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Sep 2014 · 319
tears of joy
Emily Sep 2014
crying tears of joy
because i have never been so in love before
i have the most beautiful girl in my life
and we help each other through all of the bad times

crying tears of joy
because i have never seen a face so beautiful
or a body so exquisite
she is beyond the precious and the delicate

crying tears of joy
because i have never encountered such a blessing
she provides me with the perfect love
she is my all and there's no one else above

crying tears of joy
when i think of the way we make love
it's a celestial experience
worshipping each other, removing any distance

crying tears of joy
now that i know i've found my life's true purpose
adoring her and caring for her are what i do best
being with her is my reason, marrying her is next

crying tears of joy
when i look into her blue eyes
she asks me why tears are rolling down my face
i respond saying i can't believe it's her i get to date
my baby is so **** perfect. i'm so fortunate to be surrounded by the most beautiful ******* earth. she makes my world spin, she makes everything worth while. when we are together, i am so happy.
Sep 2014 · 276
depression
Emily Sep 2014
depression isn't an excuse to be mean
but one must understand what comes along with a depressed mind
it isn't fun and games
it isn't smiles and laughs
and more times than not it is impossible to forge happiness
you can't expect everything out of someone who can't even get out of bed
you can't expect sanity when one is high off of self inflicted pain
and wasted off of several bottles of alcohol
maybe it is something others can't quite comprehend or understand
maybe it is something not everybody has had the misfortune to experience
but please don't hold it against those who have
please don't assume that they are bad people
because they are good at their core
and they are trying their very hardest to find the light
Sep 2014 · 398
Distance
Emily Sep 2014
This distance poisons my heart
It rots my mind
Sometimes I don't think
Our love can withstand the test of time

This distance poisons my heart
It fills my head with doubts
Leads me to believe this will never happen
I forget what our love is all about

This distance poisons my heart
Triggers me to do unthinkable things
Makes me feel like I'm not worth it
Makes me inflict these bleeding stings

This distance poisons my heart
I'm always wondering why
Why you are there and I am here
And all I ever manage to do is cry
I miss my girlfriend so ******* much
Sep 2014 · 303
broken promises
Emily Sep 2014
i promised my girlfriend
that i'd stay clean
but i can't seem to stay
away from the blade
Aug 2014 · 233
never the same
Emily Aug 2014
A few days in now
Never will my skin look the same
I'll always be reminded of this pain
I thought I could be strong
But every day I grow weaker
Give in to the urge and grab the blade
Run it across, not feeling any shame
Crying, smiling, laughing, glaring
It's more than just ****** up
I've truly lost myself
I've no idea what I'm doing
The only thing I'm sure of
Is how worthless I feel
And how ugly I look
My wish to disappear
Conflicts with my wish to stay
I tell myself through the flow of years
"I don't want to die,
I just want to be happy for once"
I wonder if this will ever stop
Or if I'm slowly destroying myself
One cut after the other
Aug 2014 · 262
New Addiction
Emily Aug 2014
I've cut myself four times the past two days
For the first time ever
And I never understood why or how cutters became cutters
I thought it would never be me
But now I understand
When you're in such pain
When you're experiencing depression
You reach such a low point
And the first time you try it
It hurts, it stings
But then you see the blood
And it's like a wave of clarity comes over you
You see the blood and it makes you smile
The first smile you've had on your face in a while
There is something about seeing the blood
And seeing the scar
That makes your pain real
That makes you feel validated
And you cry as you swipe the blade across
But then the cut is made
And suddenly, your eyes dry up
You're able to breathe again
It's addicting
Aug 2014 · 315
Giving Up
Emily Aug 2014
You can't fix people
All the love in the world
Wouldn't be enough
You give so much of yourself
Only to eventually just give up
Aug 2014 · 237
What Do You Do
Emily Aug 2014
What do you do
During those hours without me
Do you think of someone else
Someone new to make you happy

What do you do
During that time spent alone
In the middle of the night
You don't even call me on the phone

What do you do
During the hours that you're away
Are you dreaming of something else
Something new to rid your pain

