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Jennifer Cheung May 2010
If I could...
I would have the

long
looong
looooong

s
k
i
n
n
y

legs of a model,

A TINY

   tiny

     t

   iny

WAIST,

beautiful hands

(to wear those byooooootiful RINGS),

and flowy, wavvvvvy locks.

I could wear any sunglasses I wanted

(not just the ones with nose pads)

And still look modest in shorts.

I could be a bit taller,

taller than this

FIVE

FOOT

FRAME

and still look good

in peeptoe

l o
u  bo
u    ti
n     sssss.

I would have glowing

smoooooooooooth skin.

BUT

Despite

wishingwishingwishing

for the perfect body

I still love my

palm-sized lumps,

my blemished spotted uneven skin,

my thick thighs,

and my ugly hands.

At least I can wear high heels

to make me

TALLER.
Written May 9th, 2010
JustJune Sep 2019
Wrestling until exhaustion.

I run miles, never taking a step
Fred McCarthy Nov 2010
I will live my life for you,my love,till i see the bright  light in your eyes fading away

(And here comes a massive storm.....)

I w  i   l l  li    vem   yl  if  ef  oryo u , m yl  ov e , t il l     i  se e  t h e    b  r  i  g h t  li   ght  i n  yo u r e   y esf a d in  ga  w   ay

w  i     L     l  li    vem   yl  if  ef  O    ryo u , m yl  o     VE   t     I    l l       S    e e  t  e    B     r  i  g h t     L   i   ght  IN     y u r e   y esf a      D     in  ga  w   ay

L     lvemyl    O      mylo     VE   t     IS    eete    B   ight     L   ight  IN     yure   yesa  D     ingay

L     my    O    lo     VE        IS    te    B   it     L   t  IN   re   sa  D     iny

L         O          VE        IS        B        L     IN    D

LOVEISBLIND
I just want to be with you daddy
I wish they would understand
I wish they could see who I really am, and not as the person they think I am
Please just come and take me with you!!
Please! ..... Dad please
Mom won't even listen to me anymore!!
She doesn't even care to hear.
I'm not the person everyone is setting me out to be
I'm not my past mistakes...
Your the only one who understands ME!
AND SHE TOOK YOU AWAY!
She robbed me of the time that we could have had.
It's amazing how you can be surrounded an still feel alone....
I remember the first night how it felt when all of a sudden you werent iny life....... I remember HATING God for "letting her push you away" I remember when all of a sudden you wernt there to sing me lulabys, when the books you used to spend hours reading to me had been torn and ripped up from throwing them against the wall.
I remember waking up screaming your name..
Yet no I only wish for you here with me
Just to be where you are
Your the only one who actually listens to me in my family.
Without cheaking your phone while I speak.
I just wish you were here
I'm so lonely
During different journey's you come to different obstacles in your pathway.
Faced with indecision, which way is the best?
Is the most challenging question that you find yourself asking.
Iny-miny-mini-mo used to be a strategy that worked for me.
But when I came to this crossroad that would not do.
So I sat and,
Watched the clouds change as the birds swirled in the air warning all of the storm on the horizon.
Watched as the hands moved around the clock face.
Watched as the numbers changed, seconds, minutes, hours, days, months.
My heart has been captured but I grabbed it back.
Both have entered my dreams.
One welcoming,
One silent.
Who would of thought that I'd miss you even though I don't know you?
Who would of thought I would miss you even though I know I can't have you?
Who would of thought I would crave you when I've only spoken to you twice.
Who would of thought I would of craved you when I've set you free?
Who would of thought that you only came to guide me closer to God and then left having done your mission?
Who would of thought that I only met you to plant a seed within you?
Who would of thought that the first time that you acknowledged me was the last time I would of seen you?
Who would of thought that I would fall in love with you?
Who would of thought two men so different could be so similar and would of had similar impacts on my heart?
But once again I sit down and observe.
Within the silence I enjoy the scenes that are played out before me.
ruby stains Jan 2015
yeah, she laughs [that's what got her *<big>,, that laugh that breaks ricochetting h e a rts and puts three--month--old(s) to shame}
but her heel broke at four am on her way out your back door and her mascara hates rainy days (::and, oh, it was rainy.;;
miriona tāra pēpi : million dollar baby in maorian form.
Tabitha Sullivan Feb 2015
Here I go again
Listening to the rain fall
Spiraling into my own mind
Reaching past my sanity
Drawing out the darkness
Basking in it as if it were light
My past looks like a crime scene
Too much bloodshed and anger
With a suspect who shows no remorse
I hide behind that pretty little smile
Running on that gleam iny eyes
I pull on those clothes to hide my scars
Uh oh I see that, yes that right there
You are looking at me like a wounded puppy
As if I'm merely a broken doll
Sorry to disappoint you hunnie.
I will not be tamed nor shall you repair me
You can climb over all the walls you want
My heart is a dead end maze
It doesn't not make a path to the center
Just winds you around until you're lost too
Please don't come any closer
I will reach out to help you but I'll still fall
I'll pull you back onto the sandy shore
While I drown beneath it all
It is okay my dear do not cry for
You can still find mr past my sanity
There I have the release I crave most
Knowing here not even I can hurt myself
Nor can I bring harm to those I love
So here I go once again
As the thunder rolls in and the lights dim
I'm basking in the brightest darkness
The darkness from within
adel Pacheco Jun 2014
I'm finally happy
Never thought I would
It happened
And now I see bright
But yet still have a lighter
I'm not as violent as I was
I fount what I wanted
I never been so happy iny life
She said yes after saying no
But now I have so much hope
Now  I'm happy
Life my girlfriend, love her
Santiago Feb 2015
I know I haven't kept in touch
Carino I'm going through so much
I miss those all nighters with you
Just know I'm stuck like glue
Whenever you're feeling blue
I'm right there beside you
Remember my heart remains
Your soul ran through my vains
Settled in and called it home
Hasn't left still lives their alone
Through you I grew never knew
Had no clue but it's true
Thank you for this blessing
Always & Forever imy ily iny
H
wordvango Sep 2014
What way is the way
                 to go?
Thinking about death
                 morose ?
Or is it prescience
                planning?
To die how and why?

