Weepy is my heart as it mourns hard this day
Muddled is my head with thoughts all amuck
Muffled is my voice with the words I try to say
Stifled are my screams as they try but all seem stuck.

Tense are my shoulders with the load that I bear
Wet are my eyes seeing everything so blurry
Heavy is my chest as it sighs and draws its air
Tired is this body with so much it attempts to carry.

Weak is my strength, fending off oh so feebly
Uncertain are my hopes to see the light at the end
Outstretched are my arms reaching and grabbing constantly
Tested is my resolve, how much further can it bend.

Lonely is my soul yearning greatly for it's other pair
Drunken are my senses, almost losing all control
Desperate is my being wanting love that's not here but there
Clouded is my future, totally obscured is my goal.

Two-sided are the fallen words I have listed before
Strained is my mind as I try to view the good
Mirrored are these feelings, they bear so much more
Enlightened is my will, I shan't mope and brood.

Relieved is my heart when I think of the other that beats
Serene is my head when I separate fear from fear
Loud is my voice as it clears for the love it greets
Redundant are my screams for I don't need them here.

Relaxed are my shoulders, still fueled to continue
Wide are my eyes for the sight they can't always see
Lifted is my chest for the love it wants to pursue
Upright is this body, to get to where it wants to be.

Rejuvenated is my strength when I accept that I am strong
Restored are my hopes, I'd still keep them alive
Faithful are my arms, still reaching for what they long
Strengthened is my resolve with plans it'll contrive.

Contented is my soul for the mate it has found
Heightened are my senses, embraced by feelings so keen
Centred is my being, keep my bearings on the ground
Bright is my future, in my dreams they have been.

Empty are the words for I won't let them linger
Focused is my mind; on my prize no matter how far
Embraced are these feelings for they only make me stronger
Steeled is my will; to be one with my love, angel and star...

after sharing her son’s birth story, the woman comments on the oddness of hearing it aloud.  she closes by saying all words are her last.  she is at least as old as the brother I’m told I have.  when told, I believe the one speaking is speaking to the room I’m in that’s been entered by the likes of me as into a place where a manuscript has just been finished.  I continue my brother as a distraction in the form of a man trying to erase a cigarette burn from the arm of a typist.  man makes the sound I have on my person that both my parents made.  instead of taking her medication, the woman imagines herself homeless in a part of town she’s passed while having ***.

This is your invitation.
To come in through the door that's open.
You're an invited guest.

You determine the mood.
We both determine the rules.
Even the decision to follow and abide.
Or live without them within time.
This is your invitation.

This is no blurred line.
I've directly told you the things upon my mind.
You must be interested because you're before my eyes.
This is your invitation.

Come in and enjoy the fun.
Let's create one great time.

Their hatred sharper
Than the blade of my knife
Yet still they chose to ignore
The fact that they’re destroying me,
Situating me into oblivion.

Yet they expect forgiveness,
Whilst they reminisce
In the tragedy
They created for me.

I try to erase the events,
But blood is not lead
So I continue to scribe
Bold statements of pain,
Yet still they ignore.

They ignore
But do they adore
Seeing me shatter,
Breaking me into desolation
With no hope of revaluation,
No longer - can I be saved.

No need for a burial
Because I already weep
A watery grave.
But I ask,
Who is the weaker man?
Is it he who dies by his own hand,
Or they who abolish
The little hope that man had left.

Im sorry that i keep writing you into poetry like you weren't already impossible enough. Love shouldn't feel like walking on glass. Arrange all my pieces into a stained glass window. I want you to fall in love with my colors. Go ahead hang me up with the same pictures your mother loved, I'm looking for home. Im sorry that i thought i found it in your eyes but i have a habit of falling asleep there every night. Next time i will reserve 3am for sleeping. if your heart feels like an inn, i suggest you buy a smaller house. Its all uphill from here. This attic doesn't carry bits of you in its closets. Im learning how to close doors. My lungs have become dusty from not saying your name. At night i breathe in constellations and share secrets between the sheets in my own mind so these days your name rarely gets caught in my mouth. Heres to finally letting go and seeing the sunlight. This is the first day i haven't woken up and checked my skin for your presence. People like you get caught in veins. Im sticking you to poetry, Im hoping one day, this is the only place you'll stay.

Put Body here
so I did

but I don't always
just obey
I'm asked on first dates
to lay it down
to put it out there
I don't
show some respect
you Body idiot
go home

but I put I here

having only one Body
is better than no Body
but the best
is an I Body

if more could see that
they would see more of that
but only on the second date
when you put it that way

I might even put it to you
that
I hear
and obey

is that naughty
of my Body?
so it did

it's good to follow your body
and not your mind
once my mind's made up
I can put it your way