What do you do
During that time to yourself
Do you even think of me
Or am I just gathering dust on a shelf

You're getting tired of me
Annoyed with me throughout your day
The hours we have together are shortened
You're in control
You leave me
You're leaving me
You're gone
I'm dead
Aug 2014 · 381
Trick
Emily Aug 2014
There's no such thing as sleep
On lonely nights like these
Why do I keep trying
When no one is listening
Why do I keep breathing
When I don't seem to matter
Sick of the games people play
And the lies people tell
Betrayal in the past
Has left me wary and confused
Tired of all these thoughts
That race through my head
I sit around in torment
Never leaving my bed
Being in love comes at such a cost
You never knew that you could feel this lost
Unsure what my next move should be
All I know is that the unknown is weighing on me
I just take the bottle
Pour shot after shot
My brain is invaded with toxic poison
I'm able to sit and forget these emotions
Just a bit more should do the trick
Aug 2014 · 637
My Only Wish
Emily Aug 2014
These nights are so lonely without you
It's almost like you don't exist
Time with you is all I ask for
Your love is my only wish
Aug 2014 · 532
let me tell you
Emily Aug 2014
I want to make love to you
I want you to know all the things you make me feel
There are certain emotions
And specific feelings
That are hard to get down in words
There aren't any words or explanations
For what I feel for you
My love for you goes beyond the emotional
Goes beyond the physical
I am in dyer need of your love
Of your pleasure
You are my one desire
The true love of of my life
You ******* alive
You provide me with my every breath
I want to make love to you
I want to buy you gifts
I want to do nice things for you without expectation
And show you in every way
That you are my world
My sun sets and rises with you
Please let me show you
Let me tell you
All that you mean to me
I wish you believed me
Aug 2014 · 379
Untitled
Emily Aug 2014
i never wish to break your heart
i never wish to have your fragile heart
and lose it by playing a foolish game
my love for you is not a game
my feelings for you will never change
they will only grow stronger and stronger
each and every day
they will follow you
they will not go astray
i never wish to take your love for granted
i would never have you for myself
and claim another at the same time
i would never dream of sabotaging our love
i could never imagine destroying the beautiful relationship that we have created
there is nothing in this world i wouldn't do
in order to fight for our love
to fight for you
you are my true inspiration
you are my true reason
without you, i am nothing
i have nothing
i will never forsake you
i will never betray you
my love for you is not a game
it is real
the realest love i've ever felt
and i will do everything humanly possible to maintain our love
to keep us afloat
to make you happy
you are my lasting love
my beautiful angel sent from above
i will never leave you
i will never destroy you
i will never want anybody but you
Aug 2014 · 450
proposal
Emily Aug 2014
i wish just for a minute
that you could borrow my eyes
and see the way i see you
and how i'm mesmerized
you'd find that no one compares
when i stand them next to you
and there's no price on our love
that would ever, ever make do
you'd see that you take my breath away
that your beauty makes me stunned
and when i think about how you're mine
i know that's when i've truly won

if you could look inside my heart
you would find a shimmering glow
it exists because you created it
and since then it's started to grow
right when i saw you for the first time
something magical took place within me
i was struck with love
and hit with pure adoration
my life changed forever
you became my safe haven

if you could peak inside my soul
you will see that its sole purpose is you
your happiness and your forever
are the things it desires most
it will never be complete
without you by its side
you are its only soul mate
and it longs for you to be a bride

please say that you'll marry me
and be with me till the end of our days
even when our bodies aren't thriving
our love will live within our souls
never forgetting, always remembering
the beautiful love we will constantly share
i am so in love.
Aug 2014 · 2.2k
scared
Emily Aug 2014
have you ever been so in love
that every step you take
you take in the name of

your lover
your soulmate
your best friend


your heart hurts to have distance
your mind wanders into bad places
after not speaking much that day

does she make your world spin
does he make your heart pound
do you feel like at any moment
your world could end
if suddenly
her love stopped
he no longer needed you

a smile can turn to a frown
a laugh can turn into a cry
you think you know all the answers
but all of a sudden, you're asking why

what if the worst happens
what if you end up alone
what if she doesn't want you
or he stops calling you on the phone

