When he asked her
What made her do it,
what pushed her
to such a dark place
The well of excuses
she had used a thousand
dried up from her lips
ground to a halt
“It was the only way to feel good,
an addiction I couldn't help
I needed to do something.”
But nothing she said could fix her mistakes
Under his loving eyes
she squirmed in her nightgown
thin fabric hiding the
scars of a not so distant past
“I don’t understand, why would you
hurt yourself so much?” His words hit her
and her guilt bubbled up
black anger and black words.
“It’s not a big deal.
It’s over. I’ll never do it again.
Keep out of my business.” And the
conversation closed.
But demons are not so easily slayed
and fears, the all consuming
darkness, not so easily
assuaged.
Three weeks he was gone,
not to be back till the sixth
and yet on the fifth late in the night he came
three white roses in hand
ruby red lines painted
her thighs, guilty tears
painted her forced smile
Bad timing or good?
She knew he would yell
He couldn’t understand, wouldn’t understand
blame he had yet to lay
hands clinched for rejection
But he pulled her close
suit soaking up the red
absorbing her pain
clinging to her desperately
“I don’t want to lose you.”
voice raw with love
“I don’t understand, so
help me too”
It was enough for her.
The wall she hand built with such bitter care
shattered, she shook
crying past temptations away
hours wanned, he treated
her wounds, wound up with her on
white sheets, tangled together,
holding her as she spoak
Baring her soul to her swain
she talked until her voice was raw
until the stars faded, and her
burden was lighter than she had thought possible
And after that night
two become closer, every jagged edge
known by the other. They lived for each other
breathed for another
Another time, she could pull herself out of bed
she could open her eyes
and wonder, with that elusive curiosity,
what the day would show her
And the darkness of that endless night
could not push through
the twining of their limbs
and the knotting of their souls
