The Red Woman

The Red Woman Jun 2019

i hate myself too much to
love you

The Red Woman Jun 2019

dear ex friend
when did you
fall out of love
with me
with our friendship
with our memories

was it when you moved back
or when you got a girlfriend

actually
why
and when doesn’t
matter
what matters is that
you left
when i needed you the most

(note for him in my language, even though he’ll never see) Kære tevelis. Du er en nar. Du forlod mig. Bare fordi du fik en kæreste. Jeg troede os to og alt vi havde gjort var specielt. Jeg har altid forsvaret dig. Altid. Og altid værdsat dig og husket dig. Du er sådan en idiot. Jeg er så sur på dig, men jeg ønsker dig kun alt godt, så jeg lader dig være. **** dig. Farvel Mantas.

Jun 2019

thesa

the first one

you were the first one to look at me
as if i really was someone
worth looking at

#the #first #one #look #at #me #really #someone #worth #it

The Red Woman Jun 2019

father figure

i spent two years
looking up to you
admiring you
your work
your thoughts
your being

and then I got sick
i crumbled mentally
vanished bit by bit

i started doing stuff
that I wasn’t allowed to
i wanted to feel something
be something else than just a
grey matter
in a grey world

you disapproved
but you didn’t say anything
nothing
you almost let me
self destruct

and now that someone has
intervened
i am trying to make a
mence
but you don’t care
you only see the few bad things
you forgot me
and us
you forgot that i
need you

you used to inspire me
and make me laugh
now all you ever do is
make me cry

The Red Woman Jun 2019

wordplay about my father

i choose to play with words
altough they usually hurt
both good and bad
kind of like the father that i once had
this is my time to heal
and that i will not let him steal
he's now in the past
and that's how it and i
am going to last