day after day
the fear grows within me
i'm losing my vision with every hour
all my senses are away from me
i'm scared to death of what could be

i want your heart forever
i want to see your mind
i want to feel secure with our love
i want to know you're mine
Aug 2014 · 1.0k
cold and wicked
Emily Aug 2014
you never cared about me
you never wanted to be mine
you just dug a deep hole
stuck me there with all of your lies
made me feel miserable
unwanted, ugly, and used
can't believe i fell for it
it happens every time
this big heart i have
is nothing but a curse
love ruins my life
and makes me feel like i'm the worst
i can't think straight
funny how i can't even function
shaking uncontrollably
sweating profusely
not one good thought
flows through my head
only thinking that i wish i were dead
you make me feel like death
is the answer to my problems
it may sound dramatic
but i can't even breathe
what is this life
without the one you love
you said you needed me
you said you had love for me
but you treat me like i'm a pest
make me feel like i'm a bother
i'll just leave you be
it's clear i'm not wanted
it's clear you don't give a ****
i wish i could be like you instead
someone cold and wicked
******* with a broken heart
i can't seem to write anymore
i wrote this in one short sitting
i know it's not good
but i have to let it out somewhere

© Emily 2014
Aug 2014 · 570
exhausted
Emily Aug 2014
loving you more
has turned into
the biggest chore
© Emily 2014
Aug 2014 · 301
Risk
Emily Aug 2014
Sometimes I feel like it's all too good to be true
Is our love real
Do you love me like I love you

Sometimes I think that we're in love with the thought
The thought that we could be something great
It's hard to tell when you're so far away

Risking it all to be with you is scaring me
The closer the time comes
The more I'm pushed into a world of skepticism

The worries flood my mind
And it's frightening to think I could be doing this all for nothing
Only to be left alone in the end

One of us has to take the plunge
To see if this is real
How will we ever know without any risk

Hoping and praying that our relationship works
That we will have a fighting chance
And live the life we've always wanted

I love you
I want you
Love me
And want me too
This is rambles that I tried to turn into poetry and basically failed. Oh well.

© Emily 2014
Jul 2014 · 389
FriENDship
Emily Jul 2014
Throwing our friendship to the ground
Hanging out with your new friends
Forgetting that I've always been around
Their loyalty won't match mine
Their care won't live as deep as mine always has
I can't believe that after all this time
You choose to throw what we had aside
Replace our friendship for something not nearly as special
Forgetting who's been with you since the beginning
Who has grown with you
Lived with you
Loved you
It hurts me to the core
Because I know I love you more
I'm slowly becoming part of your past
I thought our friendship would always last
© Emily 2014
Emily Jul 2014
England calls my name
That's where my love waits for me
Across the blue sea
Haiku.

Title inspired by the Simon and
Garfunkel song, Kathy's song.

© Emily 2014
Jul 2014 · 5.7k
Pineapple
Emily Jul 2014
The sweet pineapple
I can taste upon her tongue
Not as sweet as what's below
15 words.

© Emily 2014
Jul 2014 · 719
Not That Girl
Emily Jul 2014
Scorching heat casted upon me
Squinted eyes and drops of sweat
The cold pool, a pleasant shock
Oozing confidence in my bikini
Tan skin, mermaid hair
Behold, this is not my life
I'm not that girl
I hate the summertime
© Emily 2014
Jul 2014 · 302
Fearful
Emily Jul 2014
I'm in love with you
Though I feel I hardly know you
The distance makes me feel
Unaccustomed to who you are
We live separate lives
How could our love last
All the way to the end of time
It is unrealistic
And for more than just that reason
What I want from you
I feel you cannot provide
Not because you aren't capable
But simply because you aren't mine
You belong to the world
You belong to yourself
You shouldn't have to answer
To anyone else
You're far too innocent
To carry on with this
Maybe I should let you go
But the direction I should take
I really don't know
I'm waiting for a sign
Something crystal clear
Until I see it
I'll always be living in fear
Afraid that our relationship will fail
And I end up alone
© Emily 2014
Jul 2014 · 294
Tracks Of My Tears
Emily Jul 2014
Tears roll down my face
Leaving tracks across my cheeks
It seems like the end is inevitable
Our relationship will only fail
You're so far away from me
And we're at different places in our lives
Our love is so strong
Yet so weak at the same time
I'm so conflicted
I've never wanted anything more in my entire life
I've never loved someone so much
But I can't seem to believe that what we have will survive
Through all the obstacles that we face in our relationship
The distance, the trust, our past
It all piles on top of each other
Making it hard to see clearly
Sometimes I don't even know if you want me
You're the girl of my dreams
You're the only one I see
And I cannot get over this fear that lives within me
The fear that we will end and I will lose you
And I won't know how to move on
Or how to continue living this life
You are my everything
You are all I know
What will I do
If I ever lose you
Title inspired by the song by Smokey Robinson

