Lived my whole life
near water or mountains
and lemme tell ya,
there's nothin like wakin up
next to something beautiful.
I spent all of this weekend drinkin,
partyin and just havin an all around
great time with people I love.
This past month, man oh man,
did I seriously have to revisit
some things that I thought I needed
to stay the hell away from, but
whoh how wrong I was.
Jimmy Buffett songs and
Brand New shows,
takin life as it comes
and givin up everything
for a chance at love.
I can write about God
and morality and whatnot
but if I really dig deep down,
what really matters to me
are the quiet moments.
Those seemingly insignificant
memories, such as teaching
my very young cousin #3 how
to fold toilet paper, so that
his *** didn't itch, evidently
his dad couldn't teach him that.
Am I still a boy?
Hell yes I am, and hopefully
always will be, never giving up
that magic, that wondrous sense
of possibility.
Is it a bad thing, that in moments
of forgetfulness I greet my grandmother
as Wendy Lady and she replies, "Hello Boy."?
Do I still watch the Goonies with rapture
and bliss and yell "Hey you guys!!!"
And yet I have walked through fire and death,
seen darkness in all his guises,
lived and ate and breathed horror
as only Conrad can recount.
I can cook, and clean, and provide for myself;
having lived off and on alone for years
so dare you not think me a child,
but my god I'll never give up that
sense of life, that belief and hope
that any and every day may yet be
and adventure worth the telling.
