On the ******* express
Knowing its Bound to crash
But all i care about
Is the smell of the gas
Of pure white snow
Heavenly shimmering
In the moonlights glow
Going through tunnels
The darkness shows
This pure white snow
Is darker than expected
But yet i have to test it
Knowing the train will crash
The faster it goes
The shorter it lasts

Endless bounds of joy
Accompanied by chains of sorrow
For this bond i make with you
Will cost me tomorrow
You may take me any day
Like the wind, just gone away
For you make me happy
For you take away the pain
Only temporarily
Do i ever feel sane
You make sunny days turn to rain
Yet i turn to you
Looking for answers
Inside of a brew

Corrupting the innocent
Yet leading them to freedom
Preventing them from harm
yet they still call me evil
escape from this prison
Which they call sobriety
Into another
of different of society

Forever lost in a thought
Never remembering what was forgot
As Many Memories fade
Fewer memories get made
Why am i here
I'm just wasting my time
As i write
High as a kite
All i can think
Is why why why
“Why what”
I'm not to sure
Why to everything
“That's just absurd”
“You're living the life
That many people crave”
That is true
But This is not what i chose
But what i was gave
Yes it is good
Yes it is wonderful
But something's not right
Every second feels like fight or flight
This is a life
This is not a fight
An internal struggle
Between dark and light
I miss sobriety
As if it was a dear friend
Knowing i'll never meet then again
Until the very end

With every pill i take
And with every bottle i drink
Liquor by the lakes
My bodies shutting down
Slowly but surely
Death is for where im bound
To be 6 feet under the ground
Laying in my bed,
Dead
Only to be found
Pills in my hand
Bills on my desk
Empty bottles laying around
Now i take this eternal rest
With no one around
I took pills my the mounds
I drank bottles by the rounds
But still no regrets to be found
If I got another chance
I’d still make every mistake
The Bottles made me dance
The Pills put me in a trance
An emancipation from sobriety
The **** of society

with love comes pain
peaks of happiness
valleys of misery
droplets of rain
a breath stolen
deep within the chest
never to be returned
not even after death
lay at rest
calmed by thoughts
alarmed by what it brought