© Emily 2014
Jul 2014 · 592
Anomie
Emily Jul 2014
Betrayal and heartache are the resultant of the most sorrowful of circumstances
It comes from losing yourself in the one you love the most
And losing them as a result of being a complete fool
This duo has a way of eating at the soul
It sneaks up in the most beautiful of disguises
It uses you for your love and your generosity
Planting itself in the thing that attracts you most
It makes you need it to survive
Takes all advantage of you and ***** you dry
Leaving you for dead without a way to sleep, breathe, or function
You've become a soulless body
And a heartless being
A dark feeling of anomie
Depressed and meaningless
© Emily 2014
Jul 2014 · 1.3k
Lifeless
Emily Jul 2014
No more love poems to be written
In this heart of mine
Only feelings of loss and resignation
Take over my soul and cause me agony
It seems like I've been down this road one too many times before
And I sit here wondering why I did the same things
Thinking of all the signs I chose to ignore
I wonder if I'll learn my lesson
I wonder if I'll ever heal
Heartbreak takes a toll on people
And I've been suffering for so long
Thoughts and wonder fill my brain
About if I'll ever love again
If I'll ever find trust in another
© Emily 2014
Jul 2014 · 332
Pink Matter
Emily Jul 2014
Straddle me in your pink robe
Lean down to kiss me
As I pull the strings
The sides fall away
Exposing you to me
My hands wrap around your warm skin
And feel your perfect body
As my lips feel your kisses
Soft at first
Passionately growing
You're my muse
You're so fantastic
This life is nothing without you
© Emily 2014
Jul 2014 · 366
Winner
Emily Jul 2014
Having her love makes me feel like I've won the lottery
It's as if no one on this planet even exists
There's only her
She's so magnificent
I fall more in love with her every single day
Our phone calls make me smile
I see her face and I look into her eyes
It brings me to tears knowing she's so far away
But we'll get to be together eventually
Just her and me
Where every morning
I'll get to roll over to her
And greet her with a kiss
© Emily 2014
Jul 2014 · 326
ready to give up
Emily Jul 2014
I'm numb
Been feeling this way for a while
Treated all my friends like garbage
And now I have none
I realize now I was treating everyone
The way I was allowing myself to be treated by someone else
I realize now that my mistake was ever doubting myself
And turning my back on the honest friends I did have
My mistake was believing in someone who kept hurting me
Over and over again
My mistake was the fact that I repeated myself
But expected different results
How stupid am I to have wasted all this time
When the answers to my questions were always in my heart and mind
I'll never doubt myself again
I'll never turn my back on those who try to protect me
I only hope I'll be forgiven
And I pray for the guidance I'll need
To never make this mistake again
© Emily 2014
Jul 2014 · 1.7k
Girlfriend
Emily Jul 2014
The way I love her is unlike anything I've ever felt
My heart is literally melting
When she calls me
I hear her voice
And I'm at peace
My eyes meet hers
When I see her face through the screen
And it brings tears to my eyes
I miss her so much even though I'm looking at her
Nothing can stray me away from her
No one can ever compare to her
She's the most amazing, worthy, lovely person I'll ever know
I want her to be my wife
She belongs in my life
I'm so in love it hurts
A pain so sweet
© Emily 2014
Jul 2014 · 349
Side Note
Emily Jul 2014
Sorry my poetry ***** but...I'm posting anyway because I enjoy writing it and what's the point if it's going to remain on these pieces of paper and not be read by anyone else.

