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 Jan 2020 stargazer
mysa
mud
 Jan 2020 stargazer
mysa
mud
face up on the ground
rain hits my face
i have been here before
lying in the mud
slowly enveloping me
like a hug
or perhaps more like a boa constrictor
my skin pulls upward
towards the stars
towards light
while my bones want nothing more
then to be laid to rest
wrote this one back in september. don't rly remember what was goin on when i wrote this but that's how it be man i'm just vibin
 Jan 2020 stargazer
Lauren Leal
Actions speak louder than words,
You wonder why I'm speechless.
 Jan 2020 stargazer
R B M
I love it when
In the middle of your chorus class
You break down crying
Because today is the day you pick songs for comps
And you knew it was coming
And you sit back
Debating whether or not you should go for it
Pick a solo

And while you're there debating this,
You slowly realize
That you're not good at singing
You'd fail so easily
You're so bad at it
And you don't deserve a solo
And you'd literally break if you failed
And so you shouldn't
You just shouldn't go for it
Even though this--singing--is one of the biggest, most important things to you
You sing every day and music is practically your life
But you don't believe in yourself
So yeah, you just shouldn't go for this moment

And you hadn't even started crying yet
You are just slowly getting there
Slowly realizing that you **** at this
You don't believe in yourself
But you hadn't started crying
Just on the edge
Of tears

But you do start crying because the last thing you wanted to do
Was talk about how you don't believe in yourself
And then your friends come over and sit next to you
And you can tell that they're expecting you to say something
Tell then why you look like you're about to cry
And then you do--- cry.
And you don't want to explain why

So you just sit there waiting for the last five minutes
Before you get to go home early
Crying
Shaking your head no, and crying
Because the one thing you want to be good at
The one thing you work so hard for
You don't believe in yourself for
I am upset,
there is nothing more poetic than that right?
didn't all great poets write about great sadness?

is this is my muse--why am i in pieces?
i am full of questions with no one to answer them.
i've been telling myself time heals all

but its been so ******* long already.
When will time heal me?
because I am running out of time.
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