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 Dec 2018 Toni Lane
Emily Miller
My father walked me down the aisle,
But my mother held my arm.
He went with me,
But we went not towards the altar,
But towards the door.

My father walked me down the aisle,
And the ***** rang through the church,
Humming through the elaborate crown molding,
Carved by my ancestors.

He went,
Not beside me,
But before me,
And I watched,
As he was illuminated by the bright,
Overbearing,
Texas sun.

My father walked me down the aisle,
But I did not wear white.
My father walked me in silence,
And I shed tears not for a man standing at the altar,
But for the one I would never see again.

My father walked me down the aisle,
And no veil obscured my face.
All eyes were upon me, but not for my pristine beauty,
Instead for my clenched jaw and furrowed brow,
Severe and fierce to distract from my glassy eyes.

My father did not leave me at the end of our walk to sit beside my mother.
She clung to me for support and sobbed breathlessly,
Loudly,
Unavoidably,
And I carried her with one hand,
My sister the other,
And walked towards my future.
A future family,
Not one person more,
But one person less.
I walked,
One final time,
With him.

My father walked me down the aisle,
And I will never forget it.
Hundreds of eyes isolating my family from the crowd,
Slow and muffled sounds drowning in the deafening beat of my heart,
Blurred faces staring,
Black heels clacking against the cobbled path from the church,
The anguished wails of my mother,
The whimpering of my sister,
And the wooden box that glided before us,
Pulling,
A string tied to our patriarch,
The pin key of our family,
Pulled taut and then snipped with the slam of the hearse doors.

My father walked me down the aisle,
Before I had a chance to grow up.
He walked me,
Out of the church,
Away from the altar,
Never to be walked again.
1090

I am afraid to own a Body—
I am afraid to own a Soul—
Profound—precarious Property—
Possession, not optional—

Double Estate—entailed at pleasure
Upon an unsuspecting Heir—
Duke in a moment of Deathlessness
And God, for a Frontier.
 May 2017 Toni Lane
Devon Haley
sometimes it's like i feel too much.
waves of emotions overwhelm me
and i am powerless against its force.

it's like i feel everything deeper.
canyons and trenches could not compare
to the depths of what makes me, me.

somehow i feel everything for longer.
droughts have ended faster
than i have been able to let go.

my emotions build and dissipate
more quickly than the rain falls.
one minute thunder, the next a rainbow.
 May 2017 Toni Lane
Devon Haley
Life is just a mixture
Of unfortunate circumstances
Wrong people right time
Right time wrong people
Let him go          No
Love him harder      What for
Breathe in and listen to the cars
Passing peacefully outside
Tomorrow is another day
And it's okay to cry
 Mar 2017 Toni Lane
Samm Marie
I miss you something awful
and it hurts real bad.
Today I cried because I realized
You'll never want me back
I'm a mess, I'm a project:
I am charity work you took on.
You loved me and I you,
But in a blink you were gone.
Now I feel like a part of me's missing
Because it liked you more.
I guess I didn't realize
You and I were at war.
Well baby, you win
To the victor do the spoils go.
You have my heart still
And my promise isn't broke.
You're beautiful; spectacular
Please don't change a thing.
I love you, you wonderful man,
Even though to you I am nothing
 Mar 2017 Toni Lane
elizabeth
Beaches are lots of fun,
Until you realize you cannot
Go because your body,
Mind, and soul have been
Cut a million times.
Salt water burns people like me.
March 19, 2017.
I ****** up my body, mind, and emotional state again, and have to figure out a way to get out of going to the beach... I'll probably blame it on school

— The End —