Thanks for all the feedback, love, constructive criticism, and support.
© Emily 2014
Jul 2014 · 263
Forever
Emily Jul 2014
Looking like my princess
In that long lavender dress
Walking so elegantly
With those heels, you're taller than me
But you've always towered over me
With your style and your beauty
Love struck to the max
Nothing keeps me away from you
Not a word anyone says makes a difference
Because all I want to do
Is see you move
Dance for me and smile
They'll never understand
How special you are to me
My arms around your waist
My head buried into your neck
Kissing you softly
Teasing just slightly
The night ends
And I take you to bed
Love you all night
Holding you till the end
Morning comes
And you're my princess again
Wrapped up in soft sheets
Hoping these moments of pure bliss
Last forever
© Emily 2014
Jul 2014 · 535
Lake Montana
Emily Jul 2014
She floats on the lake
Bikini top untied
Sipping a beer in one hand
Smoking a cigarette in the other
Talking to me
Sun in her eyes
Squinting into the sky
Her thick accent
An unglamorous moment
But ****, she's never looked better
She makes everything look good
Perfect body and tan skin
I want her right there in the water
But I'm stuck there just watching her
Fantasy land at its best
She makes me feel like such a mess
Always keeps it interesting
There's never a dull moment
Her jokes, her dry humor
Are all the things I love about her
My heart races as she floats to me
She gives me a kiss
I'm stuck in that moment forever
The water is crystal clear
A beautiful sight to see
But fixated on her are my eyes
I'm completely mesmerized
My love
© Emily 2014
Jul 2014 · 297
Beautiful Liar
Emily Jul 2014
Do you like lying
It seems to be all you do
Can't ever speak truths
15 words.

© Emily 2014
Jul 2014 · 978
Too Good To Be True
Emily Jul 2014
I feel like a part of me has died
Now that our love has ended
But then again
It was never love at all
© Emily 2014
Jul 2014 · 357
Morbid Dreaming
Emily Jul 2014
My dearest best friend died young
He was the brightest
The shiniest star
He was the most creative and artistic
The one who would've gone far
Twenty years young
Gone much too soon
Even after these past couple years
My dreams are still haunted
We crack jokes
And do the usual things we did for fun
Then all of a sudden, he's gone
I find him dead in the park
I scream, I cry
Banging my fists against the car window
Yelling out why
Why must my dreams remind me so dramatically
I know he is gone
Why must I live through the pain and shock
All over again
I open my eyes to a harsh reality
This earth has been left without him
It feels like a desolate place void of his warmth and insight
He died and it forever changed me
My beautiful friend
Although he'll always live within
I will still always miss him
© Emily 2014
Jul 2014 · 435
Heartbreak
Emily Jul 2014
I'll never know the softness of your skin
I'll never know the warmth of your smile
I'll never know the taste of your lips
I'll never know you
© Emily 2014
Jul 2014 · 733
Bullshit
Emily Jul 2014
Cutting myself off
From the responsibility
From those that waste my time
Focusing on myself
My success
My happiness
No longer will I live a lie
Just going to say goodbye
To the endless *******
That I seem to have immersed myself in
© Emily 2014
Jul 2014 · 332
First Kiss
Emily Jul 2014
So in love with you it hurts
I miss you when you say goodnight
The hours between us take such a toll
But every single day I love you more
You're like oxygen for my lungs
Sunlight for my skin
This life is a game and with you I win
I know these deep feelings live within my heart
I feel it in my stomach whenever we're apart
I need to see your face
And look into your eyes
Taste your soft lips
And let you know you're mine
Belong to me like I belong to you
Mind, body, and soul
Everything I do is for you
Let me be your happiness
Just like you are mine
Everything you say makes my smile grow
You're my beautiful queen
And I hope you know
I'll do anything for you
And one day I'll cross the ocean to get to you
You're my fate, my destiny
You are supposed to be with me
I can't wait for our first kiss
I've never had it but it's something I miss
© Emily 2014
Jul 2014 · 324
In Due Time
Emily Jul 2014
My love was lost on you
And all the **** you put me through
People come and go
Memories fade away
But you were never here in the first place
I was cheap entertainment
I was nothing special
It didn't take much to get me to fall in love
How foolish of me to think it would've been enough
For someone like you
Someone ****** in the head
And distorted in the heart
Someone who's lied their whole life
And ripped people apart
You say others sacrifice your happiness
All for the sake of their own
But it's the other way around
Since you say anything to benefit yourself
I'll tell you what
I sacrificed everything for you
My happiness, my sanity
And all you did was abuse it
I'm letting you go
You're not the person I thought you were
I gave you a chance when nobody else did
But the way you used me is borderline morbid
It will take a while
But in due time
You will no longer cross my mind
© Emily 2014
Jul 2014 · 497
Stupid
Emily Jul 2014
I must be stupid
I keep on believing in liars
I never learn my lesson
I think anything could be a blessing
But that's not how the world works
People are not true
They're never looking out for you
Only themselves and what they want to do
It isn't fair that you give chance after chance
Only to be left without any romance
Now I want to die
But don't take pity on me
It's all my own fault
I deserve to learn my lesson the hard way
I just didn't think it'd be this hard
"People are not true."
Kurt Cobain

