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Alan McClure Nov 2010
Betty Botter bravely brought her
best out putting pen to paper
built a book both brave and brittle
based it on the bitter battle
she had fought to beat the bottle
blossomed bigger, better, brighter
got the right to be a writer
Brought the book to Bertie Baxter
Baxter's Bookstore's biggest buyer
but the buyer was no biter
he thought vampire books were better
Tried to bate her and berate her
and belittle Betty Botter
bad benighted ******* bade her
"Be more like the bigger hitters!"
Better bet your bottom dollar
Betty Botter's ****** bitter.
Someone else could probably do this better, but hey-**.
One a time upon an egg,
it was the wall that fell,
and jack had fallen up the hill,
and empty was the well.

The frog had kissed the princess,
and a wart had blossomed there,
And the old lady had no children,
in a house she lived quite fair.

And while Mary's lamb stayed in the field,
Ms. Muffet ate porridge instead,
And the mice could really see quite well,
and the stout little tea *** was made out of lead.

This is the land I live in,
Of backward tales you see,
For while I am quite young and fair,
There is no Prince to rescue me.

And here the hare really won the race,
because he was so fast.
And Daisy then said yes to marriage,
without even being asked.

And the Bears invited Goldiehair-
(She didn't have the curls).
And here the wolves both big and bad,
Didn't eat little pigs or red-hooded girls.

The kittens never lost their mittens,
And King Cole let the black birds fly,
And Mary just grew pickles,
And the littlest piggy didn't cry.

This is the land I live in,
Of backward tales you see,
For while I am quite young and fair,
There is no Prince to rescue me.

And while one Jack demanded gold
from the man who offered beans,
Another landed on a candle stick
And burned right through his jeans.

And while Grandma now lives by route 62,
the river and woods cleared away.
London Bridge never fell,
But they'll tear it down too someday.

Old McDonald had no pets
and Ms. Mary Mack dressed in blue.
And this Old Man just walked home,
And oh! One, two, we tied our shoes!

This is the land I live in,
Of backward tales you see,
For while I am quite young and fair,
There is no Prince to rescue me.

And while Jack Horner sat at the table
to say “What a bad boy am I!”
All the children laughed and played
While the witch enjoyed her pie.

And little boy blue and brother john
always wake up on time.
And the little girl bought the ginger bread man,
from the baker, for just a dime.

And while Mrs. Betty Botter ordered pizza,
and the goose laid a silver egg,
the cradle was safe in the new tree house,
and we walked to our loos on two legs.

And we all know the Muffin Man,
who sells coffee now.
And the moon up there, he really wished,
He could jump over the cow.

And the wheels on the bus don't go round anymore,
we all take the train,
and the farmer finally moved out of the dell,
the busy house was a pain.

And all the stars here twinkle,
and we don't fall around the rosie,
the weasel is to nice to pop any more,
and bed made of peas, the princess is cozy.

This is the land I live in,
Oh who is that at the door?
Oh, go away young, fair Prince,
There is no one here to rescue, anymore.
Abi Carroll Mar 2021
Pigtails of plenty,
yellow scrunchies,
and purple plaid.

"You're only you,
I'm pleased as punch,
I'm only glad".

Peter Piper and Betty Botter
picked some peppers
and bought some butter,

Too many rhythms,
too many rhymes,
too much to say,
too little of time.

I hear not to run,
I'm asked what's the rush.
The more that I rush
and the faster I run,
the sooner I'll reach
my great big fun.

Shoe laces bug
big fun
they do.

"They do.

Your speech is peaches
your pace is pie
the space you use
is more than fine".

I try to explain
the colors I play;
going with guidelines
is only a game.
Skipping through gardens
of boxes that make
splendid presents
to open
and fun blocks
to break.

"They're only toys,
you're precisely right".

Meaning is found
in circles on paper,
when pencils make the path.
I see signs in the sky
and in my mind
that for others
seek to hide.
Sometimes it's first fantasy;
another time is reality

If you listen to me,
if you'll hear what I say,
you can learn to see colors,
and can stop seeing grey

"You're sight is unique,
you're special indeed,
but you aren't set apart,
left out,
or alone.

I believe".

The happiness I've found
I can't express.
Clapping
and stomping
and spinning around
aren't enough
to catch
the feelings I've felt.

"Your words aren't just sound,
they're a song to be sung;
felt by each
bringing glasses to sing
one by one,
to echo
to ring".

Every coin has two sides...

