I think the saddest part of growing older
is watching everyone else find happiness
in the places that you spent years searching through
and came up empty handed
every
single
time.

I feel like I’m underwater;
I’m drowning in the dark.
Shaking and screaming
as the water fills my lungs.

I’m drowning in the dark,
alone and afraid.
Kicking and screaming
Against the icy water.

Alone and afraid
I long for your touch
against the icy water
to keep me warm.

I long for your touch,
caressing my skin
to keep me warm
while my body goes numb.

Caressing my skin,
the darkness wraps around me.
While my body goes numb,
my mind fills with fear.

The darkness wraps around me--
shaking and screaming,
my mind fills with fear.
I feel like I’m underwater.