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 Mar 2017 Emma
winter sakuras
Breathing in the rich hot air, is a budding dark red rose;
tall and triumphant it grows, jutting out its vivid green thorns for a naive deer to witness,

the scent of spices in the heavy air from my mom’s cooking is inhaled by the flowers and weeds, both intertwined and gleefully bursting out towards the welcoming daylight,

the leaves of parched trees whistle and sway with the occasional hot breeze
and the wind chimes dance with raw tunes, glistening in the thick heat,

I scrunch my face and glare at the sizzling white sky
where the sun lord shines with no restraint on my messy dark haired head,
right through my ripped blue shorts and light purple tank top,

walking barefoot from scalding rough concrete onto scratchy green grass
towards the lawn chair shaded underneath the tall dark pine tree,
I sit and take a sip of my icy cold cherry coke, popping chewing gum in my mouth

as I lean back to read To **** A Mockingbird by Harper Lee,
enjoying a light daydream of Atticus Finch
with the sleeves of his white shirt rolled up in the tangible summer heat,

just like the guy standing and looking out the living room window
of the house across from mine, gulping down icy cold beer
and watching with vague interest the girl with bare feet lounging on her front lawn, sweat dripping off her neck like droplets of cold water coursing down a melting icicle,

I look up, shading my eyes to watch a noisy jet fly high in the sky
leaving behind a vacuum of white fluffy clouds in the shapes of loops and swirls
I grin; somehow they spell my name in jagged humid strips of air,

the screen door swings open with a loud creak, followed by the sound of my mom hollering my name,
I sneak one last glance at the guy who looks like Atticus Finch,
and leave him to be alone with the heat as I head inside.
 Mar 2017 Emma
winter sakuras
I want you to see
that in this world of white and black,
there is color to be found.

Even if you have to look through
the cracks and crevices in sidewalks and buildings
look behind closed signs, through empty storefronts

gaze into the starless
falling eyes of the boy next door
trying to remember what the night sky looked like

you will find them
because all lost things,
are meant to be found
one day in the end.

wow! just wow~
can you remember the flowers
the cherry blossoms that were your favorite because
you thought they smelled like me

the blue blue sky
the endless ocean of tears

and the stars
that were white
but dripping with every color

and you,
you are a rainbow,
not the one everyone expects

but a rainbow
of pain, solitude, forgiveness,
love (as hard as it is to believe),
and life.
for those whose shine is hidden by the world's contempt
 Mar 2017 Emma
winter sakuras
I am lost
within the trembling threshold
of my life.

Days merging together
voices dragging, dripping
with illusion

I sit there
and listen,

I walk
to and fro,

I eat
and eat and
eat
only to throw it all back up.

I come back to
my bittersweet, lovely
poetry

I read
and read
liking
collecting every word
every tear shaped phrase and longing sigh,

There is
a mass of monsters
their collective voices
drilling
into my head,
tearing at
my chest

Shut up
please,
take back
the excuses

I'm just
trying
to be a good person,

but you all
are making it
so difficult.

Don't
give me what I don't want,
I don't care--
about anything.

Oh my god

I never
asked,
for any of this.

But
this is
what I was given

although
I hate it so much,
there's nothing I can do.
the most truthful someone like me could be
 Mar 2017 Emma
winter sakuras
I stumble out of bed with
tangled hair and blurry, scrunched up eyes
I brush my teeth
grab the pink and blue contacts
(the ones I can't see out of without
humanity's fakeness)
because the world is blurry without them
I need to wash my face, but
the water is too cold
and my hands are warm and dry
I switch on the lamp, flip open the laptop
ruffle the papers with
the problems and words neatly lined up
row after row after row
I need to do work, but
it's too cold
no, not the weather
just inside,
inside me, where my heart is
so, can I write some poetry?
No no no, the work's due tomorrow
I need to pull my life together
figure out what to do with it,
but, I don't want to do anything
but, I have to do everything
I used to care
but then I realized that I didn't,
wait, I can't let them know that:
that I'm one of those people who
wants to scribble curses and ****** truths no one wants to hear
onto pieces of paper and feed them to the wind,
that I can
look into people's eyes and smile
when really, I want to spit into their faces and tell them how fake they are
what do I want to do with my future?
oh, this and that, tell'em what they want to hear
how you look up to their so called
lives of success and prosperity,
how suffering is
living in the moment while
real happiness
is sitting in a box and staring at a computer screen
talking through gritted teeth because
you might say something wrong,
covering yourself in bright colors
suits, ties, 5 inch high heels, red (not black or white) lipstick
because you might accidentally show them
who you really are
but ****,
you all don't anything real about life
so I hope you live it smiling fake smiles
crying fake tears
laughing fake laughs
living fake
and dying a real death,
because that's what you all
made everyone else do
and that's
what you made me do
and I,
curse you for it.
To me, and maybe others too; I know they're out there somewhere.
and sorry, but the truth hurts sometimes and you have to deal with it; doesn't help if you push it away.
 Mar 2017 Emma
xmxrgxncy
Information
 Mar 2017 Emma
xmxrgxncy
She keeps saying I'm not trying to get better.

I don't even understand why I'm like this, why my emotions are so demanding, why my skin aches to be carved into designs and swirls of the brightest hues of red.

If I knew, I'd explain.

But apparently, information that slips my lips is nonexistent. I'm not trying to get better, I don't want to get better, I'm not accepting the help she tries to offer...

Would it hurt you a bit to just listen? I can barely speak as it is, but when I do,the yelling overpowers it.

I just want a hug. And friends.

And death.
 Mar 2017 Emma
xmxrgxncy
Echoes
 Mar 2017 Emma
xmxrgxncy
Darling?

Darling?

Darling?

I love you, I swear it.
I'm not upset, I swear it.
I'm safe, I swear it.

I'm better- can you believe that?

We say I love you over the phone in an echoing tone
Over and over and over again.

It is only now that I realize it's for each and every day we cannot talk, so that not a day goes by without being filled with one. And I smile at this realization.

And I hope you do too. You're beautiful with a smile and without.

But seeing that smile gives me so much hope, angel.

And I love you.

I love you.

I love you.
Note to my dearest wife..........don't worry about your spouse:) she's doing alright, promise promise.
 Mar 2017 Emma
Sophia Lynne
Untitled
 Mar 2017 Emma
Sophia Lynne
are you still blind?
you'd run into a pole with your eyes closed and call that poetry

sls
 Mar 2017 Emma
xmxrgxncy
Life?
 Mar 2017 Emma
xmxrgxncy
How is it that living can so easily be mistaken for sleeping? Like, I could be dreaming all this right now and wake up to my words flying off the screen and into an oblivion lit with only the red of eyes of monsters ready to eat me up at a second glance. But maybe not. Maybe we're all living a digital life that we'll one day just digitize away from because we ran out of power. Sometimes I wish I knew how to pull the plug.
 Mar 2017 Emma
Tanisha Jackland
I don't ask for much
a kiss now and then
To be spoken to
with reverence and kindness

My throat is somehow
not speaking its truth
these days
just a succumbing to every
whim but mine

and nothing to show for it
but this lousy t-shirt
that says "life is good"
It can't be that easy
where are the t-shirts
that proclaim the truth

*"Life is good as long as you
don't have a clue about anything.
Life is a conglomerate of
contradictions at which we all should
strive to embody the center of nonduality
for true inner peace."
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