If you aren't thinking about it all the time, is it really love?

Love is found not
in fixation
obsession and attraction to
the point of abstraction.
Love does not demand
sacrifice of soul and will,
sitting still, sifting
through emotional ruminants.
Love does not need me.

Love is what I need to be.

(S)he finds me trapped
strength sapped
and gives me heart to heart
resuscitation.
This is love.
I am free to die and weep
and hate and wallow;
love is unfettered by languish,
not lackluster if let to age.
In time, we find, we see the truth
of love's supposed strength in youth,
and instead see
antiquity
grows vines around our walls, and through
windows and doors, inside and out.
Now, when we crumble into dust,
our framework cracks like cheap glass,
we find this love, slow and insidious,
to be the only thing holding us aloft.
*This is your heart becoming mine.

Yesterday morning
I envied your ambition into your studies and that you finished school with such good results.
I respected you for the kindness you showed to each and everyone and
I admired the massive amount of compassion residing inside you.
I smiled at your youthful craziness with which you lightened my life.
I protected you as much as I could, even if I looked like a desperate idiot.
... yesterday morning I loved you.

Yesterday evening
I labeled your words as lies and marked the actions that identified them.
I shooked my head in disbelief over your efforts to get rid of your kind and passionate self, thus
I smirked diabolically, knowing that you will never find peaceful happiness by his side.
I rendered myself in agony over the things you had done without even caring a bit about me and
I looked with disgust at the face of yours, wishing I could fill it with pain and sorrow.
... yesterday evening I hated you.

Today
I woke up with an aching head, having drunk too much at the party the night before.
I remarked the ray of sunlight dancing on the new pictures I put on my wall the week before.
I checked my account showing the last payment after I got fired at work the month before.
I repeated the moves which we learned in self defense courses I started three months before.
I looked in the mirror staring at the man you ditched six months before.
... today everything was without you.

*But why is it then, that I still can't forget you?

a great country with greater ambitions for all
i don't know where i would be if not here
a country worth fighting for
because we all wake up with smiles on our faces
we share every bit we have among us
even though our winters try to cover the rising of the sun
our sun never hesitated to rise
i have no words to express the greatness of this nation
because it's too great to find the exact words
our winters are the coldest
but somehow we always find a way to keep ourselves warm
if holding the door for you, we do it real good
if saying hello, we will be the first you hear it from
we might not be famous in the world of acting or singing
but we are famous and known for being polite
which is a million times worthy
i don't want to sound like bragging
but really this nation has stolen my heart
in a way a boy has never done before
i was not born here, nor am i a native of this ground
i have wondered looking for love and peace
and only here in this nation did i find my heart
i will not be ashamed to hold the flag of this nation
i will not be ashamed to sing the anthem of this nation
the growing of a tree tells a story in this nation
from east to west we rise every day with greater determination
the fireworks of this significant day will end today
but they will keep firing in our hearts for this nation
the smell of the grass of this nation washes away pain,
and when you step on the grass of this nation it brushes you with care
on a rainy days the sky drop low that it gives you a feeling,
and provokes you to believe you can climb
and reach the skies along with a friend.
on a sunny days, the sun gets bright that it makes you
want to talk to any stranger on the sidewalk.
I am inlove with this nation.
i came from a very far land, but this land has become my only home.
i don't care who says i don't belong because my heart say i belong