hope one day that you change your mind before it’s too late
So you can come and save me from death with a kiss of yours

I just ******* miss you I freaking miss us so much…****!..
I have no other choice other than to wait for you my beloved
Even if it takes me an eternity I will wait for you my red colored, egg shaped, thorn covered rose.
I‘ll wait for you, until the ashes of what used to be my brain and heart once, disappear, forever lost into oblivion.

For simply
I have no
Other
Choice.

It's a heart, the room
Walls so close
Feeling the veins, the spasm
It had me in, lost all
Let it win, to win it all,
When it drops the life begins
So play it to have it all,
Make it beat to have it all

have you ever felt completely lost in your own story.

almost as if you are standing in the middle of a dark patch of woods,
not know which way to go or how you even got there.

like you know what you are supposed to do but you have no idea how to do it.

feel out of place when you are the one who placed yourself there, and just thought, who have i become.

who's shoes have i walked in to get here. lost here.

seeing through your eyes yet it's like you've been blindfolded and someone else has been guiding you along this whole time.

you hear people the same as always but you start to question who they are and most importantly who they are to you because behind the familiar face is someone who you feel expects you to decide and make decisions on choices you've never seen or even felt before.

lost in these woods you just stare at different trees and look up to the not even full glowing moon and just stare. not knowing what happened, what is happening or what is going to happen.

lost

Monday comes, you're feeling ace
until you ****** realise
that Mickey Mouse and Donald Duck
just truly give a f@@k

realising makes you speechless
who could have imagined such a rudeness
but well, it opens up your eyes
when you finally then realise

cyberspace is not the place to stay
coz there's always one who finds a way
to make you cry
when you just wonder why

I wish you were right here,
Right now,
With me,
Together we pass this fcking tiring day,
Cause everywhere i go,
I saw your shadows,
Everytime i turn around,
I caught your glimpse,
Every sound i heard,
It resembled yours,
I always imagine how you would solve all of these,
I wonder how you would speak,
How you would act,
How you would smile this pain away,
But i know, i really know,
I can't ask for more,
Cause I'm nobody.
And still,
I'll be waiting for you with a strong heart,
Til' we meet again
:)