„Yours  truly“
Finished page, just sign the letter with your name.
Be careful, since you only have that one shot at this game.
No hurries
Once the whitey paper ***** in all the ink,
Lean back and pour yourself a glass of the very special drink.
No wine and no beer conceals the bottle
No headache nor vertigo next day
The memories will no longer hunt you down
Just take the road and let be shown the way.

There is too much to question
and too much aggression
I have a confession
it’s my indiscretion
Breath of a cancer
Touch of elegant dancer
Ego enhancer
But never an answer

Flashback
into the days when everything was black and white
when simply enough you could tell what’s wrong and what is right
Oh wait
that must have been another section of the book
because this chapter is what they unmercifully took
Browsing the shelves inside the library
Hoping to find the missing parts
The bookcases stare at you adversary
Sometimes you just don’t get the perfect cards

There was too much to question
and only aggression
through my confession
gone’s indiscretion
away with the cancer
exhausted’s the dancer
being the balancer
while seeking the answer

Too often
washing off everyone’s melancholy stink
wishing they would just one day ****** off and got a shrink
One’s mind
absorbs the good from people but the bad as well
on the outside, though, it makes sure that no one can ever tell
The book of the dead is not a fairy tale
And the book of life isn’t yet for rent
All there is left is to come up with a plan
On how to stand up when the body’s bent

Now this is the answer
this is the balancer
rise again will the dancer
whilst free of the cancer
no more indiscretion
no need for confession
void of aggression
rid of oppression at last.

There’s a cliff
You’re standing on it
Saw that image many times in my head
It was always sundown
And salt was in the air

Tried to take your hand
You let me briefly
I squeezed it gently, smiled at you
You gave me a glance
There was nothing in it
And you let go off my hand.

Edge being so so close, I slipped
Tried to grab your hand
But you weren’t seeing me
There was a new hand in yours
And you pushed me away.

Falling down, I didn’t fight
Knew it was over
And the dark wasteness waiting below
Took a deep breath, blinked
And salt was in the air

I was watching you for quite a while
Your deep brown eyes and your smile
Kept telling myself it's not wise
But in the end the heart always tries.

When I was laying down on your chest
Breathless, thinking 'you're the best'
You said 'I need a shower'
And I regained my power
And then you took me again.

Is it wrong or is it just right
That my ******* look like after a fight
And when I close my eyes I still can feel
How deep you were inside of me
I think you just ****** my brain out

I don't even mind that you snore
But when I'm awake I want some more
And thus 5am to me you have shown
How electric can be 'nice and slow'

You kissed me deep and touched my hair
Then you entered me and breathe I didn't dare
When you started to move inside
I could no longer hold my sigh
'You're amazing' slipped right through my lips.

Is it wrong or is it just right
That my thighs look like after a fight
And when I close my eyes I still can feel
How deep you were inside of me
I think you just ****** my brain out.

You gave me memories I'll treasure
And not just about the pleasure
When you asked if there'll be number ten
I had no idea back then

From the start you made perfectly clear
That a man in love I don't have to fear
I guess it made me feel free
You'd willingly want to be
Another number to me

But what I have miscalculated
Was that my feelings might get escalated
The more time we spent with each other
I kind of wished there wasn't another

But the die is cast, that's the game
In honesty there is no shame
Seeing you with others
Was the moment I knew
I was just another number to you.

Is it wrong or is it just right
That you brought my dark heart in the light
When I close my eyes I can still feel
How tight you were holding me
I think you've just taken my heart.

I don’t need your money
I don’t seek your attention
I don’t want the love we had
And I hate the memories we once shared

Being torn apart
Screaming until you have no voice
Crying for help that won’t come
You’re in pain but you feel none

Some call you crazy for the things you try
Some find it admirable not knowing it’s all a lie
When there’s no escape and you know you’ve tried
Take every chance that arise to revive what long ago died.

It’s been quite a journey my friend
but now it’s time for it to end
So please, my stupid heart
Give it up so my life can start

Hey dad
Surprised to hear from me?
It’s been forever since I saw you
Do you remember me?

Hey dad
You have been here for me
But only as a pair of chains
That poisons the blood in my veins
And messes with my head
Hey dad

Again and again
When I choose a way
I’m weighed down by the past
That you took away

Again and again
Counting my mistakes
One followed by another
Just saying, you’re my father
Just kidding, you don’t care
How’s that fair?

One day
Maybe I’ll understand
Why you couldn’t stay with me
And hold my hand

One day
Maybe I’ll finally feel strong
To forgive you that you left, at last
And let go of the ghost of past
„Hey dad“ you’ll hear me say
One day.

But for now
The only thing I do
Is writing silly songs
as is this one too

And for now
I am stil set in my old ways
Of thinking how things could have been
And choosing men who are wrong for me
Then crying when I’m sad
Thanks Dad

So here you go
This letter is for you
It’s just few simple words
But it will have to do

And I don’t know
If you have anything to say
But I no more wanna live with the doubt
Whether my whole life I’ve been missing out
Not having you around
I said it out loud

I wanted you to understand
This was no game to me
When I was reaching for your hand
I needed you to see

Choosing you
I did something new
I tried to break the ice
But how you answered wasn’t nice

You hit me hard
From the start
Made me believe
That you wouldn’t leave
Then in front of me
So that I could see
You changed your mind
Didn’t even tried to hide

It only takes a little while
To wipe out somebody’s joy
If you expected me to smile
You should have chosen a different toy
Now off you go
Rather fast than slow
There’s no more place for you
So go and play with someone new

You hit me hard
Not like from the start
Could not believe
How you chose to leave
There was nothing kind
In how you changed your mind
And if you can’t tell
Then all I have to say is go to hell.

We used to be so close
Like two bodies and one soul
But when you put two stars together
Sooner or later they explode

And thus one day years ago
Till today I still don’t know
What exactly made you realize
You don’t want me anymore
In your life

I don’t wanna say I’m sorry
I hurt you, you hurt me too
But I can’t help to think and worry
How should I live without you
We have sides that are different
But deep down we’re the same
My dear and only sister
I just want you in my life again

From others I only know
About the places where you go
And every painful silent mile
Only makes the distance grow

I feel it’s time to unpack
It doesn’t have to be white or black
And every painful hidden smile
Will only make it hard to come back
Back home

I don’t wanna say I’m sorry
I hurt you, you hurt me too
But I can’t help to think and worry
How should I live without you
We have sides that are different
But deep down we’re the same
My dear and only sister
I just want you in my life again.

Now I no more want to care
But the silence I cannot bear
Facing another cold rejection
Picking up the phone I just don’t dare