Instead of growing old can I grow young
can I go back to no stress no worries
just daisies and fun
oh when I was young
can I swing as high as possible
and try to get high enough to fly
can I twirl around in a dress
with my hands up it the air
can I remember the days
exploring in the woods
getting new ideas for games
can I go back to the days
where I was young
care free and happy
where I had it together
and giggled at what ever
where I had fake weddings in the back yard
and my favorite stuffed pig
I never watched my weight
or what was on my plate
I smiled at the time
and never had a daemon
man if I could go back to that time
just for a day

Try to speak but the words don't come out right
I don't cry but my tears like to put up a fight
Sick of this pain
Sick of this pity
What's next
will my life me in vain
Feel like **** every day
Will someone please help me
I don't want to but I do
My mind says yes while my heat says no
What's next for me
Is it time to go
I'm depressed
I'm a mess
Hate self pity
But I do it any ways
God when will I feel happy agin
This is just a sick game
I remember nothing before I became depressed
They Speak of I life I do not know
Oh what dose it feel like to be happy
Sick of this pain
Sick of this pity
What's next
Will my life be in vain
Feel like **** every day
Will some one please help me
I don't want to but I do
My mind says yes while my heart says no
Oh when will it be time for me to go
Can't you help me
Please can't you before I cave to self harm
Before I let the scars stay forever on my arm
I'm sick of this ****
I can't smile with out it being a lie
I don't let myself cry
sick of this pain
Sick of this pity

Watch as it grows
Spout my beautiful rose
I watch as it blackens
I Watch as death beckons
Tears in eyes
why must all beautiful things die
When spring is calling
Life comes once agin
But when it's death reaches we gather
Say a prayer
As the beauty goes six feet under
All wonderful things must come to an end
So I watch
my beautiful black rose
I watch as it grows

I need a muse
I think I blew a fuse
I can't think of what to write
I'm all out of ideas
I cant get it right
Iv lost this fight
Going through it all
Hoping I won't fall
I finally think I may win

I was lost then you found me
You helped me get off the ground
I had no idea who I could trust
I made a mistake And trusted the devil inside me
it left me a hollow empty shell
Stressed and depressed
I was insecure
Lying on that floor
I pushed every one away
Letting tears fill my eyes
While everyone believed my lies
Few knew the truth behind my smile
I was a mess you ruined me
Now I'm a broken girl
Hurt by your broken promises
Blood stained wrist
Tears falling every where
you said you would always be there for me
you said you said you would never give up on
me well to late
I'm rebuilding the gate around my heart
broken beaten and dead
they will never understand
why I lie
they believe the masque
and never look into my eyes
I'm a self harmer with no armor
my skin is paper it's my canvas
I cut and draw
they see and I say it was just the cat
while I tip my hat
this is the life as a self harmer

Falling down a deep hole
dark and lonely
until you find that rabbit
you were chasing after
no longer lonely
no longer dark
you fall into this bad habit
I found my rabbit
you are my bad habit
I'm falling
pushing every one away every day
just for you
your all I need
I'm handing you my heart
now just grab it
cause your my bad habit
I'm falling down this dark hole
just a lonely soul
your my bad habit
I wanna spend every minute safe in your arms
with you I feel free
your pulling me in even more now
I need you so much more now
your my bad habit
I'm getting addicted
thought I had control over my bad habit
but the longer I'm away
the more I want to play
with my bad habit