What improbable event
                 possible(Eventual)
can call my undertaking
                 this event,
Fire , gunshot, heart
                 attack!
C ** king uh on *****
                 *****
regurgitates into  my esoph-
                  agus.
Whilst a nightmare turns into re-
                  al(ity+)        
Not one to shudder
                  i stroke
(genius) all of us to our dest-
                  iny.
Mateuš Conrad Mar 2021
i will attest to this much...
sometimes i sit this canvas and pretend to wonder:
they are not phonetic wars...
we are all somehow literate...
the priesthood relaxed rules for
"dyslexia": we can be noted as having
education in sound encoding...
pretty ******* late if
you ask me...
bad internet connection: primo...
and there i was thinking that
being honest could be equated to water...
how it might flow...
instead... i'm served up with a
crab-bucket of connectivity "issues"...
no... just plain bunny dandy:
you're not up for hopping this day....

i'll have to melt some copper ore
ask two Glaswegians to fight over
a penny to finally invent something
akin to copper wire...
too many interruptions...
it's almost as if all the things
that fly... are supposed to follow Icarus suite...
but no...

a little autobiographical nibble 'ere...
a little over "der"...
i see an apostrophe like i might
pretend to not see a letter
that has to become a surd...
again... i sit before this canvas...
which isn't much of a canvas...

i will take forever to make time
a concise redemption dimension
while attesting to the mere presence
of clouds...
hardly "rolling"...
but clouds are best for:
lest swans and castles...
come the night...
and more... time-keepers of what's
best to engage with THought
without a moral... ought...

all these technicalities...
i need a canvas...
shapes & colours that they ought to be...
instead...
i have these skeletons...
before the altar of God i'm climbing
this impossibility of how words
are wasted...
wasted on: bucra

a litany of best kept: to themselves...
even though i'm willing to contest
that orange, as a colour...
well... it's half as bad given a priori...
organic status...
orange is bad...
           but not when it's an orange... fruit...
or tinsel town or a trek 5 marlin bicycle...
orange is bad when
it's highten-tenet-tightened...
      as a detail... colour is detail:
otherwise to compose shapes...
here i am... bug-frightened hollow in sound...
looking at skeletons...
skeleton lettering... sounds that might
make it into the encycloepedia...
make it into an...

           because that's the correct "spelling"
of the word...
rigid: BULFAR...
    i just invented a word and it's a noun...
noun: posit place, state, origin, temperament,
and time... not a verb...

i write but i want colour...
paradox... i should have been a painter
detailing: not oxymoron,
not philosophy not true or, truant...
excesses in punctuation...
capture sounds... raise them toward
a status of letters...
have to have that
bored-up... pluck-my-eyes out
attitude toward deity...

