im here.
i pushed her,
she is shocked,
she is crying,
she is scared.
i walk away,
out the door.
she ask me
"why?"
with such a fragile tone.
she wails,
she screams.
hands slamming on
the ground.
i dont look back,
i keep walking forward.
fist clenched,
i slam the door frame,
she stops,
i slam the door.
the car engine starts.
im gone.

i'm sorry
you couldn't find anything
to firmly grasp

i'm sorry
i couldn't be there
to hold you in my arms

“he's in a happier place”,
they tell me,
but i know it's not enough

when i know that,
without you,
my happy place is lost

He sleeps on the same side of the bed
As you did
I miss you lying there
Sometimes
But he's there now

Baby if you call me at 4 am,
Too sad to even say hello,
I will listen to your sadness,
Until you fall asleep.