© Emily 2014
Jun 2014 · 601
honey
Emily Jun 2014
dear you,

all i want to convey
is how much you make my every day
i know we fight, but baby, you're mine
we love each other so much
i hate the distance between us
i dream of your beautiful face
you're so full of grace
the way we met wasn't the most common of circumstances
some would say it was bizarre
but we were definitely brought together for a reason
and now you own my heart
nothing compares to your precious love
nothing is as sweet as your kisses that i dream of
i never knew that i would end up here
loving someone so worthy and pure
you make me feel so happy and secure
i feel so lucky looking into your eyes
you're radiant, you're glowing
you're my darling, my honey
thank you for loving me

always yours
© Emily 2014
Jun 2014 · 497
no respect
Emily Jun 2014
i know what it's like to have to get over someone
it's awful
and the only way to truly do it is to cut off communication
i respect when people need to make that decision
the mature and proper way to do it is to meet with the person you've engaged in a relationship with
tell them to their face that you need to be alone in order to do what's best for you
you don't tell them to go **** themselves
especially when you've known them for many years
you've lost all my respect
Emily Jun 2014
it took me saying i wanted your **** for you to look at me romantically instead of as a friend
you then forced yourself on me the next day
you acted like a pig, and not a man worthy of love
you stink because you're such a child you don't even wash your clothes
or take five seconds to put on deodorant
you're going no where in life
stuck in high school days, working the same mundane job
no aspirations, no dreams
and if you do have any, you're too much of a coward to actually go pursue it
you're scared of life, locked away in your filthy apartment
and a job that sits across the street
i want a man who can take care of me
not the other way around
i'm not your ******* mother
and i'm not your lover
not to mention the fact that you're so immature
when you have a problem, you go crying to your mother
instead of having an adult conversation like normal people do
remember all those years i tried so hard for you, and you shot me down
and now that i have moved on, you don't like it
too bad, i gave you so many chances
i gave you so many openings
you told me that we would never be
it was your fault that i ultimately got over you
leave me alone
after all, it was you that said you wanted to get rid of me
don't come crawling back when you regret your decision
Jun 2014 · 291
look in the mirror
Emily Jun 2014
it won't be me that ends up alone forever
it'll be you
i'm emotional
but i'm reasonable
everybody suffers from a tiny bit of neurosis
but i'm not neurotic
i work hard for those that i love
i work diligently to maintain the relationships i have
that's why i actually have friends that love me
and you have none
you are the bad guy of your family
you're the crazy person amongst your tiny group of friends
don't get it mixed up
you are actually mentally ill
look in the mirror, ******
Jun 2014 · 258
goodbye
Emily Jun 2014
i won't forget the way you left me
and i won't forget the way you threw our friendship to the ground
nearly 7 years strong
it was all for nothing
i guess i wasted my time believing you and wanting you for all those years
i guess i wasted my time sticking up for you and defending you
when even your own brother warned me of your childlike personality
not to mention your mother and father
grow up
no relationship is perfect
every friendship has its ups and down
it's only the strong and the willing who stick with it no matter how much it hurts
and no matter how much it frustrates the mind
you are weak
you are stupid
you are inexperienced
clearly you know nothing about what a true relationship entails
it takes hard work, devotion, dedication
it takes two people working through the horrible times
to make it out on the other side
you have lost me forever, since you threw me away