   but when the sentencing resounds
via: god = word...
i conjure up the exhausting
use of words in all that...
forest that could have remained but
otherwise became...
pile on pile on...
a congested pike of amnesia-work
of... that still elusive spelling of...
fwench... table...
alias... bew-row...

phonetically that's how it looks...
ugly... beau-rho...
bew-row...
      biu-ro-kra-si...

that i write i have to cringe before
god while all other phonetic encodings
are wasted because
there's some dynamic of "authority"
involved because...
a handshake and a word-from-mouth
apiece is not enough to settle score
that i don't need to belittle man
that man belittles himself... galore...
is...

   a revision of punctuation at best...
punctuation being considered an
inter-verbum dynamic and since
in english there's no apparent
inter-verbum dynamic or the use
of diacritical markers...
the whole canvas the point of...
   let's pretend it's almost chess-esque...
this... chicken-scratching
scribblin' ol' me...

encyclopedia... that's apparently correct...
but it's underlined...
so there's a missing Siamese grapheme
waiting to be discovered...
rules... again: rules...
maybe... some greek?

i write China less as caron chasing doubles...
but more like the greek Xa Xa Xa laughter...
which became odd when reading sort of
Spanish of ja-ja-ja-ja...
     bothersome this... H this "e"...
this h... this "M"... **** it the letters
are toying with Copernicus...
no... they're not... but i'm also not equipped
with a compass... either...
who said compas and not compass
who said... the former looks ugly
the latter looks pretty?
and who objected to this language
being so "raw" phonetically?

en-sigh-clo-***-d-ya...
    d-ia...
       jumbling vowels together like it's
a spectacle of a tornado but
there's not ******* wind or
flush in the toilet...
great urn of mammon! speak!
hollow out... let's pretend otherwordly
dictates of supposing agony...

it's not like the english languge could ever
be undermined...
low risk status...
how they speak Fwench
BUT how they rrrrite it... emphasis on a
trill: rather than a Hark... X...
is another boulder of sort, "problem"...

but most certainly this is not painting...
if i were painting i wouldn't be
x-raying... these words these bones...
i'd have fully gravitating forms
and i'd have colours...
i'd be detailing clouds as not
swans or Rembrandt castles
and all "things" psychiatry prone...
i wouldn't be drinking red wine
wanting more: sugar...
more... water!

i relaxed today being inspected
by a female barber...
god... impromptu: i wanted to **** her...
she cut my hair like i might have
had a *******...
bartablondine: blonde moustache...
sodden tricklet...
these details of hair left most exposed...
from ***** to the chin:
yes... the mythological status
of chin and jaw-lineage...
hardly Finnish...

        but the hands on the head
felt most relaxing...
i pretended to doze off...
i only might wished for a whipping
of a non-existent *******
in a furry of pouching... cushion esque
lips...
then again: it might have taken me
a year or so, +, in having finished
reading a Pickwick Papers'... monthly..
entry... which it was...
serial praise...

ava lauren ava lauren....
****-tiptoe a sacred nugget of ****...
less concern in Cyrilic than in
any other... phonetically encoded a...
as in ah-sigh...
variant... denoting more vis-a-vis
aLPHA...
        prime suspect... supposedly...
no...

again.... what alleviates me from
not, to, stressing the sound
encoded in a letter
red is red...
blue isn't exactly black..
BL
BL
                 -ue
                 -ack...

hardly denoting it playing a...
******* fiddle... a violin...
when i am making excuses for a take
on volume while stroking my beard
and not a ferret...
chance me! you catch me a squirrel...
i'll denote you
both Robin and the ******* of Nottingham!

a paradise for opened oysters....
at least... gulped... down...
sobering...
slobbering tow: two...
              i slither i slobber...
this agitating moon...
this agitating closure... sun... exposed...
this, "somehow"...
all EU funding went into
a motto: all autobahns feed the traffic
toward... WARSAW...

but i'm hardly living... that sort of...
a... "sein und zeit"...
i'm not living this variation
of a congested marathon:
i have hours, there's a day...
walking a sum-up 'un of it
is not to my ******' liking...
i'll be adamant when licking
a Romanian **** or a ******* strawberry...
because ****** are ****** last
and **** first...

i miss ******* like i miss:
not being made tough:
experienced in a demand for flimsy filming it...
a mirror is / was an undermining
project... granules...
soothsayers... whip-em-silent...nibbling...

my beard 'airs are not like my
*****...
trim my 'ucking gravity of the brows:
assumed...
before...
left alone... this tired...
this creasing: too much...

