Tackles and heartache
Concessions and new take
These nights have
Become a race
For who can cry
The fastest
A contest
Where everyone
Loses
Life doesnt know winners
Life doesnt know victory
Because in the end
Death will beat
Us all

Were i to die
And fill the ground
Would you somberly
Gather round

Would you claim to have love
My hair and eyes
And give your conciense
Some alibi

Would you tell my mother
We were close friends?
Would you tell my father
You knew me back when?

Would you even know
Who belonged to the name
Lining the paper
On that inevitable day

Would you **** your head
Shouting "Oh Yeah!"
Finding you knew me
Before i was dead

Im ok with that
I dont expect you to know
Done lie to my family
Dont act like you know

Few people are entitled
To claim me as a friend
Few people know me
Or where ive been

Dont think it polite
To say it was sad
Dont say im in heaven
It would make me quite mad

My friends will say
With a laugh that ive known
"That ***** is in hell,
Shes taken back her throne."

I hope they wont cry
But i know they will
Theyre a bunch of babies
And i would miss them still

Just whenever i die
When that day comes
I want life to go on
I dont want life to be numb

I know people love me
I wont deny that
So i hope that they move on
Ill be happy with that

a permanent frost
has become me
and no matter what i do
i have become
infinitely
eternally
cold

Why do I feel this way?
It's so unusual
I am actually
Truly
Happy


I know that this is a good thing
Why do I keep thinking
It will go away so quickly?
Maybe it's because I'm never happy for long.

Though this is a different kind of happy
This is the one where i actually feel as if
I'm going to be okay

******* Brain
Severed Membrane
Sharing the blame
Taking back my name

Im over it
So done with it
Tired of holding you
When you get hit

Youre cold and
Ignorant
Yet somehow
Burnt out

youre lying down
like a dog
in the dirt

holding your head
like a child
youre hurt

and i cant be there
to cradle your pity
i cant hold on
while you run

Youll drag me down
If i feel sorry for you
Ill be afraid to leave
Ill be afraid id break you

and maybe i will
maybe youll shatter
maybe you just need
to rebuild