Aches that I feel
I can't explain.
Big tears have fallen
that haven't told you pain.
Sharper to chip,
heavier to break,
louder to shake
I wish they were.
They chip, break, and shake
but you can't feel my aches.
I can't explain what's real
when it's only felt inside.

"You don't have to stress about
why you feel what you feel.
There might not be a why
but it's fair and it's real.

I know how hard
it is to live here,
for you to allow,
but it's not forever,
it's only for now".

I promise to slow down
I'll be quieter I swear
I won't reach higher than my height
I won't choose left over right
Believing without sight
is for children not my height
I'll draw squares that are not round
and play games you'll understand
with children on the playground
not alone in this box of sand

"You promise every year to be shy,
to not run,
to not trip,
to not cry big cry's.

This year promise to be you,
to wear plenty of pigtails
with purple plaid
with yellow scrunchies

with some breaths unallowed.
Like the breath that lives
between a sentence
wasting time
if only for an instant.

Jimminy Crickets
and Holy Cow,
I know.

Even though it's hard,
although you're awfully sad,
try to love this special you;
it's the only you to have
and to hold
and to hug
right now.

I'll skip with you
and hold your hand.
I'll hear your words,
the one's unsaid.
I'll sit by you

and be your friend.
Brent Kincaid Apr 2016
I like to rub her righteous
Rubber baby buggy bumpers
While her Sister Susie
Sells seashells by the sea shore.
Susie works in a shoeshine shop,
She sits, and she shines all day long.
She confesses with too many esses
It lispers up her whispered song.

Peter Piper picking peppers
Putting pickled peppers in a ***.
Woodchuck chucked wood,
Chuckling, chucked the wood he got.
Susie’s sister Betty Botter
Bought a pound of bitter butter.
Betty was a bit of a ******.
She said her butter was better bitter.

I thought of a thought, thinking
It was a very difficult thing to occur.
Thinking, busily thinking;
Blinking, and winking, thinking of her
We made a date at a quarter to eight
Said, “I’ll see you at the gate, don’t be late.”
Lucky and plucky, my ducky doo,
It was a heavy date, and a heavy gate.

Leary of a really weary *****
We wandered in our wandering leathers
Wondered if whether wetter
Weather were better to weather together.
We celebrate our late date
We didn’t skate, or deliberate our fate
Suffice is to further elucidate
And cheerily chewed the churros we ate.
Tekan Jan 2019
My klein Ouma
smeer haar liefde
soos botter

Sy smeer van kant tot kant
en gee liefde orals,
wat langsaam versmelt in die deug
van haar sagte brood

My klein Ouma se liefde
vul al die gate in die warm brood

“Niks is beter as brood nie”
Is wat Ouma altyd se

En tog, is sy verbasend klein …
Sy eet net die krummels
en gee vir ander
haar gebotterde brood
so gesond
so lekker

My klein Ouma
Vol liefde gesmeer
An Afrikaans poem written for my gran
Classy J Apr 2023
Draped in the Dior,
Gold diggers treat me like I’m Superman,
But I ain’t their saviour.
Materialism has turned some into caveman’s.
Entitled Karen’s that scream for the manager.
******* unenlightened specimens.
Dimes thinking they diamonds…
Yeah, diamonds from the dollar store.
Don’t look now, Donald Sutherland!
Affairs don’t fair well, at least for the common man.
Where it’ll leave em more down under than an a Australian.
And if a baby come in the picture,
It’ll cost ya just ask Nick Cannon.
Gotta keep that 100 acre wood in check,
& definitely don’t forget to protect ya neck.
Uh…
******* think I’m eeyore,
These ****** named sally;
Don’t know **** outside a seashore.
If they only knew;
I stemmed more hams than Seymour.
I may not understand the matters of the heart,
But I do understand it’s all the same in the dark.
Smell the blood in the water,
Yeah baby I’m the shark.
But before things get to serious,
Like a good old sailor I will depart.
Because I’m A most wanted man, like Phillip Hoffman.
That will never lose their decorum, unlike Roseanne.
Because I’ve witnessed worse ****,
Than x-mans last stand.
******* think I’m ludicrous.
Although I’ve had good chicks and bad chicks,
I believe that the comparison is superfluous.
Also, I’m not that fast nor furious!
But I am on the cusp of greatness,
While others are stuck in stasis.
The same ones whose words,
Are more cheap than Payless.
******* be like Betty Botter,
They be bitter and bother brothers.
That butter em up till they toast.
Should’ve listened to the warnings of my mother.
But it’s hard when you’re pride, not the only thing being stroked.
****, gotta watch out for ***’s and robbers.
Gotta watch out, because consequences have a cost.

— The End —