  this knee at the altar of a beggar
come: nuance England via
an adhan...
not, e-nuff... / enough...
  call it hue of 'ringe
how can GHETTO:
                 how can... scrap of meats...
     linger like so...

in these letters... borrow some...
like... **** no...
no russian no prussian no austro-hungarian
leaves me gravitating to timid...
bottle of wine, solid...
i'll be leaving having
attained status of a St. Petersburg
grade 0 tourist...

i abhor writing...
each time i excavate this canvas
i'm tying myself to a deity outside of
a polytheism...
how does... multi-purposive...
functioning... plethora...
extension... jargon... loot...

    my cracking of egg shells...
my little Xiny...
chase...
             the plurality word
form for a people...
Xiny - ce-ha-iny...
    like Niem-cy...
             not exactly germs...
more like brick... mortar...
a bottle of wine...

a bottle of bricks...
i expect no wine...
i somehow envision a chance
for a trickle...
i want a teddy... a Theodore...
i want a: HWAM...
what's that?
phonetically it's... Barking &
Dagenham...
colourfully...
fit for a flurry...
it's a... pigeon *******
on a top-hat... *******...
spectacular...me... you are
assigned to heave...
a Forrest Gump from
a Forrest Gate in between
the A406 and... what's that
"blunder" in the middle...
between Ilford and St. Paul's and...
the praising of hybrid... walling...

i heard a piano... crash & fall...
i heard the skimming off details...
i heard the tired affair of circumcision
like i might hear
the grass being mowed
of the hair hair being trimmed...
i heard the donning of the kippah...
i heard so much i hardly forgot
tuning to deaf... dear me...
i heard a piano fall...
i heard a chandelier succumb to...
i was willing to borrow a barrel...
i forgot to can the laughs...
honest to god...
everyone is supposed to forget
to can the laughs...

otherwise we're dealing with androids...
aren't... we?
by all the possible exfoliation of mannerism
to breed a sense of concern:
of Heidegger's da-sein: of being-there:
as opposed to there's-being
i cannot, but, feign...
the football season hasn't begun yet
so the tribalism usually associated with
club factions disappears
for a while, in tune: in harmony and rhythm:
what's the difference between
harmony and rhythm?
i think that's an authentic question to ask...
but given the current atmosphere
of the Olympic games:
look! we all know that Duplantis won that
competition fair and square:
but if you managed to watch woman's
synchronized swimming event:
that French team's belly flop with gymnastics
at the opening of the routine
was not deserving a first placement...
the Italians shrugged it own with a clean
feet first incision of the water...
but Olympics is not a tribal sport:
not fanatical...
fanatical pacifism:
but that's not what controls the mob with
mindless stupor...
i'm yet to find an intelligent drinker...
i hone in on the poison and utilize it beyond
comparison:
for me it's really a question
of:

aqua

       status quo:

today i woke up at 7:30...
i didn't have to:
now i'm writing this at 12:00 exact...
and i feel like i have only woken  up
at 11:00am...
but i just spent the past three hours
talking to my baby
and in intervals of bad internet
connection

21sec
18min
22sec
25 sec 30min
18sec 22 sec
18min

   unless the Empress is streaming and
cutting off our connection
i would imagine this is a game
you're playing:

the cat came out to play with a mouse
went into the garden to sniff
at the evergreen tree
in my garden:
noticed a fly:
then noticed me...
yes: i was that, once...

         when the lord of the flies
came face to face with the lord
of mosqutos
mosquitos:
quitos: piquant: moss: mosquicktoes?

**** me... mosque of the quick toes?
Mt. Niqab?
and i said to him:
what a strange fruit...
this bread soaked in wine:
what a strange fruit...
don't you think? Lord Jesus Lord Christ
Lord of MOSQUITOES...
what a strange fruit:
this wine soaked slice of bread:
don't you think?
and what a strange tree:
on a Hill the Barren Hill of Golgotha...
were you trying to be me?
Cosmopolitan Messiah
O belittling Rome...

            for all the canvas of free speech:
more then: worth more then than
worth now:
people debate free speech
but we're talking free speech to zombies
and ditto-heads
of the journalistic mantras:
no one is bothered about free speech
as such:
people are just bothered
about not being heard
because everyone is so fat, docile,
intimidated by the luxuries of life on offer
than confusion seeps through
and debilitates even more:
numbs and doesn't confront:
the grand anesthetic for life
which comes from the anesthetic toward
the piquant pleasures bound
to pain...