it seems so easy for you to just toss me aside
i hope you realize what you have done
i will never forgive you
you aren't willing to fight for me or us
the way i was willing to fight and wait for the right time
the time when we could have been happy
but you ruined it
© Emily 2014
Jun 2014 · 227
Kisses
Emily Jun 2014
Laying on the couch
Thinking of your lips against mine
And how I'll smile as we kiss
Tell you I love you
And escape to a place I've never been
You're my heaven
© Emily 2014
Jun 2014 · 804
you
Emily Jun 2014
you
you make the handle look appealing
you make the bottle of pills look like the answer
what a perfect combination for death that they make together
you make me want to leave the earth
you make tears fall from my eyes at a rate they never have before
maybe on the other side things will be better
maybe on the other side you won't have all the power
call me an idiot, call me some more names
it only makes the urge grow much larger
i gulp it all down, one shot together
glass after glass
pill after pill
this is what is left of my free will
i can't live without you
so i might as well die
look what you've done to me
so young yet already saying goodbye
this is so unlike me, so unreal
but without you, life's anything but ideal
i have lost all my strength
and lost all my wits
my sense and my brain were gone forever
when you stole my heart
falling in love is such a trap
it causes more games and heartaches
and i just can't keep track
maybe this is the end
maybe this isn't
i guess it just depends on how toxic this poison is
but it's not the drugs that killed me
it was you
© Emily 2014
Jun 2014 · 312
storm within
Emily Jun 2014
you carved his name
into your skin
almost like
an uncontrollable sin

but it was reminiscent
of his name across your heart
and how without him
you always fall apart

foolish to believe
your every word
i let it pass
ignoring what they inferred

you still love him
want him with all your might
and when you are lonely
you think of him at night

i'm no where to be found
in that mind of yours
i'm not even in your heart
even after fighting all these wars

i guess i never won
the battle was always too hard
so i surrender now
my feelings you can disregard

it's nothing you haven't done
it should be easy for you
since all you ever did
was rip my soul in two

use me, abuse me
take advantage of my will
to love and protect you
i think i must be ill

countless sleepless nights
turn into bed ridden days
and during that time
i dream of pure rage

the rage that was once
a true love formed
now in the wake of a hurricane
in my heart brews a storm

my tears are the rain
my emotions blow like the wind
my silent cries howl
as i realize you weren't even a friend

maybe time will help
this pain to subside
then the healing can commence
once my love for you has died
© Emily 2014
Jun 2014 · 318
Best Fri(end)
Emily Jun 2014
You lose your best friend
It feels like the world will end
What is the point now
Haiku

© Emily 2014
Jun 2014 · 250
Forever And A Day
Emily Jun 2014
I'm sorry I wasted so much time in our relationship being a *****
I hope she realizes the type of man she's got
I hope she sees what an incredibly intelligent guy you are
I hope she treats you with respect
I hope she understands the way you work
I hope she is able to read you the way I could
I hope she makes you happy
I hope she cooks your favorite foods
I hope she likes the music you do and can make you laugh
I hope she doesn't care that you enjoy the occasional ****
I hope she enjoys that with you the way I did and do
I hope she loves you as deeply and as passionately as you deserve to be loved
I hope she knows that to have you is a privilege, a high honor
I hope she's the one and makes you happy
I'm feeling terrible and sorry that it couldn't be me
I'll miss you probably forever and a day
Wishing it could've always stayed that way
Wondering now where things went wrong
Listening to Rebelution reminds me of my ex...

© Emily 2014
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