of course the riots are happening!
too much sport!
you are televising too much sport
on the t.v.:
people will get bored
from being average:
not from soap opera antics
of the football pitch
that mindless sport...
with pundits blah blah and that sports
commentary for football is
a graveyard shift by the choice of
words: these days...

people are having a frenzy
being exposed to the Olympics:
after years of routine in mindlessly following
football...
seriously...
some honor some prestige is involved
in competing at the Olympics:
but then the Chinese can't be snubbed
for doping:
yeah: they took the alternative route:
they went meta-human on the rest of "us"
and started to genetically engineer
people...
but that's not inhumane to think about:
it would be inhumane of me to think that
i am an incubator of pinworms:

/ 'iny, parasitic nematodes that live
in the intestines and lay eggs
on the skin around the **** /

i had to copy and paste those words...
that's why there's an apostrophe instead of a T
for the word: tiny: heiny hieny high-knee
  heinee...      English is so ******* ****:
no clear phonetic correlation
to what letters are used what letters
are said: no proper vowel to consonant
correlation in no syllabary...
of the Japanese:
or the Polacks: Samatrians...

even the Aryan Deutsche:
i never said ihr: ich or isch?
ich is IX
       but isch is iś: which is almost Croat...
funny this daydreaming
like i don't have a day to live...
but what can you do:
when in love you primarily love to talk
when in love you love to listen
when in love
you love to communicate like never before

c'echa... the apostrophe there indicates
a stress
to surgically cut into the word
with both sound and meaning:
since the two are dichotomous rather than
by dualism-bound...

you think i have pin-worms?
really?
so you've been reading into my dreams:
my mortal show of horror
of becoming came in the version
of Pinhead: the priest of hell...
and now you're telling me
i should de-worm myself on a regular
basis because children don't
wash their hands after taking a ****?

wait wait... so i wasn't so special
having attempted ******* aged 8?
children are ******* flirtatious?
seriously?
so the question is how one controls
infantile: born of original sin: flirtations?
it's so original that it's actually
a duplicate: that the original sin
is actually: plagiarism:
that's inherent for the survival of the species?

that's when god realized:
****! i didn't create anyone as unique as me!
i just create another sea!
i just create ants!
but ants that share my understanding
for and of potential
but there will be so many averages
and only few glimmers of hope for me
to push through a Newton...
but average is good: Sir...
average is good: if you have a Her...
i don't mind being average i don't mind
being a security officer
i don't mind being a taxi driver:
provided i can have Frankenstein's Bride
and a Bridge to you:
with many thanks, Sir...
i don't mind being demeaned by some hierarchy
that does no align with your existence
in the presence of fleeting butchery of intent
and genuine authority of the pen...

there was more freedom of speech
when people were not exposed to literacy...
but since the advent of literacy
freedom of speech is debatable
because you'd think that
by being given the crafts
kept hidden and secret for so long
by a priestly class...
it's not a crisis of Christianity:
it's a crisis of literacy:
the ******* idiots walked into that one
on the blind...

the priests used to be the literate ones...
but now?
everyone is literate:
but as literate as their literacy mistakes show:
too throw: not to soon: my son...
but yeah:
throw into the mix the unearthing of
the Nag Hammadi library...
as R.D. Laing
opened a book with... citing St Thomas:

Jesus said to them:
when you make the two one, and
when you make the inner as the outer
and the outer as the inner and the above
as the below, and when you make
the male and female into a single one,
so that the male will not be male
and the female not be female, when you
make eyes in the place of an eye,
and a hand in the place of a hand,
and a foot in the place of a foot,
and an image in the place of an image,
then shall you enter the Kingdom...

mischievous ******* *******...
because what Socrates said was a dialogue:
you couldn't turn that into a religion...
how much dialogue do you get
in the Bible?
how much dialogue in the Quran?
so someone is always: just listening...
taking orders...
what about a back-and-forth?

too much sport created this rift!
too much sport on t.v.!
the averages came out and out-performed
other averages and disappeared
or will soon disappear into oblivion
out of sheer respect for the roulette of life
the chance to excel
but not milking it... that's what Olympians
ought to represent:
not some celebrity stature of being
like children given candy
these people and money are like children
and candy... sugar rush of no poetic justice...

it's still Jesus trying to revamp the Genesis story...
the serpent on the tree
the tree just morphed into a crucifix
and the apple became a wine soaked loaf of bread!
**** me! that's it!
hey presto